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Chapter 6 - Monster

129 AC

 

The Twentieth Day Of The Seventh Moon

 

Kingslanding

 

I made my way towards the royal sept, accompanied by Ser Arryk Cragyll of the Kingsguard. Behind the royal sept stood a long keep with a slate roof and tall, intricately carved doors. This keep would one day be known as the Maidenvault, and it currently housed the daughter of the Rogue Prince.

 

Guarding the keep were knights of House Hightower, ensuring that she would not escape.

 

As I reached the doors, they parted to let me in. Upon entering, a septa bowed before me. "Prince Jaehaerys," she said, and I motioned for her to leave.

 

In the distance, I saw Rhaena, looking forlorn, her eyes red from crying. She turned towards me, barely concealing her contempt. I did not blame her, for I had killed Lady Jeyne Arryn, her grandmother, who must have been dear to her. She hated me for it.

 

"I am ready," she said tersely as she rose. She was wearing a green gown, chosen by my grandfather for her presentation to the court. He believed it would be best for her to wear that color.

 

 

We made our way towards the Great Hall, where the nobles were gathered alongside my brother, the king.

 

I was clad in my bronze armor, wearing my helm as well along with my new valyrian steel sword.

 

As the doors of the Great Hall opened, I walked ahead with Rhaena following behind me. The nobles gasped at the sight of Rhaena in my custody.

 

On top of the throne sat my brother, wearing the crown of Aegon the Conqueror with Blackfyre in his hand. He looked every bit the king as he sat on the Iron Throne.

 

Near the base of the throne stood the Kingsguard, alongside my brothers Aemond and Daeron, and the Hand of the King, my grandfather alongside the members of the Small Council

 

I removed my helm and bowed before the throne.

 

"My king, I have returned," I spoke out loud. This was the first time I was presented to the court after the death of my father; only my brother and his advisors were aware of my true mission and what all I had accomplished along with the fact that Rhaena had already been present in the Red Keep for the past moon but her existence was hidden.

 

"House Stark has pledged their allegiance to you," I said.

 

"House Arryn, who had pledged their loyalty to the false claimant—our sister—has been dealt with. The new lord of the Eyrie supports your claim to the throne," I continued.

 

"Our bastard nephews have been dealt with as well, and I have brought the daughter of the Rogue Prince, Princess Rhaena, so that she may bend the knee to the rightful king of Westeros." I said this, knowing it was a facade; in reality, she was a hostage, a crucial piece against our uncle, Prince Daemon Targaryen.

 

"My brother Jaehaerys, you have indeed made me proud," he said.

 

"Your actions in the North and the Vale have been crucial for the war between me and our half-sister, who falsely claims the Iron Throne for herself," he said.

 

"You were instrumental in getting rid of our bastard nephews as well as the Queen Who Never Was," he added.

 

"For your actions, I wish to bestow upon you your knighthood," he said, eliciting gasps from the crowd.

 

He descended from the Iron Throne, and I bent my knee as he placed Blackfyre on my shoulders and recited the vows, which I repeated.

 

I felt utterly unworthy of a knighthood. Knights were meant to protect women and children, yet I had done the opposite, killing every man, woman, and child who dared rise against my family.

 

"Now rise, Ser Jaehaerys Targaryen, The Silent Fury," Aegon said with a grin as I stood up.

 

Maegor had been sixteen years old when he received his knighthood; I was two years older than him. He was called the Cruel. I wondered what they would call me.

 

Aegon turned towards Rhaena, a glint passing through his eyes. Whether it was contempt or something else, I could not tell.

 

I locked eyes with her, and then she bent down.

 

"King Aegon, you are the one true king of Westeros. It is you who should be our king, not only because you are a man but because you are wise and just. My betrothed, Lucerys Velaryon, was a traitor, and so was my grandmother. I hope in their deaths they acknowledge their mistake of supporting the wrong claimant," she said, her tone devoid of emotion, though I could tell she was barely controlling her voice from breaking.

 

"I hope that the mercy you have shown will be extended to my sister, brothers and my father," she said, and my brother smiled.

 

"Therefore, I pledge my allegiance to the one true king of Westeros," she said.

 

"I accept your oath of allegiance, Princess Rhaena," he said.

 

"If only your father would be as understanding as you are," he added with a mocking tone, as everyone knew there was no way the Rogue Prince would bow down to Aegon.

 

 

Then Aegon turned towards the nobles and proclaimed loudly, "Tonight there will be a feast, a feast to celebrate the success of my brother's endeavors and our securing of the Iron Throne," he said, and the nobles cheered.

 

The knights escorted Rhaena back to her chamber as Aegon and I moved towards the Small Council chamber.

 

After everyone settled down, Aemond spoke up.

 

"Jaehaerys, I have to commend your abilities, brother. You killed three of our bastard nephews on dragonback, along with that old bitch with our help of course. Truly a commendable achievement," he said, as Aegon and he snickered.

 

Daeron pounded his fist on the table.

 

"Aemond, do you think Jaehaerys's actions are something to be laughed at?" he shouted.

 

"Jaehaerys, what have you done? You have become a kinslayer," he said, his eyes wide with horror at my actions.

 

"There were ways we could have settled the matter of Succession peacefully, but the path you chose has led us all to needless slaughter," he said, visibly distressed.

 

"The day our father chose our sister as his heir despite having four living sons was the day this war started," I replied. "I just lit the match; the pyre was already set, brother," I said softly.

 

"Enough of that, Daeron," Aegon interjected.

 

"Now that we have some time, can you tell us of your journey, how you brought the Vale back into our fold, and took care of our bastard nephews?" he said with a grin.

 

I took a deep breath before recounting my tale.

 

I told them of my journey north, how Cregan Stark and I agreed to terms regarding the New Gift and how he pledged his loyalty. I mentioned the Pact of Ice and Fire and the agreement that Sea Dragon Point would be developed with financing from the crown and operated by the crown.

 

Then I recounted my battles with Jacaerys, though it was more a one-sided massacre than a battle between equals. I told them how I found him flying in a desolate landscape and how my dragon and I flew over him without his knowledge before Vermithor finished both the dragon and its rider.

 

The grins on the faces of my brothers were expected, but the look that Daeron gave me was one of derision.

 

"Jacaerys never suffered, for he had a quick death," I said solemnly.

 

"What did you do with the bodies then?" Aemond asked me.

 

"I gave him a funeral worthy of a dragon rider," I said, remembering Vermithor's flames turning Jacaerys's body into ash.

 

"What about the Vale, brother? I'm really curious to know how you ended up turning the Vale to our side as well as gaining a Valyrian steel sword," Aegon said.

 

"Grandfather and I were in contact with House Royce as well as Eldric Arryn. We told them that we would support a rebellion against Lady Jeyne," I said.

 

"But then how is it that no news of this rebellion reached outside the Vale?" Tyland Lannister asked.

 

"The majority of the lords and ladies of the Vale were in the Eyrie. After I killed our other nephew and his dragon, I destroyed their forces near the Gates of the Moon and took control of the Eyrie thus leading to this news not escaping the confines of the Eyrie," I said.

 

"The majority of the lords surrendered, though a few resisted. Among them was Ser Corwyn Corbray," I said, remembering his death by my hands. "He insulted you, brother, so I slit his throat and gained possession of Lady Forlorn, the Valyrian steel blade of House Corbray," I said.

 

"Lady Jeyne was not easily subdued. I told them all what would happen if they defied the king, but she did not listen, so I kicked her out of the Moon Door," I said coldly as Aegon and Aemond started laughing, Aegon even shedding a tear from mirth.

 

"You murdered a highborn lady, Jaehaerys," Daeron spoke out.

 

"She was a traitor," I replied softly.

 

"What has happened to you, brother? Since when did you start treating life so callously? I hear you talking about murdering men, women, and children with such ease," he said, his voice filled with horror.

 

I just listened, feeling numb from all the pain I had caused.

 

"Daeron," Grandfather spoke. "You are in need of some rest after the journey you endured to leave Casterly Rock and reach King's Landing," he said. Daeron understood it was a sign to leave, but not before looking at me one last time. I saw pity, compassion and righteous anger in his eyes.

 

I felt a deep sense of melancholy, the weight of my actions bearing down on me as I recounted my tale. The laughter of my brothers echoed hollowly in my ears, a stark contrast to the numbness that enveloped me.

 

"And now, thanks to your wonderful plan, we were able to finish off two more dragonriders in the Battle of Rook's Rest," Aegon said, a smile on his face.

 

"The one-eyed bastard really thought he could defeat you, brother," Aemond added.

 

"I distinctly remember seeing the bastard and his dragon falling from the sky after you dealt the finishing blow," Aemond said, laughing.

 

"Do not forget, brother, how that bitch had a smile on her face as Vermithor tore her dragon's neck," Aegon said, laughing at the cruelty I had dealt.

 

"Although, brother, I do not understand why you did not let us bring their heads on spikes back to King's Landing," Aemond said callously, while the other members of the Small Council showed discomfort.

 

"Foe or friend, one does not disrespect the dead, brother," I said in a monotonous tone, my eyes fixed on the map spread on the table.

 

"Bah, I would have loved to see the whore on Dragonstone's face when she received her son's head as a gift as well as the expression of the Sea Snake seeing his wife's head," Aemond said with a malicious grin.

 

Their laughter and cruel words seemed distant, like echoes from another world. I felt detached, the weight of my actions pressing down on me, numbing me to their jests. I was surrounded by my brothers' mirth, but inside, all I could feel was emptiness because we had won the battle and not the war.

 

I looked towards my grandfather, and he gave a curt nod.

 

"Everyone other than my grandsons may leave, as the Small Council meeting has ended," he said. The others got up and left, soon leaving only Aemond, Aegon, Grandfather, and myself in the room.

 

"Jaehaerys, you may be wondering how the war is progressing," Grandfather said, and I nodded.

 

"Our forces in the Reach have taken care of the traitors supporting Princess Rhaenyra," he said.

 

"Just as you predicted," I understood from looking in his eyes.

 

"Lord Unwin Peake has suppressed the rebellion of House Tarly, and the only other house that remains defiant in the Reach is House Rowan," he said.

 

"Aemond you may continue," he said, looking at my brother, who then spoke up.

 

"My good-father, Lord Borros Baratheon, has gathered his forces at Storm's End and dispatched a part of his forces near the Dornish borders in case they start raiding the Stormlands", he said.

 

"Jaehaerys, he loved your idea to build a fort in the Dornish Marches and give it to me to rule," Aemond said.

 

"Cassandra is with child as well," he added, and my eyes widened.

 

"It seems I will become a father," he said with a rare smile.

 

"I am happy for you, brother," I said, though my voice lacked emotion. Something was wrong with me.

 

"The Rogue Prince is the only thorn in our side," Aegon spoke up. "The bastard has been gathering the Riverlords and has defeated House Bracken while simultaneously taking Harrenhall."

 

"The Velaryons have maintained a blockade of the Gullet as well," Aegon continued.

 

"The Iron Islands have not made any moves as of yet," Grandfather said.

 

"So, what do you suggest we do, brother?" Aegon asked, looking at me as I studied the map.

 

"The Triarchy," I said softly. Aemond and Aegon looked confused until Grandfather spoke up.

 

"The Triarchy has agreed to help us defeat the Velaryons and the Rogue Prince, as hatred still simmers in the three sisters due to the actions of Corlys Velaryon and Daemon Targaryen in the War of the Stepstones," he explained.

 

"Brother, you really have planned everything, have you not?" Aegon said, his eyes widening with genuine surprise, and so did Aemond.

 

I just looked at Grandfather. "When do they expect to attack the Velaryons?" I asked.

 

"Ninety warships, commanded by Admiral Sharako Lohar of Lys, swept from the Stepstones under the banners of the Three Daughters, are bending their oars for the Gullet and will attack in the next moon," he said with a satisfied grin.

 

"During this Battle of the Gullet, we will attack Dragonstone and end our sister and her line once and for all," I said, as a twisted smile came on the faces of my brothers.

 

"Daemon will not stay still, as the news of our victories will have already reached his ears," Grandfather said.

 

"We will feed his pride and give him something to be distracted with," I said.

 

"He will be making moves to invade the Reach," Grandfather said.

 

"The Riverlords will not wish to invade the Reach if their own lands are getting invaded from the west," I said.

 

Confused looks came over my brothers' faces.

 

"Grandfather, Send a raven to Jason Lannister and order him to invade the Riverlands, and tell him that a dragon rider will accompany him in this invasion. Daemon will go to burn the lion and be content with that victory," I said.

 

"But he will receive no dragon rider, for we will be attacking Dragonstone. The fool will just be content with our word and will meet his end by the Rogue Prince, buying us enough time to finish our sister and the Velaryons", I said.

 

Then I looked at the faces of my brother and grandfather.

 

"You intend to use the Lannisters as bait," Aegon said incredulously.

 

"They have received a royal match, and by now our brother's wife should be with child as well. Let Jason Lannister pay for the match between our brother and his daughter with blood," I said in a cold tone.

 

"You truly are diabolical, brother," Aemond said with a grin.

 

Their praise and shock were lost on me. I was calm, detached, devoid of empathy. The weight of my actions bore down on me, yet I felt nothing—no remorse, no regret. Just the cold, calculated resolve to see our enemies fall.

 

"Is there anything else to discuss?" Aegon asked, looking at our grandfather.

 

"No, your grace," he replied. Aegon clapped his hands.

 

"Very well then, brothers, get ready for tonight's feast. We will drink, eat, and fuck to our hearts' content," he said with a grin.

 

"I will be fine with just drinking, brother," Aemond said.

 

"Do not tell me you are scared of your wife, Aemond," Aegon said, laughing.

 

"You clearly do not know how terrifying Cassandra is, brother," Aemond replied, both of them laughing.

 

I stared into the hearth, the flickering flames casting shadows that danced mockingly. Their laughter felt distant, hollow, as if coming from another world. A world I no longer belonged to. I wondered how long it would be until I was the one consumed by the flames.

 ------

The feast was in full swing as wine flowed freely and the nobles danced to their hearts' content. The bards played their songs, filling the hall with lively music, and the looks on everyone's faces were filled with joy.

 

Aegon was having a drinking contest alongside Aemond and Daeron, who they had forced to join their endeavors. All three of them reveled in the merriment, their laughter and cheers echoing through the hall.

 

The weight of my actions pressed heavily on me, and the numbness that had taken root in my soul grew colder, more suffocating. The joy my brothers found in the evening's debauchery was lost on me. All I could feel was an overwhelming emptiness, a void that no amount of drink or victory could fill. As I watched the revelry unfold, I felt more isolated than ever, a silent spectator to their exuberance, haunted by the shadows of my deeds.

 

I was seated next to Rhaena, who also seemed uninterested in the feast, her grim expression betraying her thoughts.

 

Then Aegon, already drunk, got up from the table where he and my brothers were drinking and approached Rhaena.

 

"Care for a dance, princess?" he slurred, the smell of wine heavy on his breath.

 

Rhaena gave a polite nod and accepted his hand. They moved to the dance floor, where the nobles gave them space.

 

I watched them dancing, noticing that Aegon was barely able to control himself. He looked ready to fall at any moment, and the expression on Rhaena's face was one of barely hidden disgust. Then I noticed him trying to grope her.

 

"Jaehaerys, the king has had enough," Grandfather said with irritation, and I understood my role.

 

I got up from the table and walked towards them. "Brother, it seems you have had your fill. Let's taste the food that has been prepared," I said.

 

"I am fine, brother," he insisted, starting to dance more vigorously with Rhaena. I placed my hand on his shoulder to stop him.

 

"Brother, I insist," I said firmly. He gave a gruff nod and let go of her. I noticed a bruise forming on Rhaena's hand as she tried to maintain her composure.

 

"Brother, you are seriously too grim sometimes," Aegon said as I guided him to a chair. "You should smile a little," he added, slurring his words.

 

"Ser Criston, look after the king," Grandfather commanded. The Lord Commander of the Kingsguard then escorted Aegon to his room.

 

"There are times I wish your mother had been stricter with your brother instead of indulging his behavior," Grandfather said, his tone heavy with frustration. "He acts as an oaf."

 

He sighed deeply, his eyes reflecting a mixture of disappointment and weariness. "If only he were more like you, Jaehaerys," he said, placing a hand on my shoulder. "You remind me of your namesake. He was a great man and a great king."

 

A small, sincere smile appeared on his face. "There will come a day when I will no longer be in this world, and when that time comes, you will be the Hand of the King."

 

He then handed me a small box. "Here, I have something for you," he said. "Inside are the letters your sister sent you. Alyssa wanted to write every day, but Alicent made her send just one a week," he added with a chuckle.

 

"Are you not pleased, Jaehaerys?" he asked, noticing my lack of reaction.

 

Before I could respond, Rhaena approached the table, her eyes cast down. "Lord Hand, I wish to retire for the night," she said softly.

 

"You may leave, Princess," he said. "Prince Jaehaerys will escort you back," Grandfather added, nodding toward me.

 

I stood up, taking the box of letters, and began to walk Rhaena to her chambers. My movements were mechanical, my thoughts distant. The weight of the letters in my hand felt inconsequential compared to the heaviness in my heart. As we walked in silence, the detachment I felt from everything around me only grew stronger, a numbness that seemed to seep into every part of my being.

 

We approached the keep where Rhaena was staying, and as we entered, the septa bowed before me.

 

I was about to leave until Rhaena called out to me. "Prince Jaehaerys," she said, and I turned to face her.

 

"I wish to speak to you in private," she said, and I gestured for the septa to leave the room.

 

"I wish to thank you for what you did with your brother," she said softly.

 

"My brother was not in his right mind. I apologize for his behavior towards you, Princess," I replied, my voice void of emotion.

 

She seemed a bit surprised by my detached response. "I wish to ask you something," she said, her violet eyes searching mine.

 

"Did my grandmother suffer?" she asked, barely holding back her tears.

 

"She did not, Princess," I said. "Your grandmother was a valiant and brave woman, and in her last moments, I saw a smile on her face." I wondered if that was what it felt like to die—to experience a fleeting moment of joy in the face of inevitable oblivion.

 

"Thank you," she said, tears streaming down her face.

 

I stood silently, watching her cry for the person she had loved dearly, a person I had killed. I walked towards her and handed her my napkin, which she used to wipe away her tears.

 

"I apologize for my behavior. It was not ladylike," she said after a few moments, having somewhat composed herself.

 

"It is understandable, Princess," I said, my tone as cold and distant as ever. "Grief is a heavy burden that one should not carry alone."

 

She looked at me with a mix of gratitude and sorrow, but I remained a distant figure, untouched by her emotions. My actions had created this pain, yet I felt nothing—only a hollow emptiness that consumed my soul.

 

"My betrothed, Lucerys, always spoke of how he hated you and how he would make you suffer. I remember seeing the hate he had in his eyes," she said, her voice trembling.

 

"But when I look into yours, all I see is a man who hates himself, a person bearing his burdens alone. I see a man broken from the inside," she said, gazing at me with what seemed like a mix of pity and compassion.

 

I took the box of letters in my hand and handed it to her, and she looked at me, perplexed.

 

"It contains the letters sent by my sister," I said. "I want you to keep them with you."

 

"Why me?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

 

"Because you are the only one who knows how it feels to spend time apart from your twin," I said, but I knew it was a lie.

 

I couldn't read the letters Alyssa sent. Rather, I didn't want to read them. If I did, I would lose my focus on what was important. No, it was because I would break, and I couldn't afford that. I had a mission to accomplish.

 

Rhaena looked at me with a depth of understanding that was almost unbearable. "You don't have to face your demons alone," she said softly.

 

But I shook my head. "I must. There's no other way."

 

The weight of my words hung in the air, and I saw a flicker of something in her eyes—perhaps a realization of the dark path I was on. I didn't need her pity or her compassion. My fate was sealed by the choices I'd made, and in the quiet moments, when I was alone with my thoughts, I wondered if I had the strength to continue. Or if the end, swift and merciful, was the only release from the torment I'd brought upon myself.

 

In the end, Alyssa deserved someone better than me. Not a monster like me, but someone kind and caring. All I did was bring death and pain to everyone. The people I had murdered in cold blood. The children I had turned into orphans. The husbands I took away from their wives. The people I had burned. The look of desperation on young Joffrey's face when I killed him. The look of hatred on Lucerys' face as he died. The face of Jacaerys, not knowing his end had come until it was too late. The voice of despair from Jessamyn when I pushed Jeyne from the Moon Door. The screams of men, women, and children as they cried out in unison. The utter mountain of corpses below my feet.

 

Every face, every voice, every scream haunts me. I saw them in my dreams, heard them in the silence. Alyssa deserves better than this haunted, broken man. But this is my burden to bear. This is my penance for the monster I have become, no for the monster I always was.

 

And perhaps, in the end, the greatest tragedy is not what I have done to others, but what I have become myself. Trapped in a cycle of violence and regret, I have lost the person I once was no who was I kidding it was just all an act for Alyssa for I could never run away from my past.

 

The darkness inside me felt more suffocating than ever. I didn't know if I could survive the Dance of the Dragons. And perhaps, deep down, I didn't want to.

 

Monsters are not born from the nurturing they receive; they are forged by their own nature.

 

Deep within my heart, I always knew I was destined to be a monster. And in every story, the monster inevitably meets its end.