14 - Roadtrip

*Adrena's point of view*

I suddenly felt like I lost all the air I had left in my lungs. I so naively trusted Lorenzo enough to step inside the same car as him and let him ''rescue me''. As the words came out of his mouth, saying I won't be going home, I immediately knew, that my nightmare wasn't over. Perhaps, it hadn't even started yet.

''What do you mean 'I'm not going home?' You're kidding, right?'' I asked, while looking at him intensely, so I wouldn't miss a single detail. He looked straight forward, while blood was pebbling out of his fresh wound. I could tell that he was in pain. Only two minutes ago, I panicked because I was afraid he'd die, but now my own safety suddenly felt more at risk.

''Don't you think the men who just shot me, would go to your apartment first?'' he grunted, as his grip tightened around the wheel.

''Why would they go to my apartment? Clearly, I'm not the one they're after.'' I replied, still with my eyes glued to his face. I had to lean forward, so my back wouldn't touch the seat. It wasn't until now, that I realized just how much pain I was in.

He sighed as he turned his head to me for a brief second.''Could you cut me some fucking slack? Please don't tell me you're that dumb. They want to see us both dead, or – they want to see my head on a stick, and your body on a pole. You decide which one is worse.''

I felt sick again. This whole day has been crazy, it feels like a whole life worth of shit just got dumped upon me in one single day. Why were they after me? What did they want from me? I'm a nobody, I have nothing valuable to give them.

''Why am I involved in this? And more importantly – why are you involved? I thought you and Dimitri were working together?'' I said, as I grimaced from the pain.

He laughed, but didn't seem amused. ''Me and Dimitri? Okay, you really are that dumb. No, we don't work together, quite the fucking contrary. Look, I can't tell you much, but I'll tell you this: Dimitri is a dangerous and evil man, and I just saved your life! Now please, just let me think for a second, since I'm clearly the only one who's capable of that.''

I was seconds away from crying. The pain from my back was insane, and I felt like i was currently stuck in a limbo between life and death. I had nothing to say to him.

Twenty minutes went by, in complete silence. We'd driven out of New Jersey, but was going the opposite direction than Brooklyn. Where was he taking me? Just as I was about to ask, he pulled in at a gas station. ''Stay here while I get a first aid kit. Please don't run off, I'm too tired to chase you.''

Something told me to obey him. In any other situation, given the circumstances I was in, I wouldn't have, but where would I go? If he was telling the truth, then I would much rather stay in this car, than to go back to Dimitri. So I did as he said. He walked out, and halted as he entered the little shop next to the gas station. A few minutes later he returned, with a first aid kit under his arm.

He struggled as he tried to tie the bandage around his arm, clearly he was in too much pain to handle it himself.

''Even though I enjoy seeing you like this, I don't have the patience to wait for you to do that yourself.'' I leaned towards him. He looked at me strange, but let go of the bandage, as a signal for me to take over.

''Careful!'' he hissed, as I was tightening it. He cut his teeth while digging his fingers into his thighs. I was almost done, when he grabbed my arm: ''I said – careful!'' His eyes drilled into mine, but I wasn't afraid. I remember what eyes full of evil looks like, I've met them only an hour ago, and Lorenzo didn't have those. His eyes told me, that he'd seen evil and real pain, but not from looking in a mirror.

''I'm sorry, but we have to stop the bleeding! Unless you want to lose an arm?'' I snapped, as I finished binding it.

''Are you a doctor since you know so much about it, huh?''

Truth was, that this wasn't my first time fixing a wound. When I was about ten years old, my mother cut herself with a piece of glass - not intentional. But because she tried to find shelter for the night. So she broke into an old store that she thought was abandoned, and it wasn't, so we had to hurry out. In her hurry, she accidentally fell through a window that broke in her fall. This was just one out of many times where I've had to fix an open wound. Most of the times, it was because she was so high, that she couldn't take care of herself properly. So I had to rescue her, so she wouldn't bleed to death and leave me as an orphan.

''No, of course I'm not a doctor. It's not that hard to wrap a bandage around an arm. I'm done, your all set.'' I answered, as I leaned back to my seat. I waited for him to start the car, but for some reason he didn't. He just sat there, looking straight at me.

''What?'' I asked, as I stared back. He didn't remove his gaze, instead he, with a curious look on his face, said: ''Are you scared of me?''

''No. But I don't trust you.'' I replied, with my head facing the window.

He didn't say anything, but I could hear him adjusting his seat nervously.

''But I trust that you have somewhere safe I can sleep tonight, right? Since I can't go home?''

He fidgeted with his fingers, and as I looked at him, waiting for an answer, I noticed how his facial expression changed.

''It's not safe to find a place to stay yet, we have to get out of New York first, and we can't go back to my apartment. So my plan was..-'' he paused for a second ''to find a forest or an isolated place.''

Not only have I been held captured by a Russian psychopath, who used a whip to torture me, drugged me and tried to r*pe me, now I also have to sleep in some strangers car?

Before I was able to respond, he started the car. As he drove the car out on the main road, i said; ''I'm not comfortable sleeping in the same car as you.''

''Well, you don't really have a choice, Adrena. Unless you want to go back to Dimitri? I'm sure he'd welcome you back with open arms, especially after you spit in his face and kicked him right in his fucking stomach.''

He pissed me off. ''Well, I wouldn't have done that, if I wasn't because of YOU! It's your fault that my life is in danger, and it's your fault that I feel uncomfortable. Did you really think I would just go along with this? I think you're the one who's stupid.''

''I had no other choice, that's what you don't understand! I had to do it. You have no fucking clue just how bad this whole situation is. If I just minded my own business last night then..'' he paused.

''Then what? Please explain it to me Lorenzo, what would've happened then?''

''Just forget it. You wouldn't understand.''

''Even if I don't understand, you still owe me the truth. I've told you mine, don't you think it's time you tell me yours?''

''You are going to hate me so much, that you'd shoot me yourself, if you had the chance. If I tell you this, then it'll change your life forever. You can never go back to New York, and you will never be able to see your friend again. Are you willing to take that risk?''

What secret is so huge, that my life would be at risk? Aren't I already standing with one foot inside the grave?

''I don't think I have a choice. Start talking, Lorenzo.''

It was quite symbolic, actually. As the city vanished behind us, and was replaced with trees and small towns, he opened up. The sun was about to go down, so an orange light greeted us ahead, and reflected in his brown eyes.

''I've known bad people all my life. Their blood runs in mine, and I've seen good men being killed by the devil.''

I interrupted him: ''are you talking about d'yavol?''

''No. I'm talking about my own people and my own family. I'm not a good person, Adrena.''

''What do you mean?''

A few seconds went by, before he continued.

''I was born into the mafia. My father is the boss, and I was destined to take his place.''

Silence filled the car, which made my thoughts feel even louder. A nervous laugh escaped from my lips, while I gasped with my mouth wide open. I stammered; ''what?''

While looking straight forward, with his eyes on the road, he continued. ''We've been at war with the Russians for decades, but the past year has been quiet, and we've been real good at staying out of each other's lives. But last night, when I saw you, I ended that peace. I knew what would happen to you if Dimitri had it his way, and I couldn't stand the thought of it. So I interfered. My plan was to scare him off, maybe give him a blackie, as a reminder on how to treat women. But things got heated real quick, and I did some things I shouldn't have.''

I couldn't say anything. What a wicket dream this was.

''Adrena, please say something.''

''Are you going to kill me?'' I didn't even plan on asking, it just flew out of my mouth.

''Of course I'm not going to kill you, otherwise we wouldn't be sitting in this fucking car. Actually, I'm the one who's gonna keep you alive.''

If Naomi was here, she would have burst out in laughter. This is the most insane thing I've ever heard in my life, and I wasn't able to digest it. Of course he's not in the mafia, this isn't Godfather and he's not Marlon Brando.

''Adrena?''

It occurred to me, that I hadn't said anything for several minutes.

''Lorenzo, this is crazy. Look, I've met a lot of unstable souls in my life, and I promise I won't judge you, so please be honest. Are you bipolar? Schizophrenic? A sociopath?''

What he did next, added some extra proofs to my point. ''Look at my hand,'' he said.

''Why would I do that? Lorenzo, please just answer my question.''

With one hand still on the wheel, he stuck the other one right in my face and said: ''what does it say?''

I squinted my eyes, and played along – he was obviously having a nervous breakdown. ''It says… Fratellis? What does it mean?''

Wait, I've read that somewhere before. The gun! The gun I found in his apartment had the same thing written on it. But what does it mean?

I accidentally shouted ''I've seen that somewhere!''

''Yes. On the gun you hid from me, in my bedroom. A gun my father gave me, after I killed my first target. It's a tradition that you keep the first gun you used to wack someone. I was seventeen.''

I was speechless. Either he was really sick and disturbed, or he was telling the truth – both seemed insane, and actually not far apart.

''So you're a murderer? And then you want me to trust, that you won't kill me?'' My voice was shaking uncontrollably, and I felt like the four walls inside the car was gaining up on me.

''Why would i kill you? I just risked my own life, so I could safe yours. Would be a waste to kill you now.'' He replied, calmly.

I didn't say anything, there was a lot to process. A couple of minutes went by, before he turned right, and drove towards a forest that waited ahead. It felt like the opening scene in a horror movie – a young and helpless girl, stuck inside a car with a man, who had lives on his conscience.

I panicked. Why did it take me so long to realize, that I clearly shouldn't be in the same car as him? He's a stranger, and more importantly, a murderer. If what he's saying is the truth, then I would be much better off without him. I came to my senses. I had to get out. The car was still driving, but he slowed down the minute we entered the forest. Now's my chance.

I quietly unlocked the safety belt, and reached for the door handle. ''What are you doing?'' he shouted, as I opened the door and jumped out.

The amount of pain from the fall surprised me. I felt the dirt dig into my skin, and rocks cutting my face. The pain I already felt on my back, was doubled a thousand times. My body rolled a few turns, and each time my back hit the ground, I screamed in pain. From afar, I could see the taillights from the car. The lights came closer in an unnatural speed. With my hands, I grabbed the grass I was lying on and tried to stay on the ground, but something made me float. A sudden wave of tiredness hit me. And then everything went black.

…

''Adrena?''

…

Someone was shouting from a distance.

''Adrena, wake the fuck up!''

I slowly opened my eyes, and saw Lorenzo's face above me.

With all of my strength, I tried to scream: ''Get away from me! Don't touch me!''

I was silenced by his big hand, that he used to cover my mouth. He used his injured arm to grab unto mine, as he held me down.

''You have to calm down! I'm not trying to hurt you, I would never hurt you.'' He waited until my breathing slowed, before he removed his hand from my arm. ''And I would never touch you, not without your permission. Please believe me when I say, that I will do anything I can, to protect you.''

A tear rolled down my eye. I realized that Lorenzo had put me in the back of his car. I was lying down, with my feet touching the door. He was leaning towards me, with his knees grounded on the front seat. He looked concerned.

''Please say something.''

…

''Please, Adrena. Say something.''

I tried to get up, but my whole body was burning. My back was in an indescribable pain. From the side of my head, I could feel blood running down to my ear. The only thing that came out of my mouth, was small cries.

''Don't try to get up, you have to lay still. I…'' he paused. ''I tried to clean the wounds on your back, with the first aid kit. I also managed to wrap some bandage around it, but there wasn't enough the cover it all. What happened?'' His eyes were full of worry. I felt so small, so helpless. If he wanted, he could easily kill me this instant, I had no strength left.

His voice changed: ''Adrena, tell me what happened.''

The trauma I'd gone through the last couple of hours, was hard to imagine. Even harder was it, to tell him about it.

''I…. I can't,'' was the only thing, I was able to say. I could feel my heart beating inside my chest.

''It's okay,-'' he said, as he gently used his thumb to dry off my tear. I jumped as his skin touched mine. He quickly removed his hand, as a response to my reaction. Maybe I was crazy. But I suddenly needed his touch, more than anything right now. I managed to lift my hand, and reach for his. He looked surprised by my approach, but followed my order. He ran his fingers through my hair. I wasn't sure I could trust him with my life, or with anything. But I needed the warmth from his hands, which appalled more to me, than my life in this moment.

With a small and whispering voice, i stammered;

''Lorenzo?''

His voice was deep and sounded tired.

''Yes, Adrena?''

''What's Fratellis?''

I had to know, before i fell asleep. My curiosity was cutting through the pain and trauma.

With his hands still in my hair, he replied;

''It means brothers in italian. It's the name of the mafia.''