WHAT IS IT

A week had passed with no word from Jack. I'm still at a loss for what to do. My mother kept asking me if something was wrong with Jack and me. I assured her that there was nothing wrong with us and that we were fine. I continued to go to school with only Charlotte and Ava. It was broken time one day, so I decided to buy a bottle of water, and I immediately saw Jack and as soon as he saw me. He stood up and began walking. I followed him and immediately grabbed his arm to stop him.

     "What do you want?' he asked as soon as he turned around and saw me.

    "What type of a question is that? You're the one who's avoided me for weeks. Did I do anything wrong?' I inquired. I was sick of waiting.

   He should simply explain what I did wrong to deserve this. Ignoring me and remaining silent will not solve any problems.

    "Tell you what,' he scoffed. "Please leave me alone.' He drew his arm back and resumed his walk. I dashed up to him and took a position in front of him.

     "You won't get anywhere unless you say something. Tell me, and stop being obstinate and acting like a child,' I yelled at him. I've been lonely without him; he's my best friend, and we've known each other for years. So he should just quit, stop everything, and be honest with me. I missed him.

      "You want me to talk, don't you? Because you're a liar and a cheater, that's why I've been avoiding you and not allowing you to get close to me.' He fixed his gaze on me.  

I was dumbfounded. What did he just say?

"What!!!

When he said those words to me, I was furious. "How and why the hell are you insulting me?' Did he find out about my secret with Haru, or did someone find out about it? I don't think so; it could be something else.

     "And why the hell did you keep such a secret from me?' he exclaimed.

    "What secret are you talking about, Jack. I'm sorry, I don't understand you,' I said.

    "You are sleeping with Haru, aren't you?'

   I'M DOOMED.

I was astounded. I had no idea Jack would find out. This was way too quick. This is one of the reasons I'm avoiding Haru; I don't want anyone finding out about us. This is going to be a disaster. Only God knows how many people find out if Jack could find out.

    "Why are you so quiet now that I've discovered your secret, Johan?" He frowned as he spoke. "I got angry because you kept such a thing from me and didn't trust me as your best friend," he said, rolling his eyes. "I became disgusted with you. I was suspicious because I had noticed the signs between you and Haru.' He said as he averted his gaze.

I was at a loss for words, so that was why he was upset with me. He was disgusted by me. I don't blame him; anyone would be disgusted.

     "What do you think of me, Jack?" was the next thing that came out of my mouth without any thought.

    "I'm not certain, Johan. That's why I avoided you to give me time to digest what I just saw...'

    "I see. And, what did you mean by suspicious?' I asked.

    "I don't have to respond to that.' He stated.

    "Well, I'm not sure what to say to you, Jack?" And that was the truth.

    "Are you in love with him?" he inquired bluntly.

   "What are you saying?" I inquired. What exactly is he talking about right now?

   "I simply asked a question. So, respond,' he said as he smiled at me.

   "I'm not in love with him; it's just..." I lowered my head when he interrupted.

   "What about Charlotte?" he inquired abruptly.

   "Charlotte and I are still in a relationship. Come on, Jack, let's just forget about it,' I grumbled. This is so humiliating and embarrassing. I don't even know what words to use to express how I feel. I don't want to admit it because I don't want him to find out. My secret, I'd like to take it to the grave with me.

      "Are you insane?' Jack almost exclaimed.

      "What, did I say something incorrectly? I just said, let's forget about it and not bring it up again,' I yelled angrily.

     "We're not going to stop talking about it, we're going to fucking finish it, Johan,' he yelled angrily as well. That's when I started walking, and he grabbed my arm and pushed me back.

     "I'm talking to you because you said we needed to talk, and I'm ready to talk now.' He shoved me up against the wall.

     "You said you were disgusted,' I said as I lowered my head. No. This was not the message I intended to send to him.

     "I was, but you're my best friend, and I have to live with that,'' Jack replied with a sigh and a roll of eyes.  

     "You'll despise it soon….'

     "Like a book, Johan, I know you very well. You'd like to deny it. You don't want me to know because you believe I will treat you unfairly and despise you. Okay, I'm not that kind of person, and I'll never be that kind of person. I know I didn't talk to you because I was angry, and I felt like I wasn't as important to you as your best friend. At the very least, I'm the first person you should consider telling it to.' He elaborated.

    "I predicted that you would snap and be disgusted with me. That is why I didn't tell you,' I admitted.

      "Nonetheless, I still snapped and became disgusted. When will I find out about it?' He began to laugh as he said this.

     "Stop laughing, it's not funny,' I said.

     "Come on, Johan, stop pouting.' He said, still laughing.

     "I'm not,' I said, and we both burst out laughing before he looked at me.

    "So, are you...?"

     "I'm still straight," I replied quickly. I knew what he was going to say.

    "Johan, you're not straight. I noticed how engrossed you were in kissing him. You couldn't even stop biting his lips?' He said this while winking at me.

    "Huh. How long were you staring?' I inquired, folding my arms across my chest and looking around to see if anyone was listening or watching us.

    "Nobody is looking. We're the only people here.' Jack stated.

    "All right,' I sighed.

    "Not for very long. 'I quickly left the door because I was getting irritated,' he explained

Then, we started walking towards the hall and realized that the Break time was over.

  "Hi, Johan?' We both turned and saw Haru.