The Heartbreaking Past and The Inevitable Future

Chirping bird sounds, a warm yet refreshing breeze and bright sunlight filled up the room.

Almost perfect morning but Alice has a throbbing headache when she opens her eyes. The warm sun is shining brightly inside the room made it impossible for her to ignore the headache that crushing her skull.

"Ah!" she grunts and massages her temple. It is worsening due to the the bright light from the open window curtain so she gets out of bed and walks towards the window to close the curtain.

Alice doesn't have a clear memory of what happened after her talk with Gabby nor of how she got back to this room but she decided to just shake it off her system since her migraine or whatever it is she's experiencing is worsening just by trying to think.

She's still wearing the same clothes she was wearing last night.

She grabs the edge of the curtain and pulls to close it but it won't budge. One of the rings got stuck on the metal tube so she decided to unstuck it but it was too high for her.

Alice looked around and saw a small stool tucked under the bedside table. She quickly headed towards the bedside table and bent over to grab the stool when she saw the note on the table saying, "Heard you had a hard time falling asleep last night so just take your time and rest. If you're too hungry to sleep, come and join us at the cafeteria. Love mom"

She let go of the stool and straighten her back. She grabs the note and looks at the wall clock above the headboard and it is already 8:30 in the morning.

"8:30?" she mumbled to herself then looked at the note again and then back to the wall clock.

"Augh!.." she groans and lets herself fall face down back to bed. "I want to sleep more…" she complains as if she's a child who was forced to go to school early in the morning.

Alice stayed in that position for a minute and then went to the bathroom. She brushed her teeth in front of the lavatory with her eyes staring at her hideous haggard reflection in the mirror.

Her eye bugs are all super dark and huge, her skin is dry and flaky, and her hair is a mess.

She made herself decent-looking and then headed down to the cafeteria to join everyone for breakfast.

The air is clean since it is located in the suburban part of the city and you barely hear the noises you commonly hear in the city streets. The nearest neighbour is about a mile away and barely even makes a sound either.

Walking inside the orphanage's wall has a different feeling during the day than at night. Everything is so warm and relaxing during the daytime and lonely and depressing at night.

The orphanage has a very vintage design that was influenced by Spanish colonization.

Huge stones are piled together to build the walls that haven't been touched by any colouring chemicals ever since it was built. The windows are so huge that you can actually stand on its ledge and enjoy the view on the other side of the fence and breathe in the fresh clean air from the nearby field. While the huge window panes are made of small shells that are locally called 'Kapiz'. The floor is also tinted with the history it witnessed over the years.

The second floor of the building is made of Narra wood as well as most of the floorboards that create a creaking sound when you step on it but the ground floor is made with huge blocks of marble that are nearly impossible to crack even if you drop a hammer on it.

Alice lays her palm on the rough textured wall as she walks through the quiet hall.

There are also a lot of things that change in this place that weren't part of her childhood but most of the things that can bring her back in time are still present.

This very hall is where she used to play hide and seek with her grandmother every weekend when she and her mom dropped by for a visit.

This house witnessed how her grandparents built their family.

Their legacy.

Every inch of this place is built with a strong and everlasting love that becomes a legend of the town.

This house became a home for a very long time for a lot of people.

This house was also the one that witnessed the love story of a young Fil-Am bastard and a young maiden.

Alice's dad and mom.

Their love story begins when the young Vincent Madrigal comes to their doorstep together with his mother and starts working there as a maid due to the recommendation of her cousin who works as a nanny of sweet, young, innocent Lily.

As expected, the young man is very hard-working even though he is not asked to do so. He helps his mom with the housework that he can do on her behalf, not knowing that he is being observed by the man of the house.

One day he asks the young Vincent to join him for a stroll on the land and asks him to hold the flowers he's going to pick from the field for her wife in exchange for money for his service. The boy agrees with enthusiasm.

For weeks the boy assists the man on his stroll and picks wild flowers for his wife that she will carefully arrange in a vase to decorate the house.

"So, what is your plan for the money I'm paying you?" the man asks the boy while he rummages at his black leather wallet for some bank notes for the kid

"I was planning on saving enough money to help my mother. I want her to stop working like a slave for someone else." He said with innocence and determination.

The man just nodded and blindly got a paper banknote from his wallet, "Here."

The young Vincent rounded his eyes in shock when he saw the paper banknote in front of him. He really doesn't know how to count no even have any knowledge about its value but he knows that paper bank notes are more valuable than coins.

The master moves his hand that holds the money gesturing the boy to get it since the boy seems astounded.

"Ah... I'm sorry sir." The boy apologizes and accepts the money. His eyes glow with happiness as if he received a gift from Santa Claus himself. "Thank you so much, sir," he said and met his master's eyes. "I will not put this to waste," he added

The man smiled, "I know you won't." he agreed and got down to his knees to level with the boy, "You are still a kid and the future holds a lot of good things for good kids such as yourself. Life is tough and it will get tougher as you grow old. I am afraid, no matter how hard you work, you won't be able to help your mom or free her in this kind of job before she withered."

Vincent's eyes were filled with horror and tears started to welled up as he heard those harsh words from the man.

"But I know a way you can fulfil your dreams and more." the man added, "You wanna know what it is?"

The boy nodded without hesitations, "YES! Yes, sir, I want to know."

The boy's tears started flowing like rainfall, remembering his mother's hardship for as long as he could remember while giving him a faint warm smile as she tucked him into the bed at night. Those nights he heard her mother quietly groan in pain due to the whole day of hard work and the days that they got kicked out from one place to another because they didn't have enough money for the rent.

The boy's knuckles whiten as he clench his calloused yet small fists, "I want to help my mom, sir."

The man extends his right arm to pat the boy's head, "Use that money and buy yourself a set of school uniforms and papers to write on."

The boy blinked in confusion and looked at the man straight in the eyes, "You want me to spend it, Sir? I don't understand."

The man smiles, "Go to school and study," he said. "You need to learn how to read, write and count."

"If I study and learn those things, will I be able to give my mom a good life?"

"Yes," the man nodded, "And the harder you study and the more knowledge you gain the better life you'll have. You can be rich."

The boy can't hide his excitement about the future, "Really sir? I can be rich just like you?"

"Of course. Even richer."

"Then I will buy uniform and papers and pencils now so I can be rich quickly." he declared and quickly turned around and ran to his oblivious mom busy cleaning the kitchen, "MOM!" he called as he ran to her.

As his master instructed, the boy enrolled into a public school and studied hard. He was more determined than any kid in their class since he had a goal set in front of him.

He was able to excel in class that he was accelerated from kindergarten class to second grade over the course of one school year.

His master's sweet daughter becomes his classmate and eventually becomes his rival.

They are rivals not only in school but also in Lily's old man's heart.

Lily noticed her father's special treatment towards Vincent ever since he asked the boy to join him in picking flowers for her mother.

That was formerly Lily's job.

From that moment on she got this eerie feeling towards Vincent even though Vincent doesn't feel the same about her.

Years have gone by in a flash.

The man of the house died of old age while his daughter bloomed like a vibrant flower on the first day of spring. The grimy boy becomes a clean and handsome gentleman.

Just like in a movie or very cheesy romantic novel, the two rivals become lovers and Lily's father might have predicted that from the very start because he wrote Vincent's name on his 'Will' under the condition of marrying Lily.

It may sound absurd to ask your only daughter to marry a man with no penny under his name but it did happen.

More years went by for the couple and they were blessed with a beautiful baby girl. They are the picture of a perfect family tied with love but not everything is as good as it seems.

Turns out, Vincent has a very weak spot when it comes to ladies and fleshy contact.

He is a sex addict.

That's why most of the time, Lily walks out of their house and goes back to her parents' which already become an orphanage under her mother's supervision.

The young innocent Alice doesn't know what's happening. She was told that her grandma wanted to play and misses her that is why they visited there and stayed for a couple of days.

One day she saw her mother lying on the floor with a bleeding wrist. For a toddler to witness such a horrifying scene sure scarred her.

Everything went crazy fast for Alice after that incident until found herself living in a faraway land with her dad's mom whom she called 'Memaw'.

Her almost-dead mother's image is stuck in her head which keeps her awake every night.

Her parents got separated.

Her mom managed the orphanage after her grandmother passed away while her dad became a successful businessman.

Both of them are nearly impossible to reach and seem to carry on with their own lives, leaving Alice at the centre of it all.

Alice halts and takes a deep breath to remove the heaviness of her chest after having a playback in her head. She is now in front of the cafeteria's entrance.

"People here eat breakfast at exactly 7:00 because 8:00 is time for chores," Alison said when she noticed Alice then carefully placed the dirty dishes in the basin.

Alice entered the room.

She heard Alison grunt as she lifted the basin full of dirty dishes. "That looks heavy. Let me help," she said and walked towards Alison then held the other end of the basin.

"Thanks" she smiles.

They both bring the dirty dishes back to the huge kitchen that is covered with white vintage tiles most of which have cracks and faded color.

They carefully place the basin down on the floor.

Alison starts unloading the dishes from the basin and places them on the huge metal sink that is already filled with soapy water.

Alice did the same.

"You don't have to." Alison stops her

"It's OK. I insist."

"But you're a guest," she protested. "Guest shouldn't do chores, besides, you haven't eaten breakfast yet."

Alison tried to grab the dishes from Alice's grip but she won't let her.

"But I want to help," Alice insisted. "You know me. I don't eat breakfast" and smiled playfully

Alison snorts because she knows that Alice can't make it through a day missing a meal; not even a snack.

"Fine!" Alison surrendered with a giggle, "But this is mine, just go there and mop the floor instead."

Alice straightens her back and salutes like a soldier, "Aye, aye sir." she says then laughs

It took Alice a while to mop the sticky floor of the cafeteria. It is not an icky kind of sticky. It is just sticky because some crumbs fall on the floor mixed with spilt beverages here and there.

Good thing that Alison lent her an apron to wear because her clothes would be soiled if she didn't.

Alice dumped the dirty water on the sink outside the cafeteria near an old shed and turned on the faucet to wash the mop and the pail she used.

Doing housework isn't foreign to Alice since she lives with her Filipino grandmother in New York and her Memaw always says that housework is not for maids. Maids also called 'help' are only for helping with the extra chores but it is the homeowner's job to do the housekeeping.

Alice even learns how to earn money at a very young age by babysitting her neighbor's kid or doing some side jobs after school because her Memaw told her that if she desires something, she needs to work for it so that she could appreciate the value of money she's going to spend.

"Hey there beautiful." said a manly voice behind Alice while wrapping his arms around her.

Alice felt her blood run cold and her mind just went blank. She dropped the mop head that she was scrubbing and let out a loud hiccup.

Meanwhile, the clueless Gabby felt the sudden muscle tension in the person in his arms that he thought was his girlfriend, Alison, so he loosened his hug and turned the poor girl around.

He leans forward to greet his blushing girlfriend with a good morning kiss on her lips but what he saw was Alice's blushing face. "Oh shit." he blurted and automatically remove his hands from her. "I am so sorry. I thought--" he wasn't able to finish what he was about to say.

He got choked out as the memories of last night flashed in his head.

Alice started uttering her sorry for causing a misunderstanding because of the apron she borrowed from Alison but none of those words sinks in Gabby.

He was distracted by her red lips moving as she spoke as if he was being hypnotized by them. Again.

The spell breaks when Alice drops her head down because of the embarrassment of stuttering with an explanation that makes no sense at all.

Gabby composed himself and tucked his hands inside his pants pocket to hide his trembling hands.

"You don't have to say sorry. I am the one who came out of nowhere and pounced on you."

Alice shake her head, "But I sullied you."

Gabby got confused, 'is she talking about last night?' he thought to himself. 'Sullied me? Isn't it a bit too much? I mean, yes she started the kiss but sullying me is a bit exaggerated. Is she talking about me kissing her back because of Alison? Shit! I should clear things up!'

Gabby's internal monologue halted when Alice approached him and handed over a clean handkerchief.

"I ruined 2 of your shirts already." Alice mumbles

Gabby looked down and saw the brown stain on his white polo shirt.

"Oh, so this is what you mean by sullied?" he mumbles.

He cannot help himself from smiling when the realization hits him.

"I thought you were talking about last night" he added and took the handkerchief from her hand and started scrubbing the stain off his shirt.

"Last night?" Alice repeated while staring at him innocently. She even blinked twice while trying to recall the event that he might be referring to but all she could recall was the time she gulped her milk while having a serious conversation with him on the swing. "Did I spilt something on your shirt last night too?" she asked in curiosity while praying that she didn't because that would be a huge disaster. She might as well pop like a balloon because of embarrassment if that happened.

Gabby waved his hands and saw her watery eyes. "Ah. No. No, you didn't.... You haven't spilt anything on me last night," he reassures her.

He can't help himself to smile seeing her like a puppy begging for something.

"But you said you thought I was talking about last night so I--," Alice wasn't able to finish when Gabby's eyes met hers when she lifted her chin.

Alice quickly averted and tried to compose herself.

"You don't remember anything last night?" Gabby asks

Alice looked up to think and unconsciously tilted her head as a sign that she didn't know what was he talking about. "Nope," she said then some glimpse of memory made her gasp.

"Do you remember?" asked Gabby anxiously

"Did I just..." she choked because of disbelief

Gabby was holding his breath waiting for what she was going to utter.

"Collapsed?" she blurted out in shock

That isn't the thing Gabby was expecting or waiting to come out of her mouth so he can't hide his disappointment.

Alice's face glows bright red and drops her head with a frowned expression.

"I'm sorry."

Gabby waves his hands in panic, "Don't apologize. You did nothing wrong." He even made his voice more cheerful than it should be to comfort her.

"No! It is not OK." she protested. "I have bothered you in so many ways." She started counting with her fingers, "I puked on your shirt, ruined your trip, and modded your shirt, again!" she rumbles then drops her shoulders with a sigh.

Alice is not as confident in front of others to begin with and that trait magnifies when Gabby is in the picture.

Tears started welling up in her eyes because of frustration.

"I don't even want your attention or anyone else for that matter and yet here I am with my clumsiness and ignorance," she mutters while holding back her tears from falling.

'Why do these things always happen when he's around? I am so pathetic!'

She already has an idea of what was the answer to that question but she will not going to entertain it. At the end of the day, she knows that this sprout of feeling she has for Gabby that keeps on fighting its way out will never be reciprocated. Ever.

While Gabby on the other hand is also having the same dilemma of sort.

'Why did you have to ask her about last huh, Gabriel? For Pete's sake! Now look at what you did. You should be thankful that she didn't remember! It'll be more fucking awkward than it already is if she did!'

Gabby collects all the courage he can muster and breaks the awkward air that envelopes them. "Well, if those shirts upset you, you could just buy me a new one," he said hoping that it'll help cheer up Alice

Just thinking about Alice's shallow tears made Gabby melt for some reason.

Alice flips up her head and looks at Gabby with dilated shiny eyes which catches him off guard. He can feel his face burning.

He cleared his throat and avoided her gaze, "A-and if it makes you feel any better, you could help me with my chores. I mean with the food preparations while you're still here," he said. "Well, if only you want to." He added

"Are you kidding? I'd love to." She beams a smile on her thin heart-shaped lips.

Her fascination with food kicks her embarrassment away as if it was nothing.

"As long as you won't feel indebted to me and besides, it'll be truly awkward if we start to ignore each other while being in the same circle of friends," he added

"Well, we've been doing that for quite some time," Alice teased

Gabby laugh.

Alice felt the huge rock from her chest suddenly get lifted thinking that Gabby was right, it'll be awkward if they start ignoring each other because of some trivial matter. She also thought that it would be easier to sort her feelings if she started to see him as a friend.

In time she might just be able to avert her feelings like what she did with Bryan.

***

Three days pass by like the wind.

Alice starts to cope with life in the orphanage. She was able to sleep at night and woke up as early as 3 a.m. to help with the food preparations with Gabby.

Alice learns or should I say discovered a lot of things about Gabby by working with him. First, He bakes, he cooks, but he is not an expert with knives.

He sucks at it so Alice ended up doing all the knife works.

Second, he loves meat and despises green vegetables.

And thirdly, he loves baking.

She had never seen that sparkling smile on him before. His eyes are sparkling with joy and his lips stretch up to his ears only surface when he bakes.

"Wow! It is so pretty for eating!" exclaimed the little girl when she saw the Lilo and Stitch-shaped pancake on her plate.

Then the other kids started filling in line to get their pancakes.

Alice felt the overwhelming joy of seeing the kids' reactions as they received their plates.

She got motivated to make the food more beautiful every time.

"Good work partner," Gabby whispered from her side.

He started calling her 'partner' the other day when they single-handedly invaded the kitchen since the nuns and the kitchen staff could not cope with the bizarre techniques they were using in making the food.

Alice averted from his closeness and busied herself on putting the finishing touches on the plate of pancakes in front of her. "Well, the aesthetic isn't as important as the taste. So technically, it is your food," she said and handed over the plate to the little girl with short hair in front of her.

"Well, making it look delectable makes it tastier," he disagreed and put another freshly cooked pancake on the tray beside Alice.

She nonchalantly grabs a couple of pancakes and places them carefully on a plate and starts painting a picture on it with some edible paint and frosting.

"Are you sure about the course you've been taking? If you asked me, it seems like you like cooking more than computing numbers on spreadsheets and preparing business plans on a computer."

"Well, 'like' is a bit understatement. I love baking but I don't have the resources for that so..."

"You're smart. You can apply for a scholarship and sponsorship."

"Yeah, but not in the school I wanted."

Alice tilts her head and looks at him, "Do you like the University that much?"

She finds it odd to enroll on a school you wanted to study about something you're not interested in.

"Not really," he replied, "but Alison is in that school so I needed to be there. I want to be with her."

Alice felt a prickling bolt in her chest hearing how head over heels Gabby is to Alison.

She's fully aware of his feelings towards Alison but it still pangs hearing it straight from his mouth.

"All my life, I always looked after her and when she left to study in Manila, that's when I realized that I could not live without her," he confessed

As much as she wants to react positively to his confession, Alice just ends up smiling awkwardly.

Good thing that the headmistress approaches them before everything between them becomes awkward.

"What a marvelous food yet again," Lily smiled

"That is a bit overstatement Miss Lily" Gabby protested with the same grin

"Well, just look at those beaming smiles," she said pointing to the kids eating with gusto.

Gabby and Alice can't make an argument after seeing the kids.

Alice can't lie, she felt warm inside while watching those kids enjoying and bragging about the food they were having.

Seeing them made her remember the lonely days she spent alone in New York. Yes, she had her grandmother but having a brother or a sister feels much better than being the solo kid in a large house.

Alice's lonely thought is put to a halt when Miss Lily lets out a deep sigh. "The kids will surely miss both of you when your vacation is over," she said

"I am going to miss them too," Alice said with a sad-tinted smile.

"Well, you're always welcome here," said Gabby and wrapped his arm around her neck.

'Dang! His sweat smells like cologne!' she said to herself.

"Yeah, you're part of the family now," the headmistress agreed and slowly removed Gabby's hand from Alice.

Alice felt her blood rush on her cheeks because of her mother's actions. She knew that she just acted on the impulse of being her mom but Gabby did not know about that.

"Miss Lily, there is someone who is looking for Alice," said the nun from behind the headmistress

Miss Lily tilts her head over her shoulder and looks at the nun, "Who?" and looks back to Alice who is as oblivious as she is.

"Me?" Alice asks while pointing both her hands at herself.

And as if it was choreographed; Alice, Gabby, Miss Lily and the nun; sister Rachel; throw their gaze to the doorway of the cafeteria where two individuals are standing.

"Baby Bloom! Long time no see!" cheerfully said the tall guy in his late 20's while waiving about his huge hand.

Alice's eyelids blinked in disbelief, "Cooper!?" she mumbled in surprise and looked at the guy with him who was undoubtedly staring at her.

Cooper's little brother, "Bryan."