75 I'm not Qian Xu

Luo Xun put the flower amber in her palm and watched quietly.   

Why didn't Yin Nanzhao throw it away?   

At the time, she just used this method to express that the promise as beautiful as flower in the amber would never withered away through time.

Yin Nanzhao didn't even want her feelings, why still kept her promise?   

She remembered all of a sudden what Qian Xu had said in the cave of rock forest: 'I love you! Love more than you can perceive, otherwise I wouldn't be here.'

She later realized that this sentence was actually mixed with Yin Nanzhao's tone. If it was just Qian Xu, it would be natural to accompany her to rock forest as it ought to be, and no 'otherwise'.

Yin Nanzhao was not Qian Xu, but Qian Xu had indeed existed in his body.   

Luo Xun's nose burned. Although she still felt hard to calm down and her anger was still hard to dissipate, she didn't want to be blindly use anger and negative sadness to solve the problem anymore.

A mythical tree could bloom two kinds of flowers, the solitary and elegant blue small flower, and the cool and magnificent red large flower. Since looking at the flower couldn't tell the truth from the fake, then must look for the deepest root and dug out the root hidden deep in the soil.

Luo Xun walked to the treatment pod and stared at Yin Nanzhao's face.   

Because of a lot of blood loss, his face was sickly pale. With his eyes closed, he no longer looked so cold and cruel, and faintly had a little bit of Qian Xu. However, his thin lips were still shut tightly, showing persistent and valiant. Luo Xun couldn't help reaching out her hand, wanted to knead the corner of his mouth to make it as warm and soft as she remembered.   

Yin Nanzhao suddenly opened his eyes, his dark pupils like cold stars staring at Luo Xun coldly.

Luo Xun's finger kneading the corners of his mouth got stuck all of a sudden.

"I'm not Qian Xu." His lips moved and his breaths brushed pass Luo Xun's fingertips.   

Luo Xun blushed but did not take her hand back. She stroke down his chin and stopped at the collarbone, "In my memory, here and here... are all him."   

Yin Nanzhao's eyes darkened, "Luo Xun, I am Yin Nanzhao, not Qian Xu. If you want to find him in me, you will inevitably disappoint."   

Luo Xun opened her palm, quietly bloomed the passing long time tawny amber that wrapped blue mythical flower in her palm, "If you are not Qian Xu, why is Qian Xu's thing with you?"   

Yin Nanzhao stared at the flower amber, his eyes were dark and unfathomable, "Those past, I was wrong to you, but I am not Qian Xu."   

Luo Xun suppressed her sorrow and said calmly: "Yin Nanzhao, I know you are not Qian Xu, but only you can resolve the confusion in my heart."   

Yin Nanzhao raised his eyes and looked at her, "What do you want to know?"   

Four eyes met as if meeting for the first time on the street, while the past was like the last night's fireworks.   

Luo Xun's heart rolled over and over, yet looking back, she was already in a daze.   

What did she want to know? What could she do even if she knew it?   

...   

The first time she met Qian Xu was an accident.

Long before she came to Odin, Yin Nanzhao had already disguised his appearance and was treated at Alicata Life Research Institute.

Yin Nanzhao hid his identity from everyone, not specifically hid from her.   

It's just that, afterwards, he did push the boat with the current and took advantage of Qian Xu's identity to let her put her guard down.  

That time, her behavior was different from what they expected. Everyone doubted that she would cooperate with Al Empire from within and did things that would harm Odin Federation.   

Yin Nanzhao must also want to figure out if she harbored an ulterior motive.

When she took him as her warm light source and approached recklessly, he took the opportunity to observe her conduct and deeds.

When Zi Yan and Feng Lin gradually let go of their doubts, he saw through her that she was only consider Alicata as a transit hub for her life, and did not regard as home, not planning to live long.

She even stupidly sent a message telling him in person that she applied to participate in genetic research not because she liked it, but because for her to have a specialized skill so that she would not be starve after leaving Odin in the future.  

Yin Nanzhao obviously knew that she had different minds, but his thoughts was weird and behaved beyond expectation.

If it was Zong Li, he would definitely kill her with all his strength. If it was Zi Yan, he would secretly stop her. If it was Chen Sha, he would definitely be cold and detached towards her. Even the gentlest Feng Lin, if she knew that she had no intention to stay in Odin Federation at all, she would certainly not treat her kindly.  

However, Yin Nanzhao actually didn't mind at all, but instead generously cooperated and fully supported.   

She applied to join the Life Research Institute, he cast a crucial vote and helped her achieved her wish.   

She was afraid that she would not be able to keep her job, he reminded her that she could go to medical school to study, and let Chu Mo gave the green light to let her pass.

She wanted to improve her strength, he became her teacher and trained her strictly.   

She wanted to know Alicata, he took her to travel everywhere, and let her familiar with local conditions and customs of Alicata.   

...   

All of this was not because Yin Nanzhao believed in her, but because he believed in himself.   

He was like a powerful and confident hunter. Knowing perfectly well that she was a wolf pup, he still raised her with care, wanted to tame her.   

He let her thrive, becoming stronger day by day.   

If she could grow well, it would naturally be good for him to use. Even she couldn't grow well, he still not afraid. At worst just wait for the moment she showed her fangs and killed her in a single shot.   

Fortunately, she never had any other intention, only concentrated on running forward wholeheartedly.   

Time of ten years, dripping water wore through stone, but Yin Nanzhao's heart was as cold as iron and still never believed her.   

At the Consul's welcome back party, the Butterfly unit assassinated him.   

In order to capture the assassin, other people neglected her who had always at her place, but Yin Nanzhao did not.   

He must have seen her being kidnapped but didn't stop them and followed their game, letting the robbers took her away.   

He followed behind, hiding in the dark, watched her beaten up, watched her struggled for her life, until the last moment when she was about to take the robber down with her, Qian Xu then appeared to save her.

Probably until that moment that Yin Nanzhao really believed her and determined that she would not harm Odin Federation.   

Thousands of days, drop by drop, converged into dazzling stars, lighting up her dull life. She was really tamed by Qian Xu and truly fell in love with Alicata.   

When she told Qian Xu that she decided to stay and settled down, Yin Nanzhao felt that Qian Xu's task had been accomplished and planned to retire after winning a success.

Just in time his own illness attacked and her identity was exposed by Zong Li, Yin Nanzhao seized the opportunity to suggest for a breakup, wanted to end this role-playing.   

However, even with hundreds counts and thousand calculations, Yin Nanzhao didn't expect that the plaything in his eyes, the little wolf pup he wanted to tame for Odin Federation would actually fell in love with the role he played.   

Yin Nanzhao should think it was so ridiculous, right?   

He refused repeatedly, but not only did she not flinch, she kept entangled endlessly.

She stupidly confessed to him that she was a fake princess and begged him to flee with her, forcing him no choice but to kill Qian Xu and cut off her idea.

...   

The past was clear as if it was yesterday, one by one sweeping past her heart. Those countless questions once had, she didn't want to ask anymore.

Even if Yin Nanzhao admitted himself then so what?   

Could the word 'I'm sorry' erase the joyous heartbeat in the dawn of love, or could it erase the heartbroken pain when the lover was lost?   

Luo Xun said softly, "There is only one question. Since it had been decided that Qian Xu would be killed in the rock forest, why did you have to let Qian Xu told me that he like me?"   

Yin Nanzhao was silent.   

When Luo Xun thought he would never answer, yet she heard him said indifferently: "Has no one ever told you that originally I am the devil?"   

Luo Xun's heart was as if pricked by needles. She smiley sighed, "To be confidently evil as this much, you are indeed not Qian Xu."   

Yin Nanzhao did not say a word.

Luo Xun said: "When I first learned the truth, I was very angry and sad that I wanted to restore my memory and left Alicata with Ye Jie forever. Now thinking about it, I feel like I was changed as if committed suicide, so weak as if was not myself. Perhaps... I really love Qian Xu."   

Yin Nanzhao said coldly again: "I am not Qian Xu."   

Luo Xun sneered, "This sentence you have emphasized countless times. What are you actually afraid of?"   

Yin Nanzhao lowered his eyes and said plainly, "I'm afraid that you will forget what I did when you see my face. I am the devil's heart Yin Nanzhao, not the clean and beautiful warm sunny Qian Xu."

Smile on Luo Xun's face faded.   

She bent down, lying on the treatment pod's side, staring at Yin Nanzhao's face, "Rest assure, I know you are not Qian Xu, will not take you as his substitute. The one I love is Qian Xu, not you."

Yin Nanzhao slowly raised his eyes and looked at her quietly.   

Two faces faced face to face, so close just inches away, each could see themselves in the other's dark pupils.   

Once, this was the most familiar face whom her ear rubbed his shoulders and their hand gloved with each other, intimated and nothing could come between.

Now, these were the strangest eyes, indifferent and distanced, so close yet worlds apart as far as the horizon.

Yin Nanzhao suddenly smiled, "That's good!"