Bone Motherfucking Dragon

A motherfucking bone dragon!

How does one even beat something like that?

Not only is it huge as fuck, but it also has bony wings. Didn't see it at first, but it's there.

Bone dragon. Breath attack, claw slash, tail slash, and bite I'm guessing. Any of the previous moves an instant dead end for us. Can I resist it directly with divine energy? Perhaps. I could try to somehow aggro it. But what about the breath attack?

Probably poison or death energy. What if it has an instant-kill property? Plus it's bound to be AoE. Fuck this is the fucking worst!

I can try to aggro it, but will it even bother with me? I'm not even sure I can survive it, but my guess is my companions can't form sure. One small puff on us and it's the whole party that goes down.

"Fuck what now?!"

[I could try to aggro it while you guys rush in, but it could very well just ignore me except if I find a way to damage it.]

Yep, these bones seem sturdy as fuck. There is a reason bone armor is a thing in RPGs. Not only is it awesome looking, but it does offer some protection. Especially when you factor in that magic is a thing.

"That…I may have an idea for that. But it will take me some time."

[We can't just sit here. We need to keep moving! What's the plan?]

"Don't worry I can keep going forward, I'm no invalid. It will take me a while to cast but I have an ace up my sleeve. Same enhancement magic as before, but way stronger. I'll use my life force to fuel it."

[Wait, that's really bad what if…]

"No but! I'd rather lose some lifespan than have all of us perish here."

He's got a fucking point.

*RAWR!!!!*

We are out of time. Can't plan anymore. Moment to go all in.

[You guys keep pushing. Imma go and play with the big boy.]

*gasps*

"No way it is way too dangerous!"

[A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. Push forward. See you guys on the other side.]

I'm no hero. I truly do not want to sacrifice myself.

I really hope the other side won't be the afterlife. I don't remember ever dying. I do remember past lives. But not dying. Death scares the fuck out of me.

Surprisingly I'm not shaking that much.

[Actually, there is something I need you guys to do.]

Can't believe I almost forgot about that. Would have been a grave mistake.

"What is it?! We'll do it whatever it is…!"

[Keep the beat going. What we were singing earlier. Keep it going.]

"T-that …sure. HAHAHAHA!"

Yep, can't have an epic fight without epic music. That's like that wars in the stars franchise. There is no sound in space. But you can be fucking sure they made every spaceship shot resonate.

I can feel my blood boiling. Spirit as its peak. Time to fucking do this.

[Look here, you big-boned bastard! Imma fuck you up really bad!]

Is it conscious? Is it acting instinctively? In either case, it turns toward me. Oh god, it's huge.

In its empty eye socket the same red glow as the moon.

It shines through the darkness of this world. Piercing straight to the soul, at least that's the feeling I'm getting. Of course, it's probably me overthinking. This thing is but a pile of bones. A really fucking scary pile of bones. One that can move, claw and swipe around too.

It takes a step forward and throws its head at me. I side-step it skillfully, naw joking. I throw myself on the fucking ground in the least gracious way possible.

But I do avoid it.

*Swish*

And that's a fucking tail swipe. I couldn't even fully get up that I'm throwing myself on the ground again. I slide under it dragging my body across the ground. Is this a fight of fucking limbo?!

It raises its front paws high up before bringing it all down at once. The ground cracks. I manage to fit right in between 2 claws. My whole body is shaking, not just from fear this time around.

I need to figure this shit out.

Alright, think...fucking think.

How do I get out of this?

Think back to all that training you fucking did with the sword.

No, it won't be enough. I'm far from such a creature's match.

This will take all my knowledge and skill.

I need to dodge.

I need to read the pattern.

The more the fight progresses the more I realize I might have a chance.

The beginning is really bad, but the dragon doesn't seem that smart.

It alternates between basic attacks and more basic attacks. But like it does these attacks with all its body parts.

At some point, it even slams itself to the ground trying to crush me under its weight.

The more the fight goes on the more I get used to it.

Still, I wish I had my own Pleiades to off it quick. You know some chain dragon lightning and this sucker would be history.

Here I am rolling around like a moron all over the place. This reminds me of that Darker soul's game. Fighting some oversized boss roiling all over the place holding to dear life.

Meanwhile, at least my allies are going strong. Well, slow but strong. They are keeping the background music up.

So here I am rolling on a sick beat.

Okay, this might be a bit embarrassing.

I need to figure out the perfect timing to counter-attack.

It does take me a little while to reach full weapon enhancement power sadly.

Otherwise, I could have already gone on the attack.

But then again, slow and steady wins the race as they say.

I'll slowly, ever so slowly chip away at its health.

There is one thing I have going for me at least.

This dragon has no fucking clue what friendly fire is.

Skeletons all around me get crushed whenever they try to approach the battlefield.

Sometimes I even use their backs as springboards to dodge the big guy.

This is going better than I expected. At this rate, we will be safe and sound and nothing will….

*RAWR!!!*

What now?

I can see it slack its jaw. Opening its gargantuan bony mouth wide.

There I can see some sort of dark energy slowly forming into a ball.

It looks concentrated.

It looks powerful.

Motherfucking breath attack incoming!

Take cover!!!