Another Side of a Epic Tale

Wall were always walls to me. Meaning always found a way to escape me, but now meaning was my only reason for breathing.

Ever since this big, bad accident I couldn't even remember who I was.

But that night at the gala I saw a glimpse. Her. As she says there, on that bench, crying her eyes out. I thought maybe the sounds of her tears where what lead me to her. But as she turned around I saw it, in her eyes I was someone to her. And in my own, she was someone to me. This feeling was inconsolable, everyday it consumed me, and I wish it didn't. That second we exchanged names she ran. But her name lingered on my lips, Francesca. Nothing special, but it had meaning.

"Nathaniel" I hear someone call my name as I take a deep breath and continue to try and stomp this feeling into a corner as I open the door, stepping out of the room and into the desolate hallway. "There you are" she says through a smile as I smile back.

I had no idea who this woman was, she had been helping take care of me for the past few days and I wished that I did, more than anything.

"I thought I could take you to the attic" she says cheerfully as I sigh.

"Okay" I mutter under my breath as she leads me.

Leading me up the ladder. Into a sad, helpless feeling place, I sat on a box as she continued opening boxes. Showering them for baby photos and old home videos she could use to jog my memory.

"Who are you again?" I ask her as she looks up from her scavenger hunt.

"I'm your aunt Abigail" she answers sadly as she let out a desperate sigh. "I was here when your mother….." she says as suddenly her voice ends so abruptly. "Passed" she adds as she continues.

"I'm going to get some water" I excuse myself as she looks up from her box.

"Do you need me to go with you?" She ask as I nod my head profusely.

"I'll be fine" I reassure her as she nods and continues.

I didn't want water. I just wanted a excuse to breathe, be by myself and within my own. To hear my thoughts. Wandering the halls of this home I didn't recognize.

Suddenly I find myself standing outside the only closed door in the empty home. The door was blue, the rest remained that solid white color, lacking personality. But this one was different, alluring.

Opening the door I saw a room, somebody's bedroom. A hairbrush sat above the bathroom sink, a freshly made bed and a dresser, still full of clothes. It felt so familiar.

Sitting on the bed, next to the nightstand.

"Nathaniel?" I hear someone call as I turn my head quickly as the lamp falls. Breaking into small pieces as I sigh. Bending down to pluck the shards from the carpet and suddenly I see it. A simple journal taped to the bottom of the nightstand.

"Nathaniel?" I hear again, but this time closer. As I pull the journal off of the bottom of the nightstand, stuffing into my jacket and zipping it up. "There you are!" Abigail exclaims as I smile at her.

"I just saw this room" I tell her as she sighs. Taking a deep breath and entering, slowly moving her gaze throughout the room.

"This was your mother's" she explains as I stop. "She loved this room, made it her own" she admits through a smile. "God! I miss that woman!" Abigail recalls as my smile dies. "Let's get out of here before the bad memories slip back in" she insists as she grabs my hand and rushes me out of the room.

"What happened to her?" I ask her as she closes the door behind me. Cupping the door with her hand, recalling the person who used to be behind them.

"She committed suicide" she admits as I freeze at her confession. "She hung herself in the dining room. You were just a child when she did it. But you were old enough to know she was gone" she explains as I take a deep breath. "Are you okay, Nathaniel?" She ask as I nod my head no.

"I need a break" I tell her as she nods and I walk to the only room I do know, my own. Locking the door behind me, I pull the journal from my jacket and holding it in my hands. It's leather exterior left me wondering what was behind the cover.

Flipping open the leather cover and into the pages filled with cursive scribbling. Some rushes, other in hatred and some with tears still absorbed into the pages.

But the last entry was what stumped me the most. The most tear stained page and quickly scribbled of all.

Dearest tomorrow,

I'll miss you for upcoming time, til infinity. Maybe you'll see me again, when the sun sets for life and the moon never rises. Maybe.

I lived, I loved the wrong man and watched him fall in love with someone I was not. Why did I fight for his love? Was it not enough for him the whole time? And why did it have to be her? My own sister, my blood? I aches much worse now, now than it did before.

It's worse to make this decision now, but I know Elijah will never let me go, to him I am just another pawn. Not someone he once loved, someone he settled for. To him I was nothing, but I know when I leave in a body bag I still will remain that, nothing.

I wish it didn't have to be like this. I wish I could see Nathaniel once more, watch him grow, but that would only make it more painful. I know Elijah will care for him, the only way he knows how, and I know Abigail will help. This is for the common good of us all. Of me, to finally feel something other than sadness and betrayal, to feel free again!

"AUNT!" I yell from my room as I march down the stairs and into the dinning room where she sat. Staring at the chandelier.

"Nathaniel" she says as she smiles.

"What happened!" I ask her as I slam the journal on the table. "What really are you to my father?" I ask her as she looks astonished at my question. "Cause even my mom knew you two were something more! So what were you?" I ask her as she takes a deep breath and starts.

"I'll tell you it all" she says, "but you just have to listen" she tells me as I just nod and sit down, waiting for her explanation.