Questionable Mental Integrity

"And so? That's it? You're just going to hire me lickity fucking split, just because I hit the proverbial bill for what makes a good "hire"? I can't tell if you're just stupid, or immensely more intelligent than me, because either damn way you make my head feel like a jackhammer." my insults were pretty obvious since the way she just talked made me feel a pain I haven't felt in such a long time.

"Ha! Finally you see the greatness of thi- HEY! That's insulting!" she caught on, damn, and here she was already exceeding my expectations. "Oh forgive me for not making more obvious, in any case, what exactly will I do? I get the "Be a dungeon master" part, but what of the "world subjugation" which YOU yourself have so amazingly put it? Seems odd that you and your dear "emperor" run a "company" and yet show signs of there being little to no bloody professionalism in the lime of work." I may have struck a nerve there as she just plugged her fucking ears and acted like a child who was hearing things that they surely did not enjoy.

"La la la! The puny mortal is so loud an-" she kept doddering on as I could almost feel an aneurysm edging in my brain, almost. "Can we just, get this over with already? World domination, then perhaps a revisal of the contract you and your emperor have put me in? Is that meager and minuscule little amount of leeway allowed?" I gave my concern as the "goddess" looked at me and nodded while waving her hand.

"Hmmph, of course you will little servant of ours! You will be one of the first to ever be given the chance to take a world in the name of our emperor! And it will not be the only one." her words seemed to have made my brain go cold turkey as the words repeated inside.

"I'm sorry . . . fucking what?" I looked at her with my glasses off a smile on my mouth that really accentuated the feeling of "I am going to make beating you a bloody symphony". "You ant me, to go out into the infinite unknown, and take what could be hundreds of worlds? I can't tell if you're insane or if you're a slave driver, because at this point you're ticking all the boxes for both. That's literal- you know what? I'll stop complaining, because you don't give a shit either way. What world am I going to now?" I asked the sprite while she coughed in her hands while looking off to the side.

"W-well, this venerable hasn't exactly chosen a world that would be good for m- our emperor just yet. But I will find a suitable one for him! For it is within my name, Hu Miaoyi!" she acted like a bloody "magical girl" as I just realized something that was odd about her. "Miaoyi? Why is the first syllable of that word sounding like a ca-" I WAS about to ask a genuine question borne of actual curiosity, until I saw her face that was about to explode in rage, therefore I held my peace.

"But, if you truly wish to ask for the name of your senior, you may call me Cressentia!" she said as I actually felt genuine surprise. "Cressentia, hmm, well, not half-baked for a name. Other than the issue of you being possibly connected to the moon, or a moon since I'll be going to another world entirely." I laughed a little as the goddess pouted and called me mean again.

Rude little shit.

"Alright, so, you broke my glasses. I suppose I would like to go to the world already. If you have any "starter kits" for me, I should pretty much be asking for them right now, shouldn't I?" I asked a good question as the damned female sprite just laughed at me while rolling on the bloody floor.

" . . . . . You're shitting me, aren't you?" I was genuinely concerned for my wellbeing when I heard her explanation. "No help, only a very basic idea of how the "dungeon" actually works, and on top of that, it's an absolute clusterfuck of a world with BLOODY MAGIC OF ALL THINGS. Are you expecting me to jump off a cliff the very moment I go to the world? Is this some form of a test that you and your emperor wish to throw onto me?" I was trying my damnedest to bargain for a good chance of some form of crutch.

This was magic damn it! There are soft systems and hard systems! If you're going to give me a soft system and everyone else a hard system, there are many little adversities I'd have to deal with. Firstly, a soft system is difficult to work with. I don't know how the fuck does their magic work in their world, and if I don't know how even my own works, it would be easier to just jump into the world as a fucking torso. I'd have a higher chance living like that.

Secondly, if they have a hard system and they see me doing some odd things, my chances of living get infinitely more unstable due to the issue of them possibly labelling me as a great "Demon Lord" or something. If I were given the chance, then I sure as well would have chosen to be a middleman, someone involved with both sides. Expectations from neither, and yet all the possibility from both.

If I was going to cause chaos and ruin to a world, I would've preffeere to be my own little faction with my own plans. Not getting merry merry with the fucking groups. "Cressentia, I will be absolutely clear with you. If I don't at least have a minuscule little crutch, I'm not gonna live for long there." I gave her my concerns as she just waved them off.

"Well you will obviously have at the very least one or two little bits of help! This venerable will ensure your safety for a good while!" she said to me as I genuinely doubted that. "With all due respect, I severely doubt that. I'm a man that likes his technology, and likes his mixes of magic within it. If I'm going to try and take a world that's still in it's medieval ages, then I sure as hell wouldn't be wanting to play by their rules.

They're going to get a taste of something very close to my home and heart. That's the promise, that old man ????? is going to be giving them." I finished my words as the sprite goddess seemed to look uncomfortable when I said my name.

Wait, my name. Wait wait wait a damn fucking minute, WHAT IS MY NAME. "CRESSENTIA!" I ran up to the goddess as my eyes were essentially bloodshot. "MY NAME. WHAT'S MY NAME?!" I asked the goddess as she gave me the actual contract and I read the little clause for being their personal "worker".

"The contractee's name will be taken for safekeeping in the meanwhile to ensure the confidentiality of any and all operations." FUCK. "WHY. WOULD. YOU. HAVE. A. CLAUSE. LIKE. THIS?!" I could only really describe my current expression as fucking angry, and that doesn't completely show it off.

"It's exactly as the contract states little servant of ours! We don't want your true name to get out into their world, since it's a very well-known fact that once someone has your true name, you will be completely under the discoverer's power!" she gave me an answer as I could almost feel like strangling her.

"And let me guess? You're supposed to be better? You and your oh-so precious emperor are goin to make sure that little old me isn't going to get himself killed by your command? As you yourself stated, you have my name, my "true name" if that made any sense. I'm an old ass man from jail that's serving his time for the crime.

If that doesn't really show the obvious signs of suspicion, then add blind to the roster of bloody descriptives for me." I gave as much poison within my words as she seemingly deflated. "So what now? At this point, I'm hanging onto what little patience I have with a fucking thread, trying my best not to strangle you. You scare me, that's true enough, but human anger is more than capable of making me stupid enough to attempt doing so. Get me off of this place as soon as possible, or else both of us are going to regret certain decisions." I gave her an actual ultimatum for once.

I was in no way a smart man. Never was, even in my youth, and threatening what was essentially a goddess was a damn good way to prove that as a fact.