Insecurities

Shao Lin woke in the master room the next morning.

She reached out, searching for the body that kept her warm throughout the night. She remembered that after having sex with her husband, she had been too tired to stay awake. But she recalled that Long Yat-sen had cleaned her, dressed her, slept next to her, and now he was gone. She wondered where he was at the moment.

Shao Lin frowned, stirring out of bed to wash up, her flesh sore. She was still sensitive from the night before, and the reminder made her flush. She had done it with Long Yat-sen, and she had loved every second of it, already missing the powerful feel of his body in hers, craving for more.

Shao Lin wondered if it was normal to feel this strongly for someone. She thought what she felt for Zhong Bai in the past was solid. But with Long Yat-sen…it was different. It was powerful. It was addictive.

She figured that it was a good thing, considering she was married to him now. She would not have wanted anything different, anything less.

Shao Lin finished washing up. Then, she changed into the brand new clothes Long Yat-sen had bought for her and left the master bedroom, exploring the apartment. The floor-to-ceiling windows were closed off as they seemed to have some repairs being done.

She had the day off, so she went to eat a light breakfast and enjoyed some television. Afterward, Shao Lin continued to do some more exploring of each room. She was surprised that none of the doors were locked, but she had to remind herself that Long Yat-sen was different. He was not hiding anything. On the contrary, he was a good man. He had always been good to her.

Shao Lin began to feel bored around the time she would spend with Long Xia, so she called her. Her sister-in-law picked up.

"Are you busy?" Shao Lin questioned.

"I was just on my way home. Why? Is everything all right?"

"Yes," Shao Lin responded. "Yat-sen's not home, and I have nothing else to do right now."

"He's not there?" she said, disappointed. "Tch. He should have been loved up with his wife the entire day. I'm almost there. Meet me in my apartment."

Shao Lin then went to her sister-in-law's apartment unit, sitting by the kitchen island. Long Xia arrived shortly after, wearing thick sunglasses and a silver wig. She removed the wig but left the glasses on.

Shao Lin glanced at her sister-in-law, taking in her messy black hair, her pale face. "Are you…okay?" she asked Long Xia.

"Ah, yes," she answered. "I drank a lot last night, so I have a splitting headache. I also slept over at Bojing's place, but then I came home realizing I had to do some errands, so I went out again."

Shao Lin raised a brow at her, and Long Xia had realized what she had said. "Ah, I slept over at Bojing's place because I had been drunk. I did not actually sleep with him."

Shao Lin could not help but smile at her. Long Xia flushed, her teeth clenching. "When I woke up in his room, I wanted to kill him, but he told me he would never dare take advantage of me in a million years…unless I wanted it."

"Do you want it?"

It took Long Xia a moment to answer. Her expression was cold and stoic. "Maybe. If only he were less irritating and not a thorn at my side. But I haven't given the idea of fucking my brother's best friend too much thought."

Shao Lin sighed. She did not know what was going on between Long Xia and Yuan Bojing, but even she could tell that the attraction was there. She recalled when she saw them dancing together the other night, enraptured with each other the way Shao Lin was with her Yat-sen. She wondered if the two of them were ever going to give in, or would they continue to entertain each other with this pretending-to-not-want-the-other game.

"Enough about me," Long Xia continued. "How are things going on with my brother…other than him skipping out today?"

Shao Lin's cheeks flushed. At that, Long Xia smiled. "Ah. I'm glad it's like that."

"Is it normal?" she asked. "Wanting someone like that and badly?"

Long Xia chuckled. "I suppose. Physical attraction is something that comes easy, but for certain people, there has to be something more if you continue to want it badly once you have already tasted it."

Her sister-in-law spoke as if she was speaking from experience, but she wondered what she was referring to.

"What if it's not like that for him?"

Long Xia sighed, pinching the space between her brows. "You know, Lin. My brother devoted himself to protecting you many times over. I am certain he cares for you even if he can seem rather cold and indifferent…it's something most Long's share. But I think you need to establish some things with him if you are unsure about what he wants."

Shao Lin thought about it. "I should assert myself?"

Long Xia's smile widened. "Precisely. It would be best if you asserted yourself with him. Otherwise, he will never be open with you. Yat-sen is afraid of you knowing every part of him, the bad more than the good. So he would only show you what he thinks you only want to see."

Shao Lin chewed on her lower lip. "But I like…everything about him," she admitted shyly.

Long Xia smirked. "Then you need to affirm that with him, but take your time. My brother is strong and powerful, but I can tell he's insecure when it comes to you."

Shao Lin then stood up suddenly, determined. "I will then work on it!"

Long Xia looked at her with amusement. "He needs to put in the effort, too. If I find out he isn't. I will kill him. I mean the threat."

Shao Lin laughed as she threw her arms around her perfect, murderous sister-in-law. Long Xia hugged her back. "Now go and update me soon."