59: HE WAS ALWAYS AROUND HER

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Mu Millie had big plans to expose her secrets she was waiting for the biggest business deal Feng Chou was going to make the whole family would attend the collaboration, the press and the whole country would be watching then she would give them one hell of present they would never forget? Mu Millie Just had to wait a few months soon it would her declaration for a war that she declares on the Feng's she would start by ruining their reputation, she was the deadly weapon that they are couldn't see.

But for now, she had a battle of her own to win it was thanks to Feng Chou that she couldn't get

past the stage of kissing and cuddling Mu Kai no matter how hard she tried she would end up in the spiral of never-ending fear of wanting it to work with Mu Kai, every time she closed her eyes while with Mu Kai she would freeze she somehow to feel Feng Chou touching her and doing the disgusting things he did to her. She would react with that thought in her mind and push Mu Kai away she was so grateful he never pushed her further she would never tell him to want she was screaming about she felt too embrassed to say the things she experienced she feared he would hate her for beings dirty women, she would scream inside so much She didn't know w how to get over this.

Feng Chou had done this to her, just when she thought she was over Feng Chou controlling her life the creep would sneak back like a slithery snake and bite her sending her into her turmoil. She would have nightmares that she was back there again sometimes when Feng Chou's was torturing her in this life most of her past life she couldn't block out the fear and disgust she felt so when Mu Kai touched her she felt she was too dirty for him, which was the reason she wouldn't let him near her. Not that she didn't want him she loved the feeling she got from him every time he touched her, but she didn't have the confidence to openly tell him this maybe he could have helped but she was too ashamed to say it out loud it was a dirty secrat she couldn't even share with her brother Mu Taichung.

Mu Millie knew one thing he would make that Feng Chou pay double of what she suffered. She was looking out and thinking of a solution maybe if she spoke to Mu Kai and told him what she experienced he would have a solution to get her out of this nightmare she was in. She lived happily on the outside but deep inside she always lived looking over her shoulder she always feared that she would lose all this happiness she had found.

Mu Kai walked in he saw her standing near the window in deep thought he walked up behind slid his arms around her waist rested his head on her shoulder and whispered:" it's beautiful isn't it want to take a walk after dinner" he kissed her neck slowly because he didn't know how she would react he was trying different approaches to see if he could get her open to him.

Mu Millie body felt his whole touch she tickled in places that she didn't even know she could, there was the same feeling in her abdomen area as always she knew what she wanting but him on top of her was the issue, she would close her eyes and feel like Feng Chou was there it freaked her out, that's she froze and tears would flow, and she would start to push Mu Kai of and many times he has got kicked in his groans she shocked her and surprised that they even worked now that amounts of times he has been kicked and punched by her. She always wanted more until they reach that stage then she would scream murder she let him nibble on her she liked it so much she didn't want him to stop and she owed him at least that much.

Mu Millie spoke:" hey Kai can we talk after dinner we can sit on the beach okay" she moved her neck so she could have some more of his amazing kisses.

Mu Kai saw her move her neck he knew she wanted him to continue until that certain point he was going to change tactics today so she better be ready for him, he also knew to protect precious jewel too that always ended up being tortured by his wifey. He was surprised she wanted to talk he wondered what about they talked about everything part from this dilemma they had he had become her best friend as well her lover, she even told him to want she had done to the Feng's and the Chan's he always paid attention when her eyes light up when she had done something bad and the way she giggles about it and hide in his chest like a naughty child, he loved this about her sweetness and innocent oozed out her.

There she was telling him how she crashed their computers or send a virus or blocked credit cards, and it was a very big crime for his naive wifey, compared to him who had just either torture someone or killed them she was sure the little sweet bunny he never wanted her to enter this world of his but deep down he knew she would have to step into this cold dog eat dog underworld he dreaded the day that would happen.

After dinner, they went for a walk holding hands along the beach it was a beautiful scene the sea crashed against the sand then retreated to hide then sneaking back to attack again Mu Millie could watch this all day it gave a peaceful mind she was distracted from her thoughts for a while.

They walked in silence it was awkward because Mu Millie was about to let a bazooka off she didn't know Mu Kai would take it would he find her disgusting and dirty after this? Would he leave her? Would she lose him forever? With these thoughts going through her head the fear of losing Mu Kai was kicking in her grip on Mu Kai's hand was also tightening she now didn't know if she wanted to tell him anything.

Mu Kai felt her grip tighten he feel she was shaken he was worried now what did she want to tell him that has her shaken like a leave. If this was the case he would rather not know he didn't want her to say she didn't love him anymore! or she didn't want him her life any more fear was gripping him inside?

Mu Kai sat on the seashore he gestures for Mu Millie to sit in between his legs which she did as she didn't want to see his face to see the reaction on it when she told him. She leaned back into his chest she always felt safe there like she was the cared for and loved but would change today?

Mu Millie:" Kai I want to tell you the reason behind me not wanted always go past a certain point when we are together and after that whatever decision you make I will accept it okay" she waited for a reply.

Mu Kai was relieved that it wasn't what he thought:" okay but I still let you know I am here to stay and I love you" he hoped that would help her to understand that she could tell him anything.

Mu Millie took a deep breath and told him from beginning to the end of her relationship with Feng Chou she also told him about Feng Jo too today she wouldn't hide anything she was laying her life and her love and happiness on the line either he would accept her with the flaws or he would abandon her like everyone always did.

She finished speaking the flood of tears had flown down to wet her white top, she was exhausted now she had lifted a great weight of her shoulders and landed on his he had to decide now what he would do she would accept her without questions? Or would he leave her? at first, she thought she could handle it and accept what update held in store but now she wasn't sure she loved him her heart hurt at the thought of losing him hurt her heart so much, she should least fight for him giving them a chance least but how?

Mu Kai finally broke the silence his voice was choked up:" I am sorry you went through all that in this life to I wished I could have stepped into saving you but I was held back I'm sorry I wasn't able to save you in your last life too I watched you in pain and couldn't help you I promise from here and now I will be by your side for always and forever as long as you will have me" he hugged her tightly he was scared after he revealed this she would leave him.

Mu Millie thought she heard wrong did he say last life was she there too! did he have a second life too with her! he has been here all along that feeling she would getting somebody close to her is watching but she never saw him in front of her she always thought it was her imagination that wanted someone to help her! Love her! She had to ask:" Kai was you there in my last life was you reborn too" she manages to get out of his grip as she turns to sound to face him.

Mu Kai looked into the sad eyes full of questions:" hmmm, I was there in your last life and the lives before that too I am so sorry I couldn't step in the one time I did you suffer 10th fold so I had to hold back until you contacted Grandpa Mu that's when I could step in" he looked at her tears flowed down like a waterfall it hurt him so much to watch he hated to see her cry.

Mu Mille had straddled him she didn't when but she was too concerned that he was reborn when she was and what does he mean other lives and he watched me suffer he couldn't stop why? even this life he watched from a distance why? :" did we have more life's than the last one and why didn't you stop the suffering? why didn't you help me? why did you watch while I suffered? I lived in hell every day and you just watched why?, why didn't pay attention I always felt you around you were always there why did I not see why was life so unfair to us why did we suffers so much I am sorry I didn't you sorry so sorry" she sobbed so loud she didn't care if someone heard she was heartbroken that Mu kai was always around why didn't she give in to her strong feeling and why does she brush it aside she wouldn't have suffered maybe Feng Loki would be alive today if she had just looked around clearly?