Prologue

I didn't want to do this. I didn't want to be here. When I jumped from the tower, I thought that will be the end of it. I thought I'd be able to sleep forever. Life wouldn't hurt me anymore. Hunger wouldn't bite me anymore. Pain and I will finally end our friendship. Suffering will finally leave me in peace. Loneliness will have someone else to influence.

But that did not happen. Well, it did, but it didn't last. I felt peace. I felt death's warm embrace. I felt at home. The shadows comforted me. The silence soothed me. I couldn't feel anything, and I was okay with that. Because I was so tired of feeling. I was so tired of feeling flattering feelings of love, joy and the permanence of pain, suffering and futility.

And death took that me. He stole that from me. And I thought he'd keep it. I thought he'd keep my insecurities, my pain, and the tiny dots of joy I thought he'd keep it all. But he didn't. He gave it back to me. No warning.

Pain greeted me first, like an old friend. I cried out, wriggling as something held me uncomfortably by the rear end. The light blinded me with its happiness as it shined down upon me. Do I look like I want you, light? Put me back in the shadows where I belong...

It was so disorienting, being alive again. There were whispers, mutterings, snarls and growls. The light, annoying as always beamed down at me, and I blinked repeated;y, making it worse. A guttural voice shushed them all. Finally, something blocked out the disgusting light. His face was dirty and grimed, his hair, was unruly kept and his facial hair in knots. His eyes were a disgusting piss yellow. He sneered at me, his elongated yellow canines dripping with saliva as I am lowered into soft hands.

I was greeted with a beautiful face I was raised again. Her face was soft but finely kept. Her hair was dark as a raven's feathers, and her lips were red as roses. Her eyes were a vibrant blue that moved like waves of a forgotten time. Her hands, gentle but firm held me up to her eye level.

I didn't know it then, but she was the embodiment of the sea. She was Thalassa, my mother. And She was as beautiful as the moon kissed sea.