Chapter 144: Hidden Intentions (Sumgyeojin Uido)

Her words hurt me a lot more than I was prepared for, and it made me think about everything that she had written in her diaries. I had hurt her more than I should, but she was the one who stupidly liked to act like she was all tough and alright. And it turned out that I owed her, a lot more than I had realised. But I also remember my days without her and I was never going to go back to that, no matter how angry she was at me. I had big plans at risk without and I…I missed her too much to let her walk away from me, and what we had before I messed it up. Yeon's talents were beginning to shine and it would benefit me far more than Hui-Jae's contacts ever could. My father had trained me to become a man who analysed every thought and emotion that I had, but it was getting tangled up with Yeon's own plans and goals. She was the only person in my life that I had ever been intimate with and seen a future with, and I wasn't going to let that go over a few tantrums. I am sure that she has see a worse side of me over the years growing up and she never held it against me at all, so why should I? It was a habit of mine to see her everyday and I wasn't going to let her fade out again. I could only keep her close in my own way, even if it meant grabbing her as soon as her foo was outside of the door and drag her back to my mother's quarters which I had made especially for her s she can remain there and carry out the role that she refused to help me with in her stubbornness.

But we were not alone now as I had an unexpected guest living with me and kept Yen company- or got her into trouble. There was only one way to find out, but I would still keep my eyes on her.

What seemed like days later, I woke up from my bed to the sound of zither music playing from the direction of my mother's quarters. It was light and pleasant, and i hadn't heard of it in a while now, not since right after I had come back from the Loading War. I didn't even wait to bathe and change my clothes from the massive hangover that I was having, I didn't hesitate at all to follow the sound of the music that could put me at ease fora while before I returned to work. "What is the matter Yeon?" "I guess that I always find myself half-hoping that he shows up to let me out of here, it has been two days now and I need to get to school and…" "…are those really the only reasons why you want him to show up?" "What do you want me to say, Ae-Cha? He has a woman he is committed to and he just confuses me every time I see him. I have my own life to lead that I have planned for over a decade after I…" "Put on an act of being a naive and gullible child for a decade?" "I didn't have a choice back then with my epilepsy and I had no sense of foresight to see if I would ever be rid of it in the first place. I certainly never thought that we would be enabled in such a way…" "is that what you are thinking about? If he never took you in, then he would never have looked at you and him and his woman…" "Could live in peace without me. No matter how much I despise that woman, I am not someone who approves of fighting or competing with my own sex, it is truly pathetic. Actually, it is more pathetic that a man can set up multiple women to fight, as if we are toys to play with. By the way, did you send off that letter that I asked you to? For my brother?" "I did it as soon as you wrote it, he should be on his way here now to find you. But why haven't you told him about you being homeless?" "Am I homeless now? I have no idea what that man has in store for me, but clearly he isn't going to let me go. So it looks like I do have a home to go to, even if my brother won't be happy about it." "So what are your plans now? With him?" "What do you mean?" "Are you going to run away? Are you going to stay with him? Are you going to become his woman? Are you going to marry him? He already takes care of you so much, so why are you…" "I imagine that Hui-Jae must be very pleased with his progress already. 'Rain pouring over Lake Dongting, mist clouding over Temple Huangling. For my love, I am waiting here, and the haze over the ruffled water to clear…"

"Yeon! You cannot sing that song over the zither, it is bad luck! No-one has played The Lament of the Xiang River Concubine in over a century now!" "No-one is as lamentable as me right now; I do not see any other woman being used and manipulated by their first love whilst he has another woman waiting for him to return in full glory. There are many talented woman in our kingdom, so why must he do this to me? Why is he forgetting our decade-long friendship before he…" "I see the gloomy clouds in the music, in her keen eyes on the ruffled water.' Does this mean that you are sad without me, Seo Yeon?" I already knew that she wouldn't answer me in front of Ae-Cha, so I waited for her to leave before I entered her quarters. She had just come out of her bath that was still seaming hot and still had the rose petals in it that I made the maid pick for her since she seemed to have so much free time on her hands. She was still soaking wet through new clothes that was really beginning to distract me, to the point where I just launched myself in the bathtub without a moment's thought. "Your music disquiets my heart, it is pretty good; 'pale and haggard grows the yearner for his lover.' I know what that means now…" "So when is your lover coming for you?" "My lover is right here in front of me, why don't you look in the mirror and ask yourself?" "That isn't funny, when is she really coming?" "Yeon, look at me. If I told you that I have never even touched her, would you believe me?" "No I would not." "That is your loss then. I can d nothing if you want to live in your own delusions, but you will live under my roof Seo Yeon. As an unmarried woman, you will have no independence until you…" "until I what?" "What do you think? You will become my bride, and not only that. I will have you begging on your knees to marry me after this."

I admit that I didn't really know how I expected her to react, but the silence was a little painful the longer that it went on for. I am sure that she was shocked and probably finding every way possible to get out of this. "I am abashed by your flattery, but that will not happen and you know it. My brother will meet with me today and…and I have also written a letter to your woman on your behalf to come and collect you…" "I am sure that wasn't hard to do, since you have perfected my style of calligraphy." I was trying to remain as calm as I could, but I was really seething inside. By now, Yen should have seen my good intentions towards her as usual and be grateful for it. But she was really fighting me with every single move that I made for her sake and I was starting to loose sight of why I was degrading myself to following her around everywhere when she was the one who was in love with me?

"Where do you think you are going?" "I have school and work to attend to, in case you have forgotten. And my brother will meet me after school, so I shall be home late." "Come straight home after you have spoken to your brother. In fact; bring him here since he will need a place to stay overnight. We both need to talk abut your future anyways." "That's it? You are letting me go? Just like that?" "I know that you will never disobey me, since you have nowhere else to go. And by the way…" "Yes?" "Maybe it is better that you come home late after all, I do not want your paths crossing with Hui-Jae when she makes her way over here, it will spoil my plans completely."

As hard as this was for me, I didn't even need to turn around to see how badly Yeon was huffing and puffing behind my back. Hwi was right; Yeon had always grown up in such carefree environments that I knew that everything I was doing now was at the very least going to pique her interest in my plans as long as I gave her enough freedom to do what she wanted. She was so much like Hui-Jaw in most ways apart from one; Yeon was still a traditional girl who believed in serving men as the best hostess that she could be and starting a family. Yeon wasn't arrogant enough to always overtake the man when he was at work and she was even submissive in bed. Hui-Jae was absolutely none of those things and that was why she would never successfully latch herself onto a man to even pretend that it was for the right reasons. Growing up in a brothel made her hate men, apart from Seo Hwi apparently, and since she lost all hope of his return, she was now desperately trying to become equal to men in the most unflattering way. Little did she know that I had my own spies on her and I knew all about her plans. In fact; I really didn't need to watch her since she was making herself so damned obvious. But it didn't hurt to gather evidence against her, especially when it could come to use when Seo Hwi came to visit his future brother-in-law. Seo Yeon on the other hand, I could't tell what she was thinking, which was something I had never come across before. I read people's body and facial language like it was my job before I even approached them. But Yeon was different; it was like she had been purposefully trained to become so…enigmatic, which just made her all the more alluring to me from every single angle, which in turn, confused my motivations even more. But I had hoped to uncover any other of her…unique abilities that she was hiding from me so I could finally make up my mind on my final plan and prepare myself to drop at least one woman in my life so the mind-games stopped and we all could move on from the past…

"Young Master?" "I know what you are thinking, but Yeon is different, Sung-Rok. No matter how beautiful or talented other women are, they are all still too contrived, and that also goes for Hui-Jae herself. Seducing men isn't hard, but maintaining favour over a long period of time is something else entirely and is a rare talent to find in even the concubines of the past." "So what?" "Passionate ambition; money & power are the usual motivations, but it is easy to give up when you encounter set-backs. Yeon has her brother, but he is still not successful enough to help her move through every obstacle she can encounter for whatever her own plans are. Even if she runs into a huge rock, she will go on though to the end no matter what. Yeon…had the one quality that I lacked for my father. But she will pass it onto our future children, which is exactly what I need…" "How long are these plans going to go on for exactly?" "Until the day I die, exactly how my father taught me. And as for you, you will personally chaperone her from now on; every single word, action, tone of voice and movement shall be reported back to me. Remember; she will not only serve me well, she will also raise your own career in the palace if you stick with me long enough."

"So that is all this is between you both? Just your plans and not…" "Not what?" "You know…feelings of love and all of that other soppy nonsense?" "What does love have to do with it? I am not a person who recognises such a desperate emotion, especially after my mother…" "so you are not in love with anyone? Young Master?" :"I do not deserve it, especially after everything that I have put her through. But as long as I am forced to survive in this cruel world that doesn't acknowledge me, then Seo Yeon is my only lifetime that I must treasure, even if it means that I have to suffer a loss."