Warm, Yet Itchy

A faint smile played on Taizong's lips, his dimples appearing and disappearing. "Dearest, which one is it? Did you get lost or did you stop by some place interesting?"

Now, his fingers clenched around her wrist could sense the feel of a pulse against the soft flesh of her skin.

A second's hesitation. Her heart thumped a little wild.

"The imperial grounds are so vast, you know I always get lost."

Taizong curled his fingers tighter around the slender wrist. This sense of anger was unfamiliar and heart tormenting—he had never felt it in his last thirty years of living. And to top it all off, this anger seeping through his customary mask of aloofness presently showed on his face. Also, a throbbing headache began to sneak on him.

Emika had rarely seen such an expression from him. He always was extremely poised and self-restrained with his emotions—be it love even— thus in that moment those unfamiliar eyes unsettled her.

This expression was quite alien to his nature and she didn't understand why he was looking at her this way. He never had once looked at her this way.

In truth, trying to understand his mind was like digging out a treasure chest that is buried deep down into the crust of the earth. It required such efforts that most times she didn't want to waste her energy to rack her brains.

And today was one of those times.

Nonetheless, she often wondered what she might find within that treasure chest. What secrets would he told her?

Yet, in the next moment she observed that Taizong acted unperturbed and he gazed at her attentively.

He gave her that soft smile again—always the exact copy of all the previous smiles and infused with just the right amount of warmth.

On every occasion she felt his smile lack something. Perhaps it lacked a sense of youthful exuberance and candour similar to that of his brother.

Emika thought it was very sad indeed that not only his conduct but even the smile of the Emperor was not free of any binding rules of etiquette and duty! If not, Taizong could surrender to the spontaneity of his heart and Emika believed that his smile would be truly ebullient.

"Dearest, our wedding date is approaching near." Taizong finally broke the silence. "We live in a world where marriage is a union of compatibility of skills and assets, it is fortunate that the two of us also have things like affection, respect and trust. It is easy to discover invaluable treasures but difficult to find a faithful love. Don't you think, Dearest?" He was pleased to hear his voice sounding gentle and romantic.

The way he stared at her… What is that I am expecting to say? Emika often worried she didn't smile enough and didn't display her affection as passionately as lovers do.

She didn't want to disappoint the man that gave her warmth, trust, and revenge for her family when all hopes were dashed to pieces. He had restored the illustrious name of her lineage in The Ancestral Hall and bestowed upon her father, mother and brother the reverence they deserved with the ceremonial rites to repose their wandering spirits.

Therefore, she answered with a nod. She answered with a smile.

Then Emika did both at once.

Taizong drew out from his sleeve a scarlet silken thread, and tying it around her wrist with multiple knots, he stated with a strange tone: "The nuptial tie IS to be linked."

As Taizong did so, his headache heightened. He wondered if the coil of his hair twisted into a very tight knot was causing it.

"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength." He drew the gold kingfisher hairpin from his guan and inserted it delicately into the half chignon on the top of her head. "It saddened me greatly that my duties does not permit me to care for you as often as I would wish to. Every time you are gloomy of heart I hope that this token of my affection gives you strength to endure the pain until my next visit."

Everything was said with too much affection, more than what she was comfortable with and accustomed to in this time of mourning. Her body unintentionally reacted to this new feeling, and this perceptible furrow of her eyebrows irritated Taizong. But why did her lack of enthusiasm and apparent apathy to his words suddenly provoked him so?

Also, he knew she had lied about her whereabouts and collected the jade hairpin as a keepsake. He wanted to confront her. But he decided not to probe, for he didn't have the energy to care—the ache still lingered. He rubbed his temples with both his hands and closed his eyes. Yes, the handmaiden must have had twisted his hair into an overly tight knot. He should dismiss her!

Taizong felt Emika's gaze of care and concern on him and returned her look, his eyes calm as still waters. Shortly after he held his hand as he spoke slowly:  "The torment you have been feeling has also been my punishment. Heavens know you have been wronged the most, and in time you will be avenged for all the calamities you have suffered. I vowed to avenge their murders, and I will not rest until my promise is fulfilled." She raised her sleeve to her cheeks to hide her sorrow, and her tears dewed the satin. "Dearest, you know I would help you more if I could."

Emika didn't say a thing because her heart was colourless. Her hand glided away from his. The movement was gentle but Taizong felt it carried a startling resoluteness. Eventually, she ambiguously replied: "As a little girl whenever I played with a doll, I pretended that it was you, and dressed it up nicely and made a great fuss over it. Now you make a great fuss over me sending me the finest gowns and jewels, and delicious foods; and granting me your precious time to comfort me."

He was massaging his temples and he observed how her eyes swelled once more with genuine worried as she looked at him. She offered a soft and comforting smile.

Her mouth did not stray on the side of smallness with lips plump and curved—had they been kissed by his brother or would he be the first one to claim them?

Taizong lightly kissed her forehead and not intending to go any further he let go of her. Agitated but free from hesitation or indecision, his mouth suddenly finding hers possessed it with a masterful assurance.

She blushed and gasped when his lips parted hers.

Emika didn't know how to match the newness of his ardour. She could only blink in confusion. Evidently it has to be so, said she to herself. After all, I am to become his wife and such intimacy is required.

She noticed that he slipped back into his shell of a detached demeanour and he gave her his accustomed smile.

Was her heart belonging to him? Did he care? Like a woolly garment she kept him warm but was itchy in comfort.

Yet, he just couldn't help to put up with it.