Introduction

Picture a 5"7 dark haired carmel complected kid, lanky with no sign of muscle and eyes as lifeless as television turned to white noise. Garbed in clothing that says, i like daft punk, do you? You got the image? Well what you're picturing is most likely exactly what i look like.

Hi i'm Reed, a clinically diagnosed sociopath and high functioning autistic 17 year old. Does that mean that i want to cause chaos and destruction and bring society to it's knees as i laugh maniacly from the comfort of my at home office, equipped with a custom built rig decked out with 16 GB of ram, intergrated graphics processor, a fuckton of storage and more OS the the word Delicious in spanish!? Well of course it does, but only sometimes.

The time i don't spend as a keyboard warrior terrorizing the internet, i spend it in search of beautiful women. To be more specific what i'm really looking for is beautiful women with even more um.... beautifuler feet. That's right i'm a foot fanatic. One who has a proclivity for sucking phalanges of the pedis region. Go on, throw rocks if you dare, but know that my foot worshipping brothers and I will come back like a hurricane that the meteorolgist originally perdicted would stay on track but, they were wrong! And it veered off track and touched down in the pacific and became a cold torrential tropical storm filled with sharks. Yeah thats right buddy! a Sharkicane and we'll tear ya to pieces.

But...."aheemm" i digress. I've recently come across the most interesting discovery whilst browsing through one of my most trusted information networks i.e. 4chan. It really is quite remarkable how much valid information one can recover there. Quite the remarkable discovery indeed i tell you. ready? imagine the most gorgeous pink rosy toes you ever saw, beautifully sculpted meta tarsal bones and legs smooth and curved with a delicate complexion. Looking at this photo i immediately knew. It was love at first sight.

So of course i did some digging. Got the frame stamps and tracked the ip to a small town in West virginia. What?? Of course i don't thinking i'm going overboard. You know what they say. Toes before bros and everything else in between. Well anyway, i contacted the person who posted the photo. He says he'll sell me the original phisical copy. So i did what any sane human male would do with his mothers visa mastercard. I bought a round trip ticket to Kenova, West virginia.

Well here's the thing. Guy says its a top secret, confidential, hush hush, kind of deal so i gotta cover my tracks. But it can't be that serious. How much should one man go through to get a original copy of the feet of his dreams. These feet are seriously perfect guys. I'm already going out of my way to meet the guy, and i don't do well interacting with other human life-forms.

Anyways...