Reviews of The Idle System
The Idle System
Pegaz
- Overall Rate
- Writing Quality
- Updating Stability
- Story Development
- Character Design
- world background
It's complicated yet good novel. So, Author plays Idling to Rule Gods eh? The Idle System is likely 80% same as the game system in it. Cheers!
I'm waiting for you on the app's discussion channel!
Download the app to discuss your favorite works, TV shows, and even the weather with me!
Good job keep it upππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππ
This story has a lot of potential, but unfortunately the subpar writing is really letting it down. Before accusing me of hating this story, allow me to explain. Firstly, the author capitalizes too much. Any word that is not a name nor the first word of a sentence does not have to be capitalized, unless it's a proper noun. β e.g. a Christian church, Canadian whisky, a Shakespearean sonnet. Secondly, there are way too many plot holes in the story with several flaws in logic. I would also recommend that if you were to create a system based on numbers, the least you could do is to make sure your calculations are correct, as there are quite a few obvious mistakes I won't point out. Several terms were also used incorrectly. For example, instead of "artery system", you should have used "circulatory system". I understand that you may not be aware that you have been using incorrect terms but it's essential for good storytelling. I will not elaborate further on this issue, as its something that you have to figure out on your own. I would suggest reading English published books that have been professionally edited; it will be helpful in improving your grammar and vocabulary. I have also noticed that you made several mistakes with the usage of past tense, present tense, singluar and plural verbs. I might be coming off as nitpicky but as the saying goes, "God is in the detail". Bad grammar can cause descriptions to appear strange to readers and interrupt the story flow, as they will have to go back several paragraphs to make sense of what is happening. I hope the author will notice this review and improve on his writing, as the theme of this story has too much potential to be wasted. I wrote this review with the hope that 'original stories' in our community will gain more exposure and the *******ish writing will be in the future, not so *******ish.
To show my support and my love for this story, i'm making a review again.. I love the development of the story. And how direct the writing style, getting into the main point instead of puttimg too much nonsense just to make up for the word count. I'm not really the type of person who likes to comment and rate stuff, but for this original story i'm giving my full support (energy stones). I hope to read more of this story and please continue the good work. Just want to let you know (author) that i'm now a fan of this novel. Keep it up.
The novel tells us the story of a young man who gets reincarnated in a world where people like him (siders) are both feared and respected. Follow John, the strongest sider known to men in his journey to immortality with his idle system. Iβm really enjoying this, the only negative point is that I catched up in the chapters ;-) Keep it up author !!!
