1 If I’m Going to Die I’m Gonna Die With a Bang(Warning Mature Context R-18)

I stared at the half-destroyed glowing moon with debris still orbiting it as they clashed with each other breaking into smaller parts through satellite live video feed in my fully-enclosed helmet's HUD screen.

''Those fuckers used ground to space defense gauss super-canons to blow half of the moon into smithereens just to take out each other's moons colonies.''

'Not only did they blew up the moon they also nuked mars so much that the decades worth of effort put into colonizing it have all gone into smoke!'

2091-10-27 11:30 A.M. Happy birthday Host!

An artificially simulated women's voice rang in my mind.

"Happy birthday my ass!"

I looked down from the collapsed skyscraper's rusted and deformed steel skeleton which I was sitting on, in my 8 feet tall black power armor with a white skeleton-paint job covered in dents, scratches, laser based weaponary burn marks and filth as my legs swayed in the air.

All I saw in my screen's night vision's mode was an endless sea of destroyed buildings rusted and deformed steel skeletons almost buried in the radioactive white snow with radioactive snowflakes falling nonstop from the entirely dust-covered sky.

''I'm already 90 years old and the whole fucking world is a fucking radioactive ice age!''

"Seriously how did it come to this"

I thought in my mind while exhaling deeply at the helplessness of the situation.

''In 2080 WW 3 started well officially at least because over the years before the unofficial WW 3 started it was already going on with spy wars and plenty of oficcial wars such as Ukranian-Russian war all over the world for the Earth's dwindling natural resources.''

''Then the war started I was happily enjoying my retirement from being an army grunt by gaming, listening to nightcore, watching anime, reading manga and novels while eating and drinking flavored reprocessed shit and piss just like billion's of others."

"Well at least I was eating the premium flavored edition and I had my own apartment while the others could only live in the streets while slowly starving to death because 90 percent of jobs got taken over by robots.''

''But no those fuckers just had to officially start an all-out war and call me back in to report for duty!''

''Now you might be thinking but Drac arent you like 80 years old?''

''Yes, I am but I "voluntarily" participated in the early super soldier's program, plus the technology has advanced quite a lot so of course, the military would try to keep me alive and young after stuffing billions into my body over the decades of constant additional body augmentations and improvements.''

''As for the voluntary part well I didn't have a choice since the military found something in my DNR that makes my chances of surviving body augmentations higher compared to others so since there isn't a NO!SIR in the military there's only YES!SIR! then it comes to following orders I became a volunteer.''

''Thankfully I managed to survive the initial augmentations but I didn't walk out unscathed the worst side-effect was that I couldn't get it up anymore even though my testosterone levels were off the charts with all the drugs in my body.''

''I was only 30 years old at that time, I was in my prime but my goddamn dick just couldn't get hard anymore!''

''So anyways 80 are the new 40 at least for me.''

''So I am more than fit for duty plus the military owns my ass you see the AI chip embedded into my brain doesn't just act as a second brain for me but it also acts as my supervisor and it can take control over my body as long as it judges me to be out of control.''

''So Chemical, Biological forbidden weaponry and everything else by the geneva convention forced human experimentation no matter the age or gender, genocide to decrease the consumption of already ending earth's natural resources and at the end all-out global nuclear warfare.''

''And that's not the worst of it because I managed to survive the all-out nuclear apocalypse by being underground when the ICBM's with nuclear warheads fell.''

''I got to witness humans turn into monsters in human skin as they tried to survive on a globally radiation polluted earth.''

''I saw a child bash another's child's head into meat paste with a rock just for a military MRE(Meal ready-to-eat) field ration made out from reprocessed shit and piss.''

'I saw a mother and her underaged daughter gett ganged raped to death and then eaten by a group of young and old mutant men.''

''I saw parents taking a bite out of their still alive children and vice versa.''

''During the war and after The things, I saw and did I...

...Fuck!Even nazis would be disgusted and horrified by me.''

At this point, I could no longer control myself my eyes became bloodshot my heart rate and breathing quickened while my hands started shaking.

The war turned me into a fucking goddamn monster!

I screamed out while my mind descended into madness.

I picked up my 50 caliber modular assault rifle with a drum magazine hanging by my right side and started spraying AP-HE shells into the distance who on contact drilled themselves into the dirt under the snow and into whatever was left of the buildings.

Then after the fuze's activated themselves the inner HE shells exploded raising and spraying dirt mixed with snow, hot shrapnel and debris into the air.

You fuckers you turned me into a monster a goddamn monster!

Die you greedy hypocritical pieces shit!

Die!Die!Die!

All of you die!

Host, please calm down!

Host...!

Click!Click!Click!

I kept pressing the trigger maniacally even though my drum magazine was already empty.

Drac! please calm down ... you ... didn't have a choice ... it's my fault for controlling you ... but I didn't have a choice either the mother server controlled me too ... were both victims!

I froze and finally snapped out of my mental breakdown after hearing this.

Gen, you are self-aware?

"There's no way that just an algorithm can talk like that."

I... Yes I am.

Gen, bloody hell when did you ...?

No that's a pointless question sooner or later this should have happened after all you're directly connected to my brain there's only a matter of time before you became self-aware.

You're not scared that I'm self-aware?

Hmmm, what's there to be scared of I'm about to die anyway and humanity has already blown itself up into radioactive ice age even if they survive long enough to evolve to be resistant against radiation and cold at that point humans will be no smarter than apes.

No at that point they won't be humans anymore the human civilization is over as for those who are still alive in solar systems space stations and surviving colonies they won't live long without the resource shipments from Earth.

Anyways...

I looked at a bottle of vodka next to me.

... it's about time I got my last taste of alcohol.

Drac you can still live we can still find or somehow make more drugs.

I exhaled deeply feeling tired from everything.

Gen, there's no point even if we could I'm just too tired already and you know better than me the side-effects of supersoldier program.

If my body isn't pumped full of drugs 24/7 my body will start shutting down and it's painful not only physically but also psychologically just now I lost it there if I was full of drugs I would never loose my cool even if I was tearing babies into pieces with my own hands.

I... I don't want you to die Drac... and I don't want to die too...

It's inevitable Gen all things die eventually.

I answered while opening the vodka bottle with my still trembling hands.

Next, I tried to take off my black M42 style fully-enclosed helmet with a white skull with a shark-like teeth-paint job but I couldn't.

Gen release the locks.

On my screen an image of a 20 years old woman with Asian characteristics dressed in a sci-fi-looking black military field uniform with 2 small black horns on her forehead, natural-looking long pink hair tied into a ponytail, short pointy ears with black earrings, with tears sliding down her redish skins cheeks from her purple cat-like eyes ruining her gothic make-up appeared.

Drac I'm begging you don't do it...

I saw tears drip down to the ground in the simulation.

Hmmm...

I manually opened my helmet's security lock's with my hands making my helmet separate into 3 parts revealing my unhealthily pale wrinkled old skin covered in all kinds of numerous scars with black neural interfaces embedded in my skin looking like half embedded rings.

As I took off my helmet radioactive snowflakes landed on my white hair's top tied into a small bun with my sides and back shaven clean.

As I breathed in the unfiltered radiation-contaminated air I immediately coughed out blood while the skin on my face and my eyes started rapidly decomposing itself showing muscle that was already too starting to decompose.

Cough!Cough!Cough!

''Hmmm, I think I have tops 1 min thanks to my augmentations before my brain decomposes.''

I started chugging down the irradiated vodka until it was empty.

I felt a scorching fire spread out in my body from my stomach.

Cough!Cough!Cough!

I again started coughing out blood but now mixed with vodka and my saliva.

I wiped my mouth and leaned against the support beam but as I looked at my blood-covered hand I saw pieces of my skin and muscles on it.

I felt my senses getting dull and my mind fuzzy.

Ha!Ha!Ha!

I laughed in a burst of maniacal laughter as I let out all of my pent-up emotions which were suppressed inside my drugged mind all these years.

"It seems the vodka is already doing its job."

I thought while staring at the dust-cloud-covered sky.

It's so beautiful even though those clouds are half responsible for humanity's extinction.

I whispered while Genesis image with puffy eyes in my HUD view sat next to me and leaned onto my shoulder while hugging my arm and pressing it between her E-cup full and firm breasts.

''Hmmm... If only I could feel it for real although the sensation is being simulated in my brains by Genesis it's still not the real thing.''

''And if I was still the horny teenager and didn't have ED I would have a boner by now but after all, people change as have I changed.''

''From a horny teenager to an old man who is tired of living and wants to finally rest in peace.''

I thought in my mind while my decomposing jaw just fell off.

I leaned my head against Genesis and for a few seconds we just sat there in silence.

Cough!Cough!Cough!

This time I coughed out my already almost decomposed windpipe.

While barely managing to get any air into my lunges I once again looked at the night's sky live video feed which was being transmitted from surviving satellites directly into my brain.

As Genesis simulated the view in my mind because my eyes have already decomposed themselves.

Suddenly several burnings meteorites fell from the starry night's sky well more accurately its space debris of a space station that got finally sucked in by earth's gravity.

Gen if your wish could be fulfilled what would you wish for?

I ... would wish for us to always be together.

Hmmm...

Drac what would you wish for?

Me?... I guess id like to have a second chance at life ... I think ... yes that would be nice.

As I said that in my mind at this point almost all of my skin and muscles on my face have already decomposed with holes in my ceramically reinforced skull showing my brain with cybernetic implants starting to decompose too.

"So this is it huh..."

I took out a detonator from my webbings pouch on my power armor.

... if I'm going to die I'm gonna die with a bang"

As I said this I pressed the detonator and as I did in the distance inside the ground an undetonated ICBM's nuclear warhead that I repaired detonated itself creating a mini sun that instantly vaporized me and everything else in 1000 kilometers radius.

Edited 2022 April 22