13. Creation is hard

Writing is easy. Of course it is. Typing incoherent words on a screen is even easier, but whether they string together to make coherent logic flow and give rise to entertaining effect... that is a whole other matter.

Spelling.

It is easy to spell words if you have seen them used, have auto-correct and a dictionary if you know how to use a dictionary. If you have not seen them used, do not have auto-correct and do not even know how to use a dictionary than don't worry. At least you can still write and type. It's just that you may be the only one who understands what you are writing. Unless you are purposely mispelling for a character's voice and to irritate your readers on purpose.

Spelling is easy. Spelling if fun. Especially if you don't know whether you are using British English, American English, Australian English, any of the various English Pidgin languages, Chinglish, Singlish or Tamglish or any of the other English language combinations from a specific part of the world. Unless, of course, you are from everywhere around the world, in which case, never mind. At least you are still typing words on a screen or writing - wait. Does anyone still write stories by hand these days?

Oh look. There's a hand up. Ok. Some people still hand write some manuscripts. Not a bad idea for a first draft, to be honest. The only problem is when you have to type up those 100,000 words into a document, spell and grammar check and format it before your deadline tomorrow. Possible? Of course. As possible as when your project is due within the next hour but the computer has crashed, the printer has run out of ink and you really need some way to reverse time or you are going to fail your course and have to repeat the whole year. Never mind. You have the whole of your life ahead of you. What is another repeated year where you hoped you would have learnt from your mistakes by now but hadn't?

In short, writing or typing words with correct spelling are the easy part.

Next, grammar.

Side story. My grandma didn't have good grammar but that's because she couldn't speak neither English, her native national language, nor the national language of the country she was living in. What language did she speak then? The hometown's language of course. A dialect. What else could she do when during that time girl's weren't allowed to go to school, kidnapping your relative's children to further your own benefits was common, kidnapping girls and selling them to your enemies was as common as your enemies kidnapping and selling their enemy's girls to sell to their other enemies who weren't you (because you were somewhat more cultured with better morals), there were intermittent wars going on and the government didn't care about you. The occupying nation did, but only insofar as they could control you and make you do things for them. Your own government only cared for profits. So the moral of this story is that your lineage does not mean that you will have excellent or poor grammar. Don't judge a person by their face.

They don't teach much grammar in schools anymore. You learn more about it if you are studying a formal second (or third or fourth or fifth) language. Knowing those intransitives and imperatives and transient verbs have nothing to do with how good your language is unless you know how to correctly apply them to your text in order to create a paragraph that actually makes sense. Please note that the English of various English speaking languages or who have English as their nation's second language do not always have the same grammar. Nor does their logic flow in the same way. I learned this the hard way when a teacher told a friend from another country that what I had taught them was rubbish and my friend got mad with me.

Basically, if you want to learn grammar, go and read. Read lots of books of various styles. Preferentially those classic English literature novels that actually have good English. Read the old King James style English, middle English and explore the vast universe of the current modern English. There are so many good books out there and while many grammatical rules are debated, when unsure, choose a rule for yourself and stick to it. Stick to it like glue unless you are breaking the grammatical rules for a reason that definitely and purposely furthers the plot of your story or improves the atmosphere or voice of the story. Definitely don't do it for fun like I did at school just to prove a point to my teacher. There are pros and cons to showing off.

Humour and entertainment.

I should have bored you by now. If you are still reading, why are you still reading? I have purposely been jumping about without fully coherent or laminar logical flow, going wheresoever my brain has chosen to go. If you have have been able to keep up so far. Thumbs up. I applaud you silently. Or not. Because I have been kind. I have been playing a game with myself by trying to stick to high school level English vocabulary and style. Now, if I switched to King James English, Dicken's period English or academic English, I do not regret, I may lose a few people. But that's not what I've been trying to get at. Not at all.

Everyone has a different type of humour. No, I'm not talking about the four humours of Hippocratic medicine (although I could, just for the fun of it). I'm talking about what people think is funny. Because there's so many different things that people think are funny. Like dirty and clean humour. Light and dark humour. Corny and punny humour. Riddling and nonsensical humour (which I prefer because nobody can truly evaluate or understand it, even myself). There's toilet and slapstick humour. Prejudiced, discriminatory and racist humour. There's ridicule and scorn and malevolent humour. So many types of humour, but humans only have two humerus bones. One for each arm in fact.

Adding to the fact that each person's mind is a complex mash of who-knows-what that involves more factors than there are dimensional theories, writing comedy and entertaining or humorous prose (or rubbish, in my case), it is extremely difficult to write something that everyone likes and enjoys. It is also exceedingly trying to come up with new amusing topics when you are in fact a very serious person. The type that doesn't really joke around and is silent in most conversations. Yes, I'm talking about a wall flower that acts as an ornament and takes up space but otherwise doesn't get involved in witticisms because opening your mouth in a group setting is pretty close to mortifying enough to make you hyperventilate.

Wait! No. I don't have anxiety issues and I have no problems with public speaking as long as the topic is informative or evaluative.

The crux of the problem is that while people look at me as a creative person who has an abundance of flitting ideas, hundreds of story ideas, and bookshelves of random interesting information obtained from thousands of hours of research, I'm not actually as productively creative as I would like to be.

That is, creation is hard.

It's physically draining on my upper limbs and mentally draining on my mind. It is time consuming in the limited time of my day when money needs be earned in order to survive in this materialistic society.

So.

This little essay ends on a solemn and serious note because I have now run out of my tongue-in-cheek energy and slight sugar high. My comedic humour has dropped to an all time low because the energy stocks have not been doing well in the market of life.

So why write? Why pursue the impossible? That perfect piece of polished prose that shines no matter which way you look at it? Why spend so much time editing and smithing, deleting and rewriting?

Why? Because a good writer - a good author is not just a creator. They are a word smith who takes a pride in their work and only seeks to improve. Aims to be humble and is a student of the world. The world and its inhabitants are the teachers. They absorb the lessons and stories of the world around them to regurgitate them in a pleasant form. A form that is easily accepted and spread to and by the masses of readers where no one may have gone before and hopefully... hopefully, like all artists dream of, produce an unparalleled masterpiece.

Whether this chapter makes sense or not today, doesn't matter. Not today. Today, I am writing to get things out and frustrate the conundrums of the mind. To break past the oxymorons and contradictions of yesterday, today and tomorrow occurring within a non-existent paradox.

To be or not to be is a one question.

To write or not write is the other.

And when in doubt, dive in and disregard all fear. Fly free and just be who you want to be.

For the moment anyway.