1 Chapter-1 My first summoning
~DING~
System generation complete.
Cheater sheet will now be displayed.
——————
Name: Kyle Woods
Species: Human [High-human/hallow-hybrid(Hidden)]
Blessing(s): Ḉ̸̝͈̺̖̏̾̀̓̈́̀̆̀͋̾̊̆͛̕͠ḩ̷̡̧̧̳̞̺̟̗̣̹͚̮͉̞̲͎̬͚̦́͛͌̀͂̏̓̋̆́͊̈́͑̽̽̓͜͝æ̷͉̬̺̑̒̌̏̿̀̓͌̌͆̃̃͠͝œ̸̨̫̣̙̠͉͂͛̇̒͜s̸̡̼͘(hidden)
Perk(s): Retention Lv-1 [-] Fate-less Lv-MAX (hidden)[-] Chaos bourn Lv-MAX (hidden) [-] Barren worlder Lv-MAX
Abilities: Appraising eye Lv-1 *NEW* [-] Aggregate growth Lv-MAX *NEW* (Level hidden)[-] Hand-to-hand combat Lv-81 [-] Rapid recovery Lv-73 [-] Cooking Lv-92 [-] Tracking Lv-78 [-] Espionage Lv-88 [-] Driving Lv-67 [-] Acting Lv-90 [-] Hacking Lv-58 [-] Sleight of hands Lv-74 [-] Edict memory Lv-MAX [-] Presence reduction(Minor) Lv-42 [-] Tranquility Lv-57 [-] Internalization Lv-51 [-] Commanding Lv-83 [-] Seduction Lv-76 [-] Gilded tongue Lv-87 [-] Sexual pleasuring Lv-47 [-] Weakness detection Lv-32 [-] Engineering Lv-41 [-] Sharp shooting Lv-67 [-] Shooting Lv-72 [-] Anatomy Lv-32 [-] Calculation Lv-56
——————
'Really? This shit is real? Fuck me man.'
"*Sigh*, so what do I need to do?"
Inform of me stood an older look man with white hair, crimson irises, good set of wrinkle, white long-sleeve button up with the sleeves rolled up to the elbow, black vest, pants, and dress shoes, including a golden monocle.
The perfect stereotypical butler wear in all its gloriousness. If only his name was Sebas, this would be absolutely perfect.
"Hello mortal, my name is Sebas, and I will be informing you of what your required to do for the divine mission."
'…fuck yes.'
"Mmmm, and if I don't want to do it?"
He looked me in the eyes with those cool irises and golden monocle.
"That is not an option. You WILL do this mission because you have been chosen."
"So basically slave labor, eh?"
His face turned colder than dry ice.
"Be grateful you lowly creature. A God has chosen you to carry out their will. You should be thankful you even get to step foot in their presence."
I looked at him blankly.
'Man, I take back every nice thing I said about you.'
"Alright man, so what do I need to do because I would really like to go back to my home planet, it's Earth if you didn't know."
He pulled a pen and paper out of thin air which was pretty cool. He started to scribble down my name, then he put my race as human which confirmed some of my suspicions about my character sheet too.
He didn't write down anything else, then raised his gaze back to me.
"Simply say character sheet in your mind or out loud. Then read to me everything on it. If you lie about anything I'll know immediately and will torture you until it's time for your mission. Time flows how I want it in here so a few years of skinning you would really be a nice vacation."
'Yeah you're an absolute prick. Can't believe it, looks like the best butler there is and is an asshole, truly unfortunate.'
I read of everything there…except my hidden things. I debated wether to reveal the ones that say level hidden but chose to do so in the end.
At the end of my spiel the assh- butler was looking beautifully stupefied. I don't know what and I could careless, I just want to keep starting at his stupid faces expression because it's funny.
"Yo-you said you came from Earth?"
"I feel like someone who is a God wouldn't have bad memory but I guess maybe your age is catching up to you. Anyway yes, Earth, the one with Donald trump, JFK, French Revolution, Kangas khan, Napoleon Buonaparte, the Mona Lisa…ringing any bells?"
He was now staring down at his desk with eyes so wide they might fall out. I was having a wonderful time at his expense.
"This is…impossible, completely impossible. It's a barren world, so skills are unable to be leveled up further than twenty five at most. What in the nine hells are you?"
I put a sunny smile on my face, cross my arms, and deal my final blow.
"A dude who really likes pizza with ranch, watching anime, movies, tv shows, and can kick some serious ass if needed."
His face crumpled like he had eaten shit.
"You are lucky that you seem to be special, now I can't break you before sending you on your way for that remark unfortunately. Die slowly and painfully mortal, it will satisfy me greatly."
A glow started surrounding me.
"Will do old man, make sure to say hi to your wife or daughter for me if you have one, tell them I'm not dysfunctional like you if they need company."
He instantly appeared in front of me with the face of a demon showing itself. I grinned fiercely and with a pop, I was in a different white space with three other people.
~DING~
[The title {Batshit crazy} has been acquired.]
[Batshit crazy: You in all of your insanity infuriated the manager and escaped miraculously completely unscathed. That was dumb and did nothing for you except give you this title which does nothing, because you're stupid. However because it was hysterical and stays true to your chaotic nature the title will unfortunately give you something. Once every 24 hours you will be teleported 1,000 kilometers in a random direction if you are hit with a killing blow. ]
'So I'm guessing the guys blessing- or gal- or neither what ever gave it to me has some influence over the system thingy the Gods use? Well whatever he seems like we'll get along just fine.'
I turn my focus back to the two women and other man in front of me.
Screens were floating in front of their faces. The guy had brown hair, brown eyes, lanky arms, spindly fingers, a shifty face, thin lips and shard nose.
——————
Name: Tom Wilcox
Class: Agricultural Hero
Species: Human
Blessing(s): Osiris *NEW*(Temporary)
Perk(s): Soft hands
Abilitie(s): Masturbation Lv-19 [-] Covert stare Lv-18 [-] Self fingering Lv-13 [-] Agricultural understanding Lv-23 [-] Holy light Lv-1 *NEW*
——————
'…what the fuck? You know what, never fuckin' mind, I don't even want to remotely know.'
I switch my gaze immediately to the shorter of the two ladies. She has long black hair, striking blue eyes, a button nose, softly arched eyebrows, slightly full lips, and a sharp facial structure.
She would have been a model easily.
——————
Name: Lisa Wilson
Class: Structural engineering Hero
Species: Human
Blessing(s): Osiris
Perk(s): Natural beauty
Ablitie(s): Gossip Lv-16 [-] Bullying Lv-19 [-] BDSM subjection Lv-17 [-] Cock and ball torture Lv-14 [-] Female seduction Lv-17 [-] Male seduction Lv-9 [-] Rape technique Lv-16 [-] Reverse rape technique Lv-13 [-] Clitoris and anal torture Lv-19 [-] Acting Lv-21 [-] structural engineering Lv-19 [-] Holy light Lv-1 *NEW*
——————
'Why the fuck are they all so…fucking twisted and sick. Ones a sick pervert with a peeping issue, ones a sick twisted bitch that is absolutely disgusting, what's the last one gonna be a pedophile and sex trafficker?'
I look towards the taller lady. She has beautiful blond hair, gray eyes like a raincloud, gentle but defined features, a mix between a button nose and a Greek nose, and luscious lips.
Although she was relatively tall it just added to how pretty she was. She was amazingly curvy in all the right places and that ass was looking perfectly scrumptious.
——————
Name: Natalie Hemlock
Class: Scientific Hero
Species: Human
Blessing(s): Osiris
Perk(s): Nymphomaniac [-] natural beauty [-] Kind hearted [-] Self restraint [-] Virgin
Abilitie(s): Self pleasure Lv-19 [-] Anatomy Lv-14 [-] Cool headed Lv-13 [-] Cooking Lv-23 [-] Painting Lv-16 [-] Selfless Lv-18 [-] Mechanical Engineer Lv-13 [-] Electrical engineer Lv-15 [-] Scientific understanding Lv-14 [-] Holy light Lv-1 *NEW*
——————
'Oh, thank the fucking Looooord! She's just a pent up virgin nympho that is smart and seems to have an amazing personality. I would have lost my shit if she was a sick freak too.'
I walk over to them and introduce myself.
"Yo, I'm Kyle, I used to be part of a black ops unit for the US. I like pizza, anime, cuddles," which drew a little giggle-snort from Natalie "and you should all say character sheet out loud or in your head. Oh- and you guys should probably introduce yourselves to because I have a feeling we are going to be stuck together for awhile."
I give my best professional smile I could muster. Sick fuck female's eyes glinted, Natalie gave a slight jerk with a hitch in her breath, and sick fuck male just stood there like a retard.
I could see Natalie's eyes staring into space, more accurately her character sheet soon followed by the sick fuck duo. They all quickly looked back at me then the screen then me again.
It was dog shit hilarious and I had a hard time keeping a straight face.
A figure soon appeared in the air which I posted at seeing they were definitely about to ask me questions.
"Ask then because I don't know."
A strong giggle came from Natalie this time. We all stood there waiting for the figure to stop glowing. It was kind of getting annoying in all honesty.
After another 30 seconds the 'God' showed himself. Green skin, black hair, a pharaoh beard that looked stupid as fuck, obsidian black eyes, and an overly muscular build for how short he was.
"Greetings my hero's! I have an important mission for you. One of the worlds I govern is under attack by a rampant demon king. His undead and vicious demonkin are trying to over throw the world. Kill the demon king and his kind before that can happen! Once you achieve victory I will return you to your world. You don't need to worry about learning the languages, I will give you [Language comprehension] which allows you to learn any language after hearing a few words of it. Good luck hero's, and remember, so long as you four are together you can win."
With a snap of his fingers and a glow that was really starting to get the fuck on my nerves we appeared inside a cathedral.
We were completely surrounded.
•
•
•
•
•
If you see any grammar errors lemme know :)
