Smile For Me

"Oh! I didn't think you'd be coming down until tomorrow."

Tingting stood in the kitchen with an apron tied around her thin waist. The way her hair fell in soft waves around her neck and her rosy cheeked complexion made her seem exceptionally charming. It was a shame that there was nobody to appreciate such beauty.

"What gave you that impression?"

Mike munched on a few of the side dishes already laid out on the floor. As the dining room was (luckily for the boys) in a horrible condition from the fire, food was eaten on the kitchen floor for convenience. Besides, it had been cleaned enough and a new carpet had been lain out for hygiene too.

"Oh, you know, how you lost your minds yesterday and started acting like a manic duo..." Tingting plated a few more dishes while throwing this line out nonchalantly.

Mike froze.

"Sis, let's not mention this from now on."

"Sure~"

Lukas entered in not too soon after.

"You..."

He squinted his eyes at Mike, his expression not too friendly.

"Huh? Bro, did I do something?"

"No... Never mind."

"Oh, ok."

Lukas sat down in his spot and bit the ends of his chopsticks impatiently. Mike was on the opposite side using his as drumsticks.

They didn't have to wait for too long.

"Alright boys, tuck in. This is your reward for cleaning those rooms out. I went all out this time!"

As soon as Tingting sat down, Lukas took one of everything and placed it in his own bowl.

"Bro, no fair!"

Mike followed Lukas's example

"Don't fight, don't fight. By the way... How are you eating so quickly?!"

Tingting stared in amazement at a certain someone's eating form.

"Bro, you need to slow down! You're going to choke on it!"

The spotlight was shone onto the boy with golden hair.

Though Lukas was inhaling the food at great speeds, he still managed to make it look elegant. He set his chopsticks down and stood up after thanking Tingting for the meal.

"I'm going to go on a walk."

"Bye~"

"See you later~"

...

He felt stupid.

Very stupid.

How should he say this...

He had walked out of the mansion in nothing but a t-shirt when the sun decided to act bashful and hid behind thick clouds.

His pride wouldn't allow him to go back to fetch a jacket so he had to bear with it. His arms felt so numb, he couldn't tell if he had goosebumps or not anymore. Did it even matter?

What he was saying was,

It was cold.

Unbelievably so.

He wanted to go back.

He wanted to go home.

But he couldn't.

Now do you understand?

It was already too late for that anyway.

He made his way through the forest of creepers leading him to the uppertowns.

'Let's visit Yu Jing'

He needed to teach that little boy a lesson. Leaving your elders to suffer while you enjoy yourself at home. Tutoring? Ha! He didn't believe it.

...Although he said that, his feet were already forcing him to walk in the direction of the hospital. Knowing it was no use, he bought a bright bouquet of daisies and a pretty diary for the old granny on the way.

...

Lukas stood at the familiar entrance of the hospital. This time he didn't need to ask the reception lady for help and he headed straight for the granny's ward.

His heart pound with anticipation as he walked through the pristine corridors. Her expression when he arrived alone, would she smile or frown? Would she like the gifts? He couldn't help but doubt his actions. His steady pace slowed. Was this really alright? It wasn't like he was her family. He had barely spoken to her too. It had mostly been the others while he stood off to the side. He couldn't help it. Watching them was... enjoyable? No, that wasn't it. It just felt like... It was his role?...

He finally arrived at the ward.

He reached for the handle but his hand faltered. Why was he so indecisive?

A nurse opened the door from the inside and jumped back in fright seeing someone just standing there. Lukas apologised awkwardly and stepped inside.

The decision was made for him.

Old lady Xiu spotted him immediately and waved him over. Having nobody to hide behind, Lukas pulled up a chair beside the old lady and sat down. First he handed over the gifts.

'They're beautiful. Thank you.'

The corners of her eyes crinkled and she beamed in delight. The old lady was genuinely pleased with the gifts he had brought her.

Lukas breathed a silent sigh of relief. After a couple of minutes of meaningless chatter, he decided to find out how she was faring.

"How have you been lately? I hope we haven't been troubling you. Mike is a bit rowdy and Yu Jing is... eccentric?..."

Old lady Xiu shook her head, reassuring him that they caused her no trouble at all.

'You're all like my little children.'

She flipped the page of her notebook. Her writing bore no strength but still gave off a type of tender elegance.

'Yu Jing who looks shy on the outside but has a great imagination and hides his true strength.'

Another page.

'Tingting who is kind and caring.'

She flipped it again.

'Mike who makes others happy just by being there.'

The crisp turn of the thin paper slowed.

'And you, who hides behind an expressionless face, I could tell that you were just hurt, and found it hard to trust anybody.'

"Granny..."

'Your sad, lonely face... You've changed. You smile, laugh, argue, and joke around. This old woman is very happy.'

On the same page, a simple line was written.

'What is your name?'

Time paused and Lukas felt a choking sensation at the back of his throat. He managed to spit some words back at her, wincing at its harsh undertone.

"Don't you already know?"

The granny shook her head. The pen nib touched the paper once more.

'You know what I mean.'

Lukas looked at her, his gaze deep.

He knew what she meant.

"...Liu Feng."

'Liu Feng. I wish I could speak to say it.'

"It doesn't really matter."

Lukas smiled bitterly. He held no attachment to this name. Not once had it been said out of affection or concern. His name only reminded him of the intense loathing he was exposed to every day.

'Ah, thinking about it now, there was that one strange classmate...'

'Feng'er, I don't know what happened in the past but there is something you need to know. No matter what you think, you are loved.'

His old friend, and his new friends... Did they truly cherish him? Was his existence something important to them?

'Why can't you see it? How happy you are around them, and how happy they are around you.'

"Even you?"

The words came out before he could stop himself. Before he could say anything else, the granny quickly scribbled,

'Of course!'

Of course? To say it with such certainty, did she really mean it?

Ever since his mother's death, all he faced was scorn, and disgust.

If it was from some unrelated person, he wouldn't have cared. But the rejection came from his own father.

How could he not feel hurt?

Unknowingly, the tears slid down his cheek. Warm droplets splashed onto the blanket covers, his relief soaking into it slowly. Was it really alright for him to spoil himself in their kindness? He buried his face in his palms, embarrassed to show the granny his weak self.

That his friends cared for him. That their existences had already begun to fill the void in his heart.

He had already known all of this. But he was afraid of being rejected again. He was already so tired chasing after his father's affection…

Granny stroked his back softly, letting him know it was alright.

Lukas trembled. He wanted to open up his heart to her. He wanted to let her know how much she meant to him. But he couldn't. What if she disappeared? What would he do then?

This time, he must stop her from leaving. Because once she was gone, it would all be over. This warmth that wrapped him in its loving embrace would disappear.

His lower lip trembled slightly as he reached out with one hand and tugged at the corner of her clothes.

"I don't want you to go. Don't leave me alone again."

Old lady Xiu stilled. That low, trembling whisper dug into her. Her heart ached for this young boy in front of her. If only she had met him earlier. When her body was in better shape. When he hadn't been hurt to this extent.

'It's ok. I won't leave you. You'll never be alone. You have your friends. You have me.'

'Smile for this old lady. Your smile makes me happier.'

Lukas raised his head.

Though his palms were soaking in water, though his eyes were sore from the salt of his tears... His heart felt lighter.

Eyes tinged with red, the tips of his ears and nose pink, Lukas finally smiled. His lips curved softly and his eyes glistened. Not just with tears, but with another emotion. It was a smile full of happiness. One of joy. A smile befitting of a child.

An innocent smile.