3 loneliness

The past 4 years was all a lie. Since the very beginning it was all lies going into my ears. From Rhiley, the devil, to Tiffany, the slut. There's never been a moment where his eyes were on me. I'm not sure what I was being used for since I've had to beg for sex plenty of times. He didn't even like talking to me. What was I used for? I don't know. Maybe just to steal my stuff. Why was I the target though, I don't have very much stuff. Not sure what to do anymore, just live through life with no one and live with the numbness until I am hopefully killed. I'm not able to yet so in the mean time all I can do is pray to God that he likes me enough to end my suffering. My heart just feels so broken and lonely. No one to come and comfort me and let me know everything is going to be okay and actually give me a purpose to keep living. Nothing. No more hugs. No love. No more anything. I'm so sad