1 the beginning of the start

Dear Someone,

today is August 23rd the being 2042

I've only started writing to see how my life will change after starting what will be the start of forever hell for me

untill I finish college cause I guess it's different here

I hate that we must move so much I don't understand why I have to start another family and go to another school I don't understand.

why an I always being sent away dose no one love me for me or am I just to complicated I hate starting a new school it makes me feel like its going to happen again. this is now my forth family and its it's not better then my original family, but it's no worse it's maybe gotten better I don't know perhaps that's just me telling myself so I won't feel that bad but it's not as if I had friends In my last school.....or the one after that.....or any of the six till now. I hope this school is different. I hope this family isn't like my other family. I really hope this one loves me better. I super tired of having to change school for something I am for being something the world doesn't understand. being so different then all the other girl will be a pain to have to deal with all over again.

I've been in my new home for now almost I think since June because we had to unpack and make sure we were all settled for school to start soon.

the school is called "Summers Bay Academy"

its been almost three months and I haven't seen this "new father" of mines yet mother said he's on a business trip that he's "handsome" and that he's "happy" to have me and "see me". or what ever that means.

boys are gross anyways I've never seen one boy in my whole life that I have found not nasty I don't know if it's just me or I rather look like one then be with one.

that's a topic for another time right now the topic is school.

This feels so weird to write down everything but if my therapist says it's good and is a better way to understand myself then we'll I guess its good. but after every one of our monthly sessions I have to let her read or skim through it so he could better understanding me too.

Im just worried that loving the type I love is not allowed in this school at least we get to wear uniform so being picked on for my so called quote on quote odd and weird stype is off the table for a reason they can tease me for.

but it feel weird having to wear skirts tho even I don't feel the way they say I am. what ever I guess I'll get a long lose one.

there not ugly the uniforms no lie there kinda cute

I might app pockets to my skirt and like other think I do know yet the less skin I show the better.

the girls wear different colors based on grade and school year

I tried asking if I can wear pants or shorts uniform but then.....they looked at me really I mean reallyy funny not a good kind an ugly confused kind of.

the administration of new comers were like " well tough lady why would you want to do a thin like that" they even called me mad the told me no woman should look like a man if you were a man the Lord would have made you one.

old rinkled hag I didn't even get to say another word before being forced to say sorry.

why do I have to say sorry to that old ugly dried up raisin she should be saying it to me I hope the rest of my school year is better then my sign up.

I wonder what my teachers will look like and what subjects I'll have.

now that we moved from the city now into the soft peaceful suburbs I hope things will be calmer here. I hated the city all those people are so rude and pushy and some are mad scary. like that one man at the train station the trains are dirty and grows I hope the trains here are sorta cleener.

I'm just so glad it's an all girls school this time maybe things won't go as scary and red I can only hope in every star it doesn't. I will be back another time to talk about my school and I may even write about jus myself as for now