Chapter 19

"Why do always think of it that way?" Parker asked her while his back was facing her. "Personal experiences." "But I'm different. You can trust me." "Okay." "You don't believe me right now but when you will look back in the future I'll always be there. I'll be there in your happy and sad moments. I'll support you no matter what." Kayla just smiled at his words and then left for her home.

She was changing her clothes when her uncle called her to come downstairs. She quickly went downstairs and when her uncle saw her, he didn't spare a minute and started scolding her for not doing the chores. Usually Kayla didn't like to argue back because she thought that it only made things worse but right now at the moment she wanted to scream at her uncle's face for everything he had put her through and before she could stop herself, she was talking back to him. "Why?" "What?" Her uncle was surprised at her response. "Why do you keep doing this! What did I do wrong!" "This isn't -" "This isn't my home? I already know that! That's why I always put up with you! But not today. You know something? Even I don't want to live with you!" "Kayla don't raise your voice at your uncle. Is this how you show your gratitude?" Her dad interrupted her. "You don't have a say in this! Just shut up! It's all your fault to begin with!" "Don't blame me. Blame your mother!" "It's always that shit. Come up with something new! You always blame mom but don't you realize that you too had faults. And I'm not taking anyone's side here but you're just as messed up as mom. You don't care about anyone except yourself! If you cared about us then you wouldn't drink till you're wasted. You're nothing but a douchebag. I hate myself for caring about you when you didn't deserve it. I've learned to accept the fact that you're nothing but a fucking piece of shit. You're dead for me! I don't consider you as my dad!" Kayla stormed out of the house while shutting the door hardly behind her.

Kayla didn't know where to go. She was planning to go at Cosmos's house but she couldn't as she constantly kept on feeling that she was being a burden on them. She kept on walking and walking aimlessly till it was pitch dark outside. Kayla went to the nearest bridge and sat down until she felt a hand on her shoulder. "Excuse me miss?" Kayla looked up to see Parker's mother staring down at her. "Oh it is you. You're Parker's girlfriend right?" "No mam. I'm his friend." "Oh they're the same thing. So what's up?" Parker's mom sat beside Kayla and looked at her intently. "Nothing much mam. What about you? What are you doing here?" "Just came out to buy some cigarettes." "Oh." "You know something? There's something in life that you haven't witnessed yet." "And what's that?" "Self content and love. They're the best feelings in this world. So if you're planning to end it then why not first feel those things and even after feeling it, you still won't change your mind then do whatever you want." "What if I don't want to feel those feelings? What if I want to simply end it?"

"Child if there's something that I've learned from my life. It is that you can never simply end it. You might feel like you can in the moment but if you take a minute and think about it deeply then you will find that one reason to live. And you might think that that's easy for me to say but I've been through that phase too."

Parker's mom rolled up her turtleneck's sleeve and showed the scar to Kayla. "You're scar is really deep." "I know dear. I haven't told this to anyone. Not even to Parker but I think you need to hear this. I was raised in an orphanage because my birth mother didn't want me. But soon I was adopted by a family and that was the moment I felt truly happy. At first, they treated me really nicely but all it took was that one night to ruin everything. That night my adopted dad raped me and I was warned not to tell anyone or else I would be thrown out of the house. I was so young and scared back then that I obliged to his words. I thought it would only be that one night but it didn't stop. He raped me for four years but I never showed it to anyone that I was traumatized instead I kept on smiling but deep within I was dying. One day I tried taking my life by slashing my wrist but I was saved by my adopted mother. She yelled horrendous words at me for being ungrateful and trying to put her in trouble. I moved away from that hell when I turned 18. I was happy living by myself but then I met Parker's dad and he treated me like his queen. Everything was fine but then Parker's dad cheated on me and in that moment I was back to being my 15-year old self. I felt betrayed and depressed. I started blaming myself for everything but now I don't care about anything but me and my son. I know that your problems are different from mine but how about you try to use my solutions? Try living a carefree life and put your needs first. Trust me you'll feel so much better." "I understand what you're trying to say mam but I truly wish that you'd stop living like that." "What do you mean by that?" "Could you stop trying to bring different men in your life cause believe me or not Parker's really sad about it. I know that it's your coping mechanism for all the trauma that you've faced but how about you try to live for your son? Wouldn't that be better?" "You know you're way too wise for your age. I'll take your words into consideration." Parker's mom smiled brightly at Kayla and then hugged her. "I know that you might feel like your world is tearing apart but try living just this once. Try living for yourself and not for anyone else but just you." Kayla couldn't hold back her tears and started bawling her eyes out while Parker's mom gently patted her back to comfort her.