Shame It Got Ruined
She sobbed quietly but heard a knock on the door frame. "Just come in," she answered with every bit of control she could muster, quickly wiping away her tears. Ethan came to the bed and looked at her, assessing the messy scene in front of him. He looked clearer than the evening before but was also clearly missing his shirt. She knew she had woken him up, and felt even worse about it. Avoiding his view she looked away, feeling guilty and ashamed of her helplessness.
Without losing a word he sat down next to her, taking the bloody gauze out of her hand. Ethan's hand reached toward her face and gently pulled her chin up. He waited patiently until she finally inclined her head a little more to look him in the eyes. His fingers felt warmer than the day before.
"Don't do this. This is not, and never has been your fault."
His words washed over her like a warm wave and the chaos of thoughts in her head calmed down. For a short moment, she had lost herself in his eyes and forgot to answer. He always radiated this calm self-confidence like nothing could ever shake him up. This was probably one of the reasons which made her trust him since the day they met.
He slowly let go of her chin and drove his palm along her jawline, wiping a last tear from her cheek with his thumb. "Now let me take care of you," he whispered.
Ethan cleaned the blood off her and put a wound-closing strip over the small tear. She knew she should feel the pain of the gentle movements around the injuries, but all she felt was his hands all over her side. Her eyes glanced over to his concentrated face and the muscles of his arms, moving under his skin. His fingertips lightly followed along the wounds until she knew his eyes found the small tattoo on her ribs.
It was a waning crescent moon, a dedication to her former love, to the man she thought she would spend the rest of her days with until she realized it had all been lies and manipulation to get what her Ex wanted. The reason she left the city and landed here, far away from his grasp. One of the wounds had cut through the tattoo and the scar that would develop would render it broken.
"Shame it got ruined," Ethan said quietly, looking at it like it stirred something in his head.
"Trust me, it's for the best," she answered, and the dry undertone made him look up from the tattoo, right into her face. She was not ready to talk about it, and the moment did not feel right, especially now when all she could think about was Ethan's fingers on her skin.
Ethan took the cue and did not ask any further questions. He pulled a package of wound dressing out of the box and opened the side of the package with his teeth. Gently pressing it on the injuries, he took the tape to secure it into place.
"Let's make sure this does not go anywhere this time", he then spoke lowly and took a big bandage, slowly unrolling it over her side. He leaned in closer, his face just a couple of inches next to hers, and reached around her to roll the bandage over her back and her other side. The warmth that his body radiated onto her skin made her heart beat faster. He drove the bandage around her a few times, right below the band of her sports bra. But the only thing she could concentrate on was his breath grazing the side of her neck. It drove goosebumps over her skin. When he secured the end of the bandage under another layer he lightly placed his hands on her sides and stopped moving.
She prayed for him to stay like this just for a moment longer, so he would not see her flushed face, which she had hidden from him so often already. Her heart was heavily pounding against her chest by now and with his hands on her ribs she knew he could probably feel it. But he slowly pulled his head back, only enough to look into her eyes.
He drove her crazy, he had been from the moment they met, even when she did not want to admit it at first. And now all she could see was that hungry fire burning his eyes which grew brighter by the second. Then he leaned in, placed his lips on hers, and kissed her. He was gentle at first, waiting for Victoria to return the kiss. It only took her a second to give up all restraint and surrender to him. The last thing she saw was his sexy smirk before she closed her eyes and his tongue slowly parted her lips. He let go of her sides and cupped her face with both of his strong hands while he explored her tongue, deepening the kiss with more passion than she had ever felt before.
Her hands drove up his bare chest, then up to the back of his neck so she could pull him even closer. Her head started spinning and her breath quickened as he slowly pushed her back into the pillows. When her injured side hit the mattress, she flinched and a winced moan escaped her lungs.
Then, as suddenly as he had kissed her, he pulled back and pushed himself off of her in a split second.
"Fuck...", he panted, "...I really shouldn't. I am so sorry." He looked into her confused eyes and got back up from the bed, driving his hand through his hair.
"Wait. I'm okay," she insisted, but he was already walking to the door, only turning around when he was standing in it.
"You should get some more rest. I will get us something to eat," he said in his husky voice. His lips drew into his half-sided smile, but it looked forced, a conflict fighting in his eyes. Then, for the first time, he pulled the door half-shut behind him on his way out.
Victoria disappointedly blew out some air and drew her lower lip in between her teeth. She could still feel him on her face, on her sides, on her tongue. Every fiber of her body wanted him back in this bed, and she knew he had felt the same. But still, he drew back and left her alone without a clue what was going on, staring at the half-closed door.
It only took a couple of minutes and she could hear the engine of his car start before he drove off.
She slowly got back up, put the packaging of the wound dressings, which were scattered on the bed, together, and leaned back into the pillows. The adrenaline of the moment was gone and made room for the pain she had felt before.
He returned a while later, carrying bags of groceries with him, acting like nothing had happened between them. The questions in her head stayed unspoken, even when he helped her out of bed to have breakfast.
Days flew by and he had made sure she would get better day by day. He did not give it any room to be awkward, but she knew he had drawn up a barrier she would not overcome anytime soon. It felt distant, but she respected it.