Commitment and disappointment

Angel was rewinding her love life with Moon ,the person he is in love with for about 17 years. Uncountable times they have broken up and patched up but this time it was almost 4 years, they are not in touch with each other. It feels surreal for sure but it's true .

Angel was in deeply Love with him ,the most passionate love. Whenever she was with him she just wanted to be close with him . She used to hold his hands, kiss him and hug him whenever possible. She was like the lead character in their relationship .

The best part was their intimacy . She never enjoyed that intimacy with another person. Whenever they were engaged in intimacy , they were in heaven. The way he held her , kissing gently grasping her lip and the way he looks at her with full of love and passion made her go crazy over him . Although she never fully enjoys it because everytime she gets engaged in it she would feel tremendous pain both mentally and physically . But still for Moon she could bear everything. She just love being with him and her most beautiful moments were when he used to sleep on her chest hugging her like a small kid . She would simply caress his hair and kissing on forehead and she looks at him like a kid looking at her favourite toy . Everything was so perfect except the feeling of misery she felt everytime when she couldn't speak about her past to him .

But somehow she gathered her courage to speak to him but before that she wanted his commitment but he was neither ready for marriage nor for engagement . He never made her feel secure. He wanted his older brother to get married and then settlement in business but she was his last priority . She was disappointed as all she wanted was a family as she needed a loving and caring family . She wanted him to understand her a little bit . She wanted to have babies , she wanted to be momma as she wanted to relive the childhood memories that she missed and hated so much . But, now she wanted to replace with the new memories of her child .

It was 5th Dec '13, the day before his birthday . She wanted to be with him that day but he choose to spend time with his family . All he did was to meet her for 30 min just to get intimate with her. She felt betrayed. She wanted to so much for him but he didn't even felt necessary to understand her. She didn't wanted to spoil his day as it was his birthday . So, she hid her disappointment and let him go .Like every year that year too she made a handmade card for him . She knitted a scarf for him and gifted him as for her handmade things always held the highest value. But he never appreciates it .

After his birthday she decided to open herself up to him , she wanted to tell him everything . So, she asked him to go on a long ride and spend some time before the year pass as she needs to talk to him or she cannot stay with him with the lingering pain of her past .