24 The Diary
"Baby, my love for you is killing me. You are in my thoughts, my nights, my mornings, your picture is engraved in my eyelids because every time I close my eyes I see you. You are the light of my eyes. "
"Your eyes are calling mine, your hands are holding mine and I hear your whispers in my ears... but then I wake up and everything in my life evaporates when you disappear."
"Love is torment in men's hearts. Love is a flower in women's hearts. Love is a myth in broken hearts. Love is evil and painful."
" If love was words, all the pens in this world would have finished, but love is souls. So is my soul enough for you?"
The true blood stopped writing and quickly closed his diary when he felt Ian who was resting his head on his shoulder is waking up.
"Have we arrived?" That was the first thing Ian said when he finally opened his eyes. The true blood smiled lovingly looking at his sleepy face as if he was his world...
He really is Blade's world,
The blonde alpha looked at the other male in confusion when he found him looking at him like that, but he smiled and asked "What? Why are you looking at me this? Is there something on my face?"
His questions made the younger male return back to reality and faked a smile saying "We have arrived."
The older male raised his gaze looking outside where he found the buses stopped in front of a huge forest.
Blade was extremely anxious because he was trying all the time not to show Ian how he feels towards him and just a moment ago he got lost looking at his face like a fool.
And that is why he stood up and quickly got off the bus.
Ian furrowed his eyebrows in confusion looking at Blade who was running out of the bus.
He was going to follow him when he noticed the beautiful dark red diary on the floor. He bent down and picked up.
While on the other side, when Blade left the bus, he immediately went to stand beside a tree alone thinking of how idiot he is.
"I don't want to lose him Edalb. I know he sees me as his friend, but at least I can talk to him. I need to hide my feelings better. " He whispered inside his head to his wolf Edalb who answered him saying { You did not do anything. You just looked at him, he probably thought that you zoned out or something. Also, he will never expect that you love him that way}
Blade hummed thinking of what his wolf said to him "Yeah you are right Edalb. I love you." The wolf giggled saying "Tell me something I don't know."
Before Blade could even say something back to his wolf, he was interrupted by a hand that was placed on one of his shoulders from behind.
He immediately turned around facing the person who tapped his shoulder which was nobody other than Ian who said calmly "You dropped your diary in the bus"
Do you know that feeling of when you cheat on an important test and the teacher catches you cheating? Or the feeling of when your naked pictures get published on the internet and everybody saw your naked body?
This is exactly how Blade felt when he saw Ian holding his diary and it was not any diary, it's the diary that he uses to write his feeling for Ian.
He wanted to run away and hide under a rock for the rest of his life or he even wished that the ground under him crack and bury him inside.
He felt like everything was exposed.
He was not scared of being exposed because if he was, he would not have told every single person he meets about his love for Ian.
He was scared because he did not want Ian to know about his feelings. He knew that Ian will never accept a true blood as his mate also, he most likely thinks like everybody that the mating between two male alpha is impossible.
He knew if Ian got to know about his feelings, he will lose him and his friendship for the rest of his life.
He can't let this happen, he can't go back to how he was, he can't go back to love Ian from far away.
His body started shaking and his face became paler.
Even though he was standing in front of Ian who was holding his diary, he felt like he will be executed and now he is standing in front of the hanging rope.
