4 A Child Can't do Everything

It felt like eternity before we finally left that party. Apparently, one can't leave until the host declares it's over. Really, the customs of this world are very confusing. I'm starting to wish I paid more attention in history class.

Although, I'm starting to wish I never left the party. The people in this world travel via carriages instead of cars. I've never gotten sick riding in a car before, but for some reason, carriages make me want to vomit. Perhaps it was because there was too much bustling movement. Up and down. Side to side. I think I even smacked my head at one point. In all of the drama's I've ever watched, it always seemed like a smooth relaxing ride.

It was a lie. It was all a lie. Thanks Hollywood.

When we arrived at what I assumed was my house, I really wanted to kiss the ground.

How can we live so close and yet so far? God d*mnit. Remind me to set that carriage on fire. I'd rather walk.

After kissing the ground, I looked up and saw another castle.

Oh sh*t. Is this really my house? Sure, it wasn't as big as the palace we were just at, but this was still very huge.

Suddenly I had an urge to set it on fire. How dare you be better off than me b*tch a** Seri?! Ah. I shouldn't be too angry. After all, old money must be nice. Now that I think about it, they must have expensive furniture inside. Teehee. Perhaps I should just pawn some sh*t and start a new life.

I felt someone grab my ear firmly and begin to drag me with them. I screamed in defense, "Ouch! Let go of me you f*king wh*re!"

My mother clicked her tongue, "I have no idea what got into you, but I will be d*mned if I let you talk to me like that. I've never been so ashamed at a social gathering in all of my life!"

"Really? That's surprising."

I felt her smack the back of my head. Surprisingly, the back of my head twinged with pain.

Why's this b*tch so forceful with her own daughter?! Oh, you fat a** b*tch. I will have my revenge.

She tossed me into a bedroom. She snarled, "You'll be grounded in your room until you come to me for forgiveness."

I rubbed my ear, "Yeah, I wouldn't hold my breath."

"Hmph." She looked at the butler who was bowing at her side, "If she manages to get out, beat her with a stick 50 times." She slammed the door shut and I heard it lock.

"50 times?! She's a godd*mn madman! How the hell did you survive with her, Seri?!"

I stood up and brushed myself off. Oh well. That's not important. Let's see what I can use in this room.

Sure enough, this was Seri's room. It was decorated with old girly items. Where did they even get all this stuff from? The f*cking trash?

As for any entertainment, there was none. The only books she had on her bookcase was schoolbooks.

Yeah, I don't need to learn addition and subtraction again. Ugh. All she has is math, grammar, and history books. I hate all of these subjects. Why doesn't she have anything fun to do?!

Okay, plan B.

I tried to open the door and realized it was locked. I began to bang on it, "Let me out b*tches or I will burn this place to the f*cking ground!"

No one answered. Fine. I will just beat the door down. I charged at the door and attempted to ram it with my shoulder.

"Ow! F*CK! B*TCH! That hurt!"

I tried kicking the doorknob repeatedly, but made no progress. I collapsed on the ground gasping for breath.

What the f*ck? What is this?! Mahogany?!

Okay. Plan C.

I went to the window and opened it. I peered out and quickly jumped back inside. Wow. That is high. How many floors does this place have?! I would definitely not survive a fall like that.

Okay. Okay. Let's be calm. Oh! I know! You can tie blankets together and escape that way! Thanks again Hollywood!

I tied my bed sheets together and tossed it out the window. Hmm. Well. Yeah, that won't work. Apparently you need more than a few blankets in order to make a long enough rope. Even if I climbed that down, I would still die on impact. Thanks so much Hollywood.

Okay. Plan D. Enjoy your grounding.

I plopped on the bed. Hehe. I haven't been able to nap since I was a kid. I suppose I should enjoy this.

Staying true to her word, my mother kept me locked inside the room. She came in expecting me to cry and beg at her feet, but instead I flipped her the bird.

I refuse to do a cute act for this b*tch.

When I wasn't sleeping, I decided to work out. Might as well do something productive since I can't sleep constantly 24 hours a day.

I can't believe how weak this body is. I can barely do one push up!

In my previous life I worked out constantly. Not because I wanted to be strong, but mostly because I would get fat easily if I didn't. I also had to watch my weight and what food I ate.

Please, God of this world. Give me a body that could eat anything without getting fat. I've never asked for anything before (lie) so please just give me this one thing.

Alright, prayer time over. Let's just go back to sleep.

I woke up to an unfamiliar face dragging me out of bed. I clung to the bed refusing to wake up. Too early. Too early. Just leave me be.

"Little Miss. Why are you being so difficult this morning? If you don't wake up in time, you won't be able to have breakfast before school."

What? Breakfast? School?

The maid sat me down in a chair in front of a mirror. She began to brush my hair. I blinked sleepily at my reflection.

You know, now that I think about it, Seri isn't that bad looking. She has fluffy semi curly light brown hair that flips out at the end. Her eyes reminded me of peaches.

I'm a bit jealous. I wouldn't say I was uglier in as Leia, but Seri is good looking in a different way. She definitely has potential. Maybe I just didn't notice her beauty in the novel because she was always described as a mouse hiding from everyone. So naturally, I just assumed she looked like a mouse.

After the maid finished my hair, she quickly dressed me. She pushed me along to the dining room. I noticed that there was only one plate set.

The maid spoke to me, "I'm sorry little Miss, but your mother won't be joining you."

I sighed in relief, "Thank heavens." I quickly began to eat the delicious food in front of me.

Oh my gosh. Why does this food taste so good I want to cry?! Perhaps I will cry. But first.

"Maid, where's the coffee?"

The maid blinked at me, "Coffee?"

"Yeah, you know. Espresso. Life in a cup?"

"No, Miss. I know what coffee is. I just don't know why you're asking about it."

Okay, now I'm getting upset.

I answered impatiently, "Because I'd like to drink it."

She shook her head, "The miss is too young for coffee."

"What. I'm 26 and run on caffeine."

"No. Little Miss is 5. You should be old enough to know your own age. You can drink it when you're older."

F*ck. Life is misery. How will I survive this world?