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The things we do

WARNING! TRIGGERING MATURE CONTENT!

Nikolai's POV

My head swirled with thoughts of today's events as I staggered through my bedroom door. Alcohol did nothing to lighten the load on my chest nor the rage I was feeling. I buried my head in my hands as I sat at the edge of my bed. Why had I let him escape? Why did I do something so stupid?

"Why did I..." I swallowed, clutching at my hair with shaky hands. I knew it could not have been helped but I couldn't help but feel so stupid about everything. My chest began to heave once more when I stared at Elle's portrait on the wall. I had failed her. I had failed once more. I let her murderer escape when he was right in front of me.