How to Cope

Noble knew it was a long shot. The Other's Voice had a very small range, which is why the government had been willing to sell it to Fort in the first place. How in the world would it be able to communicate across worlds? 

It couldn't. 

Feeling a new wave of loneliness, Noble finished the meal with minimal conversation.

She learned to eat quickly once the plates were served, and eventually felt the comfort of her belly being full. 

'An empty comfort, but better than nothing.' 

At last something sweet was served, and Noble and her entourage were dismissed. The walk up the stairs to her room was a somber one. 

'Blaze and Brock will be in bed by now. Honey–no I haven't called her that in a while–forgive me, my sweet Rainy.' Noble longed to apologize in person. 'I'm sure Rain will be beginning her nightly routine. Not that any of my children will be able to sleep. I'm sure Fort has seen what happened on the news...My darling Fort. I wish I could tell him I'm still alive.' 

Tears stung Noble's eyes. 

"What is wrong?" Counsel had reached the top of the stairs and now looked at her with concern. "You look a little faint. Are you ill?"

"I am not sick. It has just been a long day." The professor blinked the liquid from her eyes. She looked at her chamber door. "If you will excuse me."

Counsel rubbed the back of his neck.

"What?" Noble could feel the man's tension.

"It isn't that I do not trust you. But your outings into the wilderness have become quite frequent. Up until today, I assumed it was just to defy your aunt and to make me chase you, but now…" Counsel's eyes darted away.

"Now you are afraid I might actually run away and not return." Noble finished the thought.

When Counsel had thought Brenna was playing a romantic game of cat and mouse, he was more than happy to let the woman slip through his fingers just so he could track her down.

Perhaps he and Brenna had had a romantic tryst outside the walls, though Noble doubted it. He was far too quick to accept that she loved another.

And now that Noble had rebuffed his confession, Counsel had every right to fear that she would disappear in the night once and for all, abandoning him to pick up the pieces. Her absence would not only cost him his job but likely his life as well.

"Leaving you alone seems unwise." The man nodded slowly.

"If it puts your mind at ease, I promise not to run away tonight." Noble laid her hand on her heart. 

"That is good. But still. I will rest easier if Kosi stayed with you this evening. I know he will keep you safe." Counsel dipped his head. 

It was a welcome suggestion. Of everyone in the palace, Kosi was currently the one Noble trusted the most.

Counsel might have been worried about her getting out, but the professor was far more concerned about anyone who might try to do her harm while she slept. 

And she desperately needed sleep. 

"We can give it a trial run this evening. If all goes well, then perhaps we can make it a more permanent arrangement. For your comfort and peace of mind, of course," Noble added. 

The professor wasn't sure who Kosi belonged to—if he belonged to anyone at all— and she did not want to steal him. 

Counsel's face relaxed. "It would lessen my worry. Keep her safe and inside the palace tonight, Kosi." The last part was added with an unapologetic smirk. "Her Majesty's orders." 

Noble bristled slightly. She had nearly forgotten that the Queen had put her under house arrest. And for something that had happened before the Nightmare even began.

'So much for the Spell being fair...'

"Goodnight," Noble said as graciously as she could. 

The door to her room swung open as Lenore dipped a curtsey. Did the girl just have good timing or was she listening from the other side of the door? It was most likely the latter. 

Working quickly, Lenore and Pen helped Noble out of her dress and into her nightclothes. She felt like a child, but let them do their work in peace. It would have taken more work to explain that she wanted to do it herself than to passively stand like a mannequin. The only preventative action she took was to hide her wedding ring on the string in her hand, careful not to let the servants see.

Noble's eyes closed slightly as they worked.

She was tired of talking. She was tired of playing a part that the Spell had chosen for her. 'I'm just plain tired.' 

Yet when the door finally closed to her bedroom, sleep was not her immediate concern.

First, she had to figure out how to do it safely. With a couple of windows in the room and a rough ceiling, Noble would need to lash herself to something to ensure she remained in the room unharmed. That would take a little engineering.

Kosi looked on with curiosity as the professor scoured her wardrobe for any sashes she could find. Braiding many of them together, the professor created a makeshift harness for her waist.

It was similar to the one she had in Ender's Deep.

'That will work. Now where exactly do I attach it? I don't want one of the servants wandering in here in the morning to see me floating.'

Kosi curled up beside the bed, spinning a few times before collapsing in a furry heap.

"Sure, it's easy for you…you can touch the ground!" She grumbled.

Kosi looked at her with his big intelligent eyes and tilted his head to one side in question.

Noble clicked her tongue and scratched behind the creature's ear.

Even though he was dangerous, Noble was beginning to think of Kosi more as a puppy than a monster.

She had always wanted a pet like people had before the dark ages. Of course house pets were generally unable to tear people limb from limb and eat them whole, but that was just a detail, right?

"You said you'll keep my secrets, remember?" Noble said in a sing-song voice.

Kosi purred and nodded in response. He leaned his head against her hand. It was so soft to the touch!

"You are even more comfortable than the bed would be." Noble stroked Kosi's head. "Actually, I don't suppose you would let me…"

The professor cut the thought short. It was crazy!

But the Symncus seemed to understand anyway. He stretched out and rolled to one side. There was more than enough room for her to lay down amid the soft fur.

"Are you sure?" Noble held up the cord. "I would have to tie myself down. It probably wouldn't be comfortable."

Kosi sniffed at the rope and then laid his head down unconcerned.

'Was that a yes?'

Noble decided to try her luck. The golden creature allowed the harness to be tied around his body, even patiently holding still while she braided more cord to make it the right length. Then Noble snuggled into Kosi's fur and lashed herself to him.

'At least I should wake up if I hit the ceiling or drift off…' she comforted herself.

Kosi's breath became soft and even. He obviously did not find her presence uncomfortable.

If Noble were honest, the Symncus was the most comfortable thing she had ever laid on. She should have slept almost immediately because of how tired she was.

Yet it didn't. Her mind was racing with a thousand different thoughts.

But one topic permeated and wrapped around all the others. It was a question that Noble needed to answer. And soon.

'How am I going to conquer this nightmare?'

In the darkness, she began to form a plan.