A Start (Green)

DISCLAIMER, THE FOLLOWING STORY IS JUST THAT, A STORY.

"What do you think?"

"Do they always have to die?"

"Yep, exciting, right?"

…

I still clearly remember staring back at her in disbelief, unsure what my following words should have been. 'Of course.' I shook my head. 'I guess. Nope, she'll think I think she is weird if I say that.'

"How so?" The words slipped out of my mouth as some part of me gave them the green light before my brain could even process them.

"It's pretty obvious, kid, we're all going to die someday, and stories where deaths changed things more than life are more realistic," Tori said as she played with her hair.

'She gets pretty dark a lot.' I thought before my mind got caught up with what she said.

"You're a kid too."

"No, I'm not a kid; I just turned ten," she said before smiling again at my lost expression.

"I'll stop calling you kid when you reach the double digits."

"I guess it was a good story. Why didn't he prove to them he could use his powers? They would have believed him, and then he wouldn't die."

"No, they would have killed him either way. Did you not hear how angry they were?"

"I heard how you tried to show that they were mad," I said as my face morphed into the same angry or scary expressions she had shown earlier.

"Alright, that's enough, I get it," she said after a while of watching me.

Of course, I didn't listen as she hadn't spent enough time watching.

"Sto-"

She moved towards me, and this is where it first began.

Instinct, that's what I thought it was, but usually, you have control over what you do when instinct kicks in. Instead, it felt more like my subconscious mind was forcibly taking over my body and causing me to act, unlike my usual self.

I knew she wouldn't hurt me (but I couldn't be entirely sure.), but for a split moment, I thought she would.

Suddenly the door nearest to us swung open. "Tori, Alex. There you are. What are you two doing in here all by yourselves?" A tall woman who wore glasses asked as she entered the room. Katherine, I could feel the implications behind her words, but at the time, I had no access to the rest of the world aside from the small bubble people wanted me to see as a kid at the age of nine.

"We were just waiting for everyone else," Tori said with a deeper tone than usual, something she did when she was annoyed.

"Sure, class is in the other room now, though. We went through this yesterday, come on, get up, let's go. Everyone else is waiting on you two." Katherine replied, ignoring her tone completely.

'Tori is annoyed, and it seems like she knew we weren't supposed to be in there, yet she convinced me that we needed to.'

I wanted to follow that line of thought, but another replaced it before I could.

My mind was all jumbled at the time as I tried to understand why I felt such a strong sense of fear. The confusion in my face didn't even get the chance to fade as a new group of feelings replaced it.

Something didn't feel right; I could feel a sense of overwhelming dread as my mind raced. The atmosphere of the room filled with voices seemed all too familiar. A strong sense of fear and the sounds of several voices assaulting my mind nearly cracked my defenses.

"I found them. They were hiding away in the old classroom."

"-my new shoes?"

"Yeah, we made it very clear that we would be moving classes yesterday."

"I liked your old ones too."

"The little devils are going to be a handful when they grow up."

"Alex likes you."

.....

I froze; I was already standing still, but everything else seemed to freeze for a moment.

'It's wrong; it's all wrong.' I thought for some strange reason.

I hadn't had any plans for the future at that point, but I still could tell that somehow things weren't going how I wanted them to go.

Of course, I liked her, but it wasn't something I had openly stated or even shown. It was even less likely that my sister, who is only six, would be the one to decipher that and tell her.

I could already tell who was putting those words into her mouth, our mother.

My eyes burned as I forcefully pried my eyes off of my sister.

I cracked; I felt everything slipping from my control. Anger, resentment, and even emotions I did not know I held within surfaced.

But I did nothing; I felt so much rage that if I had the option to destroy the world, I would have, but instead of acting on it. Everything reversed.

The next thing I could remember was that I had stormed out and sat down in some shade, holding back the seemingly infinite amount of sadness inside my head.

Tears fell, and my face contorted in an ugly way as I cried.

I don't know how long I was there, I expected someone to come to find me, but no one ever came.

If only I had known at the time that everyone else was preoccupied or that two men were several hundred feet above me casually gossiping.

"I think we may have overstepped our boundaries in the last meeting."

"Why would you think that?"

"Well, What I said, and how they all reacted. I thought I was being sensible, but even though many of them have not known combat, they seemed ready to go to war with or without us." One man said to the other, who thought for a moment before speaking.

"War affects people, and with it happening with short breaks in time, We're all different from one day to another. Maybe it's because the most bloodthirsty or conniving are more likely to survive, win, and thrive after the war, which leads to most people now who seem filled with hatred and a thirst for violence. Natural selection at its finest, a few thousand more years with war and peace dancing for control, and the war-loving human race will be released among the stars."

"That's a scary thought, but why are we different? Why does it seem so much easier to step back and distinguish right from wrong?"

"That's our curse."

"Right. Speaking of curses. The blackout still hasn't been resolved?"

"Nope, even the largest of cities out here seem to fall behind the smaller ones we left behind when it comes to bringing the grid back up."

"And you haven't located the source yet."

"Whoever it was was likely in the center; I don't see how the entire city would be affected otherwise."

"We'll start there then."

——————

It had been a while since those events, and I sat staring at one of the few candles I had made by recycling the wax from my mother's old ones and a unique wooden wick I got from a choice tree's fallen branches.

I already knew that I had awakened an affinity. The power to the whole city was cut off, and I could feel it had something to do with me, or I could feel something. The invisible force made me think it was a wind affinity, but part of me didn't believe that. It was too weak, and not a gust of wind was created.

After a while of staring, I sighed in frustration and put my head in my hands, staring at the candle for a few seconds before blowing it out.

I took off my shirt and winced at seeing the recently created scar. My mother had gotten mad again, and after using a curtain rod that was lying around to block her attacks with the belt, she pried it from my reddened hands using it instead. Luckily the sharp edge on it pierced my skin, and the flowing blood seemed to make her reconsider.

"Whether she regretted it or feared that she would get caught if she continued." These were the only two thoughts I could come up with at the time.

"It's making me tense up even when people aren't being hostile."

"Who left the bread on the table!"

"Alex did!"

I shuddered at the sound of my sister's voice. So many emotions wanted her to close her mouth for good, but I held my tongue even though I wasn't at fault and silently waited for the bedroom door to open.

"Finally!" I exclaimed as the flame on the candle in front of me split apart for a moment.

Frustration quickly replaced the joy on my face, though.

"It's weak."

"With this much, I would only be laughed at."

"I've seen others who could do much more than this get made fun of."

I stared at the candle for too long before exiting the sea of thoughts in my mind. I was too easily swayed into a bad mood as a blank expression appeared on my face. My father had left again, probably for a long time this time.

To make it worse, Mother had just told me that we wouldn't be able to afford to travel back and forth to that school.

For the time being, I would have to go to the school here and could go back later to see my "old friends." The thought of leaving stung, and only a moment of my attention towards it threatened to bring tears. Maybe it was a good thing; after all, that my last encounter with Tori had left some frustrations.

A few weeks ago

The day after the blackout, I saw Tori and her friends Gwen and Gab as I left the school for a field trip, avoiding them as I quickly got on the bus as one of the teachers called me to get on.

They, however, sat directly behind me. I felt relieved, but the fear once again appeared. An internal monologue ensued, quickly becoming me yelling at myself as my body refused to act.

'Get up; Say something!'

"Good Morning Alex," Tori's voice called out from behind.

"Good morning." It was all I could squeeze out of myself as I looked at her smile which seemed to have changed in my mind.

'What happened?' her smile, which I had used to see as pure, felt different and sent a chill down my spine. 'was she enjoying my embarrassment? My sister is already acting as if she had forgotten what had happened. Maybe they're all just toying with me.' I felt overwhelming paranoia then, and to take my mind off of it, I pulled out one of the books I was reading.

'I only enjoy reading because of Tori.'

Eventually the constant chatter on the bus died down, but I could still hear Tori and her friends.

'Truth or dare.' I thought as I heard their voices drop to a whisper. The name of the common time wasting game were the last word I heard.

A few minutes of their whispering passed and I shivered as they abruptly cut off. The atmosphere around me had changed. The girls had stopped playing truth or dare.

I didn't know how at the time but I was able to feel what was going on around me. Looking back it was the always the same invisible affinity that I used to split the flame on the candle.

Sure enough, my gut feeling was right; a moment later I felt a soft tap on my shoulder.

I turned around and asked, "what is it?"

"I like you too."

I froze up. 'is she serious? Why would she like me? I'm from a poor family, well, not much more than hers, but a lot less stable. Maybe she does, and I'm being quick to judge, but I... I can't take that chance.' I thought, stopping myself from taking things at face value.

If only I knew at that time.

I suppose it wasn't my fault though, I matured fast in many aspects but very few of them socially. My self isolation saw to that.

"Okay." I turned around to hide again, trying not to show the conflicting emotions that stuck to my face.

'I heard them giggle after I said that, were they laughing at me? Was okay a stupid response?'

I had wished that I knew what the truth was; it ached my brain and heart for quite a while.

Eventually, I decided it was true that she did like me, but even then I felt wasn't good enough. She had been able to gain control of the light element like her mother. She was also incredibly smart. All while I struggled just to try and focus on any subject other than math.

Unfortunately, the bad news had already came, and just when I had made visible progress.

The compounding of events, drained me and left me to feel a void within my self which never left.