1 Mr. Unfashionable

I am trying to keep it together. I'm calling my mom for her not to close her eyes while holding her in my arms.

"Mama! Mama!"

I don't want her to leave me. I want her to stay. I want to tell her so many things. There's so much we didn't get to do.

"F-forgive me," she's trying to say something.

"I d-don't want to-"

"Stop talking, Mama. Save your breath."

I am crying and I can't breathe it's like while watching her there's a part of me that she's taking with her.

I don't have any energy to say anything.

She touches my right cheek with her left hand.

"My sweet daughter," I look at her almost choking.

I waited for her to say something but she vanishes in front of my eyes.

"Mama?"

I look for her in this vast darkness but she was nowhere to be found.

"MAMA!"

I called out to her as loud as I can. But she was gone.

And then there's a voice that echoed through my mind.

She will never come back. Because I took her place.

I woke up with sweats on my forehead. I am catching my breath even if I'm just on my bed. I sat down and touch my head. It's always like this all the time. I have nightmares all the time but I'm still waking up. How ironic.

"Jedi, what happened?" I look on my right side. My dad who I call 'Papsi' goes inside my room.

I didn't even hear the door on my room opening. Because I'm still in a state of shock. But I don't want my dad to worry about me. So, I try to smile.

"It's nothing Papsi. I'm okay." I smile like a little girl who wants something from her dad.

"Is breakfast ready?" after saying that I stretch and yawn a bit. I'm still sleepy. But I need to work.

"It will be ready in a bit. Are you sure you're okay?"

I look up at my dad and I saw concern in his eyes. I know he wants me to open up to him. But I am still hesitant to tell him anything. He has so many things to take care of in our home. I don't want to be a burden.

I stand up on my bed and push him to go outside my room.

"I'm fine dad. Let me do my morning rituals."

Without waiting for his answer, I close the door to my room. I hope he didn't get hurt by what I did. I'll just apologize to him later.

I took a deep breath and look at myself in the mirror inside my room.

Are you going to pretend that you didn't hear me?

I close my eyes and try to calm myself. I need to focus. I open my eyes and put my hair in a messy bun and put a purple hair claw clip on it.

You will always be weak, Jedi.

No. I am stronger than you.

That voice is always creeping in and tries to get out. This is the reason why I need to be busy all the time. So, she will be buried deep inside my mind. When my focus is on something like my work, I can't hear that voice.

She's like a buried conscience that I don't want to hear.

Conscience is supposed to be a good thing. It will tell you right from wrong. But the voice I'm hearing is bad news. And it will do me no good if she surfaces.

I ate my breakfast with my dad and two cute siblings name Rence and Otep. I like to give cute nicknames on my family. When our mom died; our dad is the one who prepares everything for us. Even my uniform on my work, he is the one who irons it and I told him many times not to do it. But he always insists that he wants to do it for me. My dad is my hero.

Also, I have two older brothers who are a pain in the ass. But don’t tell them that. Anyway, the one who is so much scarier than my dad is Vince. I call him kuya Vince. And there’s another one who is talkative, carefree, without a care in the world called Andrew. I call him kuya Drew because he says it’s cool to call him that. I just roll my eyes at him.

I finished my breakfast and took a shower for 15 minutes because that's how I roll. Sometimes when I'm on my day off it will take me 30 minutes inside the shower. And my brothers will be mad at me for being so slow. I just laugh it off.

I put on a simple white big t-shirt and some skinny jeans underneath it and black sneakers.

When I am going to work, it's like I'm never coming home. I have a lot of clothes that I need to put on my cute purple backpack who has a design of galaxies all over it.

I wave goodbye to my dad and he even follows me outside our house. I give him a big smile and thank him for the breakfast. I apologize already for pushing him and he told me he understands.

There are some things that I need to keep for myself. And he even told me that if I'm ready, he will be there to listen. I almost cry in front of our dining table. But I just continue eating. I didn't get to see my two older brothers for breakfast and my dad just said that they have some things to take care of. It's rare for them to not eat breakfast with us. I just shrug it off.

I took a UV express going to work. It's not a train, it's just like a big van converted to use for business purposes. A three-seater will become four because the driver wants more passengers. So that he will have double income. Going to work is a hustle because of the long traffic. It is a problem way back when I was not even born. I need to leave very early for me to be on time for my work.

Sometimes I have backaches for sitting too long and my position is only the other cheek of my butt is sitting and the other is in the door of the van. I mean imagine the horror. It's so crowded every day. But I need to endure it.

I arrived at my destination and I put my right hand on my back, it hurts again. It took one hour and a half of sitting and my butt not having a rest. It will be a crazy long day ahead.

I forgot my watch that my mom gave me. I am forgetful. I just took my keypad cellphone and look at the time. It's only 6:45 am and I still got time. I have plenty of time. When I left for work it's still dark. Good thing that I always wake up early, because of my nightmares. I don't need my alarm clock. It's like my body knows when to wake up. Or is she- I dismiss the thought.

As I walk going to my first job, I see different kinds of people. Some of them hurrying to get to work. Others having conversations while smoking. Women walking their co-workers and just laughing hard while talking. Some just looking at their cellphones without noticing anyone around them. Good thing I don't have that so-called touch screen cellphones. I might get addicted to it. I'll just stick to my music.

I listen to one song while walking. It's called 'it's okay if you forget me.' It's a sad song actually about a girl who is singing about her ex-boyfriend. I don't have an ex but I like the melody of the whole song and the meaning.

When I opened the glass door of the beautiful coffee shop and heard the bell, I know I'm home. I heard their different greetings towards me.

“Good morning Jedi!"

"Good morning JL!"

"Good morning Jed!”

"Good morning guys," I said while walking inside.

Our security guard even greeted me. "Good morning JL," with a smile on his face.

This is what keeps me going and giving also a smile on my face.

"Good morning Mr. Lucio," I said back.

As usual, Aimee a cute girl with wavy short-length hair came towards me.

"JL, you're here. Ethan is also here now," she told me while holding my right arm. She keeps smiling and waiting for my reply. But I didn't I just kept silent.

She follows me even in the locker room. I roll my eyes at her. This girl wants me to have a love life for a long time now. I put down my bag and she still looks at me with a smile on her face.

"I don't care if he's early. He works here, of course, he needs to be on time. Stop your matchmaking games and go back to work," I dismiss her but she won't stop buggering me.

"You know the guy you're ignoring is so damn hot. He's tall, brown eyes, a little muscular and-"

I ignore her and start to prepare my uniform. White shirt with collar and brown slacks underneath. And a cute brown cap that also has the logo on it. A brown apron that has the logo of the coffee shop Rick's Latte of Love. It sounds corny to me at first and I don't like coffee that much. But I learn to like it while working here for almost 3 years now. I prefer hot choco with milk and a little bit of black coffee in it. Yes, I'm weird like that.

I want to get mad and stop her from being so talkative. But I don't want to ruin my day. From the moment she knew, or rather all of them knew about Ethan confessing his feelings for me, this girl right here won't stop pestering me. She wants me to talk to Ethan our co-worker but I don't want to if it's not related to work.

"he's every girl's dream guy and you are just actually ignoring him?" I roll my eyes she's still talking.

"Then go out with him," I said while walking past her. I don't want her nagging first thing in the morning. I just go with it because she is my co-worker. I have nothing against her. I'm just not interested in a guy right now.

If I'm ready, maybe I'll have a love life that Aimee's shoving in front of my face whenever she sees me.

I close the door to the comfort room and put on my working clothes. This is the only place where Aimee's nagging won't reach me. Because I lock the door. But when I got out she's still standing there waiting for me.

I took a deep breath for me to calm down. I don't want to sound harsh and I can't have a bad morning.

"Aimee, there's so much work to do. We can talk later and tell me the things you want to talk about. Go to the counter, help Sean and Dominic so we can finish preparing for us to open the shop. Okay?" I said that in one breath without sounding annoyed. When it comes to Ethan, I'm still wary to talk about him.

"Noted Mam Jedi! I'll go now, talk with you later." Aimee said and even did that salute thing that only the soldiers do. It's like I have a younger sister that I have to take care of at work.

While everyone is busy and I finished sweeping all the dried leaves, I go inside to the storage room to get the chairs for outside. Sean volunteered to clean the glass outside and I said thanks. I can carry two chairs because it’s not even heavy. It’s made of wood and the seat has foam on it but it’s lightweight. Whoever made these chairs I’m carrying right now; I can say that he or she is a genius.

I was about to get out of the storage room but someone blocks my way. When I look up, I don't know what to say.

"Do you need help with those?"

I want to say something but I heard teasing remarks from my co-workers. I can't see them because Ethan is blocking my way.

"Jedi, go for it! Talk to him."

"Is this a start of romance?"

"Ethan, you can carry my heart."

I can hear the last remark from Dominic. He is such a tease. Aimee was the one who first commented. I thought I left my little brothers in our house, turns out these guys are more like them.

Instead of answering, I push towards Ethan the chairs I'm holding and he held them. I just walk past him without saying anything.

I don't care if I seem rude but that's the only thing that I know that will keep him from pursuing me any further.

We are almost done preparing for the coffee shop to open when the bell from the entrance got our attention. Sean and Dominic, Aimee, and I are at the counter preparing all the supplies to see if there are things that we forgot to put there. Evan and Ethan are on the rooftop preparing the chairs and tables there. Aimee told me when I arrived at the counter even if I didn't ask her anything.

"Sir I'm sorry we are about to open the shop. But we still need to do a few things before we can operate," said Rick our boss. He is checking the surroundings of the whole shop if it's spotless. He is also a perfectionist and likes to check if it's everything is in order. Of course, his reputation is on the line if something goes wrong in the shop.

I saw the guy who enters the shop. He is unfashionable I have to say that. He's quite tall maybe 5'11? I can guess because my two elder brothers are six feet tall. He is wearing a red bow tie, a white polo shirt with a black jumper, checkered pants that don't match it and I can't see what his shoes look like. He is also wearing a big glass that doesn't match his personality.

He sits across from where we are in one of our leather couches here inside the shop. And he even put his feet up, I raise an eyebrow. He feels at home and how dare he do that in front of our boss? I saw the socks he's wearing and it sucks. Red with gray and white? What kind of man will wear something like that? Only him.

“I just want some coffee or anything hot that I can drink in this shop," he looks around the coffee shop and he stops to look directly at the counter. I even heard Aimee's gasp for air. What's the matter with her? He's not even handsome. I don't know why but it's like there's something wrong with her. I even heard her say something.

"Am I just hallucinating?"

I let her be with her thoughts and continue what I'm doing.

"Would you just give me some? Because I have a really bad morning. Don't worry, I'll pay you.”

"Okay, sir. Jed, can you prepare your special drink? And give it to this gentleman?"

I was lost in my thoughts because I am examining the guy. But he is just an ordinary person. Why am I even thinking about his taste in clothes?

"Right away sir," I just answered and prepared the hot choco that I like. He is quite arrogant, I must say.

After preparing the hot choco and I walk past sir Rick while talking to Evan and Ethan, I gave my hot choco to the nerd guy. He didn't say anything but I saw when he sips the drink, he nodded twice. I'm glad he likes it because it's my specialty.

The ambiance inside is like you are in a beautiful greenhouse. Natural light on the ceiling, wooden chairs as far as the eye can see. The floor has that light cement finish that helps make it look spacious. The walls of the shop are like walking on the old streets with brown bricks that will take you to an old village. Some touch of green leaves here and there completes the whole place. A home.

We are almost finished preparing to open the coffee shop when the nerd guy suddenly calls Rick to come to him. The nerve of that guy! How dare he acts like that towards our boss?

I can't help but look at them. I saw the nerd guy leans in on my boss and he whispers something that changes the facial expression of Rick.

"Is that you? Are you being serious right now?"

We can't help but overhear Rick because his voice echoed inside the shop. I just continued what I'm doing while Aimee is standing still looking and listening towards where Rick is.

"Everyone I like to introduce to you to someone that even I didn't know him at one glance," our boss is now standing side by side with the nerd guy. I heard Aimee's hard gasp like she's holding her mouth and wants to scream.

"I would like all of you to meet my good friend Zander Nathaniel Xavier."

When I heard his name it's like foreign to me and I never heard such a name in my life. I must say it's unique but I don't care. I was surprised when Aimee run towards that nerd guy. She asks for an autograph and a photo with her. The guy refuses to do so. Poor Aimee. But still, her reaction is over the top and I can't help but be annoyed a bit. Because she was so excited to see that guy.

"I knew it! I'm not hallucinating or anything. I knew it was you! You can't hide your identity from me. Every inch of you, I know it."

I'm the one who is ashamed after what Aimee said. She is what you call a die-hard fan. I'm also a fan of singers but I'm not like her. I know my limits and I keep the excitement to myself. I can't be like her.

I can't help but wonder, who is he? Is he famous? I've never heard of him before. Besides, I'm more into music than actors and actresses. Maybe that's why I don't know him. But still, why should I care?

Most of them greeted the guy our security guard shook hands with him even Sean, Dominic smiles at the nerd guy and I was quite shaken. Those two cousins rarely smile at anyone. If it's our customers it's a must to smile. But for them to do that? Are my eyes playing tricks on me right now? Evan also shook hands with that guy. Only me and Ethan didn't go where that nerd guy is right now. I'm glad that I'm not the only one who doesn't care who he is.

I'm still puzzled about what is the commotion and I didn't know that I will say something.

"Who is he? Aimee, you overreacted. You ask for an autograph and photo but he refuses. Is that even polite?"

"It's okay, Jedi. He's a famous actor, and he’s one of the hottest heartthrobs in our country right now. He is always on the cover of every famous magazine I know.”

Aimee is so excited to tell me who is the guy inside our coffee shop right now. But I don’t like his attitude. I don’t like him at all.

"He just removes his big glasses and now you are all happy to see him. He's not even handsome."

I know what I said hit a nerve because I saw Aimee gulp and all of their attention are on me.

“You call him a heartthrob Aimee? More like a magnet of a nerd. Mr. Nerd is more suitable to him. His face is okay and my elder brothers are more manly than him.”

I didn’t know what happens next. Because the next thing I knew he walk towards the counter where I am; he grabs my hand and pulls me away to go outside the coffee shop.

I forgot that I was the only one left at the counter. And he is so strong that I can’t get out of his grip.

"Let me go! Hey! Stop!" I said while trying to get out of the grip of this nerd guy.

I saw Ethan and our boss Rick behinds us. We are now in the parking lot in front of the coffee shop.

“Let her go, Nathan. She didn’t mean what she said,” Rick said when he catches up to us.

I want to say that I meant every word. But I stop myself from answering. What is wrong in saying the truth?

“You’re hurting her. Let her go, now.”

Ethan walks towards us and he looks intently at this guy who is still holding my arm. This is the first time I’m seeing how serious he is. And I got scared a little. But I’m more annoyed with this guy who might break my arm.

“I don’t want to,” the nerd guy also became serious.

“I want to talk to her alone.”

I can’t take this anymore. I don’t want to be in between their raging hormones. I want to get out of here.

“Let me go! Just let go! You might break my arm. We’ll talk, okay?” I tried to sound calm but I am getting annoyed at the minute. What did I do?

The nerd guy didn’t even listen to me. He just ignores what I said. How dare he?

“Nathan, let her go. We have work to do. I need her, she’s my employee.” I look at Rick and I saw his expression like he’s trying to apologize to me.

“I'll pay the damages; just let me talk to this woman. She needs to know who I am.”

I don’t know what came into me but I have this urge to punch him in the face. He’s annoying and a brat! How dare he do this to a girl? No wonder he doesn’t have a girlfriend, or does he? I don’t care anymore. I just spoke what’s on my mind and this is what I get? He has no respect for a woman. I feel sorry for his girlfriend if he ever will have one in the future.

I can feel the tension between them and I want to stop them. But my annoying state is the one stopping me from interfering.

“We don’t care who you are. Let her go, now.”

“It’s not your f*cking business,” he looks at my boss.

“Now Rick, I'll take her for a while. You know what I mean, right?”

My mind became blank after the nerd guy talk. And all I can hear in my mind is the last thing he said.

Does Rick know what he is talking about? My boss, our boss knows something about what he is doing? What is going on?

“I’ll let you be for now; besides you’re just going to talk to her.”

My boss turns his back from us and walks toward inside the coffee shop. I can't say any word. I want to protest how calm he is right now.

Does he trust this nerd guy that much to let him do what he wants?

"Ethan, let's go inside. We have a lot to do." Rick slightly touches Ethan's left shoulder and the next thing I know he's gone from my sight.

Only Ethan is looking at us. Rick left me here. My boss for 4 years that I trust the most in the world, left just like that.

I stop protesting and let this nerd guy do what he wants. I will look like an idiot because whatever I say, he will never loosen his grip on my arm. I will not give him what he wants.

Ethan walks towards the nerd guy and I saw how tall he is compared to this brat. Yeah, that's how I see him. A big spoil brat.

"If something happens to her, I swear, your corpse will never be found," Ethan said while holding the nerd guy's collar.

He smiles with confidence. I hate his smile it's annoying.

"A threat huh? You have to do better than that," He leans forward and their nose almost touches "boy. Run along now, your dad is waiting inside."

I thought Ethan will say something but he loosens his grip on this nerds collar and walks away.

The nerd guy opens the door to his black car and ushers me to go inside. But I refuse.

"Get inside," he loosens his grip a little. And I was about to run but he said something that made me not move.

"If you run, I'll tell Rick to fire you," he looks at me seriously. But I'm not afraid of him. "You don't want that do you? One call and you will lose everything.”

He is threatening me. I know my rights and I can call the police to report him. But I don't have my cellphone with me. Because this bastard just pulled me away like I'm some dog with a leash. How dare him!

Do you want me to take over?

That voice wants to get out. No.

I close my eyes and tried to calm myself. But I can't calm down.

I open my eyes, look at him with disgust and anger. "Why should I go with you? I don't even know you."

"Why did you have to close your eyes?" he asked.

"You don't have to know," I retort back.

“I don't like to wait. If you will not get in, you will lose your job.”

Here comes another threat but it doesn't arrive as a threat to me more like a warning. If I don't do what he wants, he will do something that I'll regret. That's what I can understand base on his tone of voice.

After battling with my mind and the voice inside my head, I came with an answer.

"Fine! I'll come with you." I give up.

Just like that, I'm inside a car of a stranger I barely knew and he drove without a care if I'm wearing my seatbelt or not.

I hope I can come out of here alive.