The Obituary of John Arvin

I QUIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm tired of this shit!

Every second is painful, yet nobody seems to notice my pain. All they see is me lazing around not knowing that I'm struggling. Must be because I don't look like someone in pain. Everyday is a struggle. I can't land a permanent job because I can't focus on my work because of the pain. I can't land my dream job of being a tech support because I can't speak fluently. I keep stuttering no matter how many hours i spend practicing.

I may have been cursed. Nothing I do becomes successful. I'm losing my self-confidence everyday. I don't even have someone to confide to. All these burden, these hardships that I endure, I keep it bottled up inside me. Because I know, the moment I spills all these, is the moment I'm already on my deathbed.

They said "No man is an island" , but i feel like a debris floating in the middle of the ocean with no land in sight. Is it because I can't open up to someone? Last time I did, instead of helping me mend myself, they just made it worse.