25 Chapter 25 - A Woman Whose Learn Love, Ai Third + Author Word

Ai Perspective

"Hoshino Ai, I'll make sure you safely deliver two healthy kids."

When the doctor said that to me, for me at the time, it felt like someone finally recognized my conviction. And the doctor really treated me very well—maybe too well, so much so that it felt like favoritism from other patients.

It's just a shame that when it was time for me to give birth, the doctor just disappeared. Although I had hoped that he would be the one to help me during labor. In the end, I gave birth safely.

They were twins, one boy and one girl, the first time I saw them both. It seemed to me like one of the most charming sightings I had ever seen.

When the nurse midwife gave the two newborns into my arms. I was at a loss for words, and my heart was full of feelings that I couldn't put into words. However, my tears did not stop and continued to flow unchecked.

It's hard to explain, but when I held my twins in my arms. The feelings I feel can be expressed in words like…

'I am their mother.'

It was a very mysterious feeling. I don't know if this is a feeling of love or just the natural instinct of a mother. I wonder if every mother feels like this.

To be honest, I prepared myself because I heard a lot about how hard it is to take care of a baby, especially twins. However, what surprised me was how easy it was to take care of the twins. Until I wondered if what I'd heard was just a rumor.

At first, I had a hard time telling the twins apart, but slowly I got used to it, and it became easy and natural for me to tell the twins apart. Especially after a few months, the differences between the two twins began to differ from each other. Ruby was usually more energetic and moved around in my arms before she got tired and quietly slept in my arms. Aqua, on the other hand, was more reserved, didn't move much, and only made quiet noises.

Sometimes I sense that he starts making noises when he realizes that I'm looking at him. Which makes me think that my son might really be a smart boy. Especially when you consider how easy it is to take care of twins. They don't cry for no reason, usually when they're hungry and pooping.

After I started working again as an idol and Ichigo helped me take care of the twins by letting his wife help me, I was able to get back to work. Honestly, I was quite worried about letting someone else take care of my twins. However, I need to keep working as an idol, after all, I hope to achieve happiness as an idol.

Besides, I don't think it's possible that President Ichigo would put someone in charge who would spread my secret and who could also destroy my reputation and career. Strawberry Production could also go bankrupt. I guess not long after that, Ichigo's wife, Miyako, was getting close to the twins.

I don't know what happened, but it felt like her attitude towards the twins changed by a hundred and eighty degrees. In fact, sometimes she would even take her laptop and start working while looking after the twins. She also started talking about some things that I couldn't understand, which basically meant that she started investing his savings in digital money called betcoins or something.

Although I was really busy working and taking care of the twins, I got to experience a lot of new things with them. I felt like I was starting to gain experience with having a family, and one day I started to realize something.

I realized that this world is all about money. Although being an idol was fun, I started to think otherwise, especially about my twins, who would someday need money so that they could experience things.

But sometimes life is full of surprising things… unexpected turns and something outside our expectations.

Yes, being an idol is fun, but sometimes it can be really hard. Especially when what you expect doesn't happen. Even though they have worked hard and attended voice training day and night in order to do her best.

Therefore, even though I worked hard and put on the best performance I could. In the end, I still come across people who speak ill of me... No, that person are probably guessing right through my lies.

It was a message saying that my smile was neither good nor bad. A smile that felt fake.

Maybe that's why when I read the message, it hit me and made me feel a little down than usual.

It was harsh, I thought, since in the end, I was supposed to be a pro, and for them to ask something more than a personal was kind of too much… don't you think. Even though I tried my best to love my fans on my own…

It was therefore unbelievable when I arrived home to find that my twins had prepared something for me. It was a doodled picture of me singing on a stage, and I also attached a crown of flowers to my head.

It seems like they're both worried because I've been feeling down for the past few days. I was really surprised to find out that my kids are quite sensitive to me. I couldn't help but hug them fondly. I put those pictures in a frame, and every time I saw them, I couldn't help but smile and feel the kindness of my child toward me.

Is this what you call love? Which means that my child loves me? I remember there was a time I drew a picture of my mother… but I don't remember if she liked it or not… I wonder if at that time I still loved my mother or if it was just a simple gesture for me. After I grew up, I knew very well that my mother wasn't fond of me, and I don't think I ever tried to gain her attention either.

Well, of course, everyone has different reactions. However, I'm still confused by all these interactions. Is this love or just normal affection for a baby toward their parents… Like those chicks that always follow anyone they see first…

They were both smart and kind children. It made me wonder if they would be okay with having parents like me. Honestly, I was self-aware that I wasn't a normal person. After what I went through with my mother, I was unsure of many things, including my own feelings.

If the two of them were living with a normal family, their lives could have been better than living with me.

Aside from my own problems and the issues that came from my work as an idol. I wouldn't be able to voice their births because of my work, and even now, my finances aren't enough to support the three of us really comfortably either.

When I think about it like that, it puts me in a bad mood, and I think it's good that they grew up in a normal and well-off family. At the same time, however, looking at the doodles of the two of them makes for me making my heart comfortable, and the thought of them growing up with someone else makes my heart ache.

I wonder if this kind of feeling is love or just obsession. I don't know...

It's just that, because of this, I confirmed in my heart that I need to work even harder so that I can take good care of my two children,

Yeah, I need to work harder to make my own happy family…

I may have my own doubts, but once again I stood at the podium, smiling a smile that I counted as one that people would like. Well, that's right... I lied once again. This time with the belief that what I was doing could help create a happy and harmonious family.

I performed with such confidence, until my eyes found something in the row of fans. There were two twin babies dancing along with my fans. It was impossible for me not to notice them.

"Wow..."

"That's kind of cool..."

I heard my teammates being amazed at my two dancing children. I myself was, of course, wide-eyed with surprise, but from my heart came a feeling I rarely felt...

A feeling of joy... and how adorable my children were...

Then, perhaps for the first time, I felt that I was not all by myself in this world.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Author word...

Okay…

I don't know if it's good to say this, but I want to share what happened from my perspective as a writer. I talking like this because I saw the comment on the webnovel "People are starting to rage."

Honestly, I don't write much and the last time I wrote was a smut fanfic about stealing heroine with blackmail and stuff. Then if patr-eon doesn't ask for Id or something like that for verification for +18 content creators. I think I would have continued writing that smut fanfic and not writing this.

Then I thought about making a fanfic without smut or +18 content. Then I've always wanted to make fanfics about idols and hololive things like that. That was before I remembered that the Oshi No Ko anime was coming out and I thought it would be an interesting thing to put together with hololive. This is the reason why I wrote this fanfic.

So when I was about to write this fanfic, I thought of making the beginning of the story with such a Bang... I feel like I have such a good story.. This will be a good prologue and just like OnK... I guess in my mind…. So I wrote this fanfic with that in mind.

But I think when Miyako's chapter is around and I see a comment about filler chapters and too many side characters chapter. Of course, there are comments that this is good, world building and stuff. But I know I messed up… since at that point, I already wrote several chapters ahead and I feel like this will come to be honest.

I checked my other fiction and I found out that even though I used other perspectives people don't complain too much, but it was easy to find out why there's no complaint since usually I just write two or three chapters from another perspective before going back to MC.

And when I realized that. My mind was like 'oh, shit…' this won't end well… It would be great if I spread out the other perspectives like my previous fanfic, but well… I didn't know it would be like this.

In my mind this would be great, but apparently no… It's something to learn. I think one comment said that I write in a short span of time, which is not true at all. I have been writing this for a week. But his point is true, it had been too long for a reader… But I'm the writer not thinking like that, because I already think I will write like this from the start. It was from concept to become a chapter.

So I thought about what I was going to do with this… but well, I have Mubarak and I need to go out of town to meet my family and so on. After I'm back in my town and I just ask my small number of patre–ons what do you want me to do?

Continue with this…

Or just rewrite again. ( I already rewrote two chapters.)

There's a time I think about dropping it, but well, I don't want to do it. So I ask which one in my patreo–n

It's just four people who vote, and two comment, just continue this and let slow down other POV something like that. Yeah, that's something I learned. I don't know what will happen until I write this.

So I will continue… and if people who found this too long. I just said just wait and binge it if you like. I am already really grateful you read this. If you want to drop it. I understand and I told you this would be like this until chapter 28…

I'm really grateful to all of you reading this till this point. I mean to be honest, I never expected to be like this. In my mind, it feels like such a bang… It feels like I want to smack myself in the past… "you're stupid…bastard"

My other thing would be, there's a comment that said I need to erase gary stu and harem focused fanfic because there's nothing about this fanfic that had gary stu or harem.

Well, yeah that's true since the MC is still a kid and to be honest, I'm really writing at such a slow pace. I told several times and I think it had been like that since my previous fanfic. I mean I write 100chapter for MC just fu*k two heroines and just about get the third heroine. That's how slow pace I am. It's a warning. People read my previous fanfic. Some of them already complain about how slow pace I am, but I can't change it… I guess… I just like writing like that…

As for the father, I know you want to kill him fast… or something, but I kind of have my own plan with him.

Ah, the other thing, I see a comment about 'trying to forcibly make a guy a long time villain in a non-fantasy world when the MC is willing to kill and has the resources to not ruin his own life to do it is dumb' when I already put supernatural on this fanfic and I already convince myself with the father and the world in this fanfic… It's supernatural shit… OnK already established about god or star or something like that… So sorry about the father, if you're the one who wanted him to be killed fast. Sorry, this is not that kind fanfic you're looking for…

The last thing I want to say… It's about Kaguya-sama. I said I think I removed her, but I don't think I will. Several characters from Kaguya-sama will be here… and just like I said, I will make them the same age as the MC.

I think that's it…

Ah, also this fanfic is a crossover… for now it's just Oshi No Ko and hololive shortly. But maybe there would be more… which is something I like… A massive harem with a crossover world. I have been writing fanfic like this…

Sorry for the inconvenience. I am grateful to all of you… I just want to address this and what happened to this fanfic. I guess…

Yeah, I think that's it… yeah, that's it…

Btw, how far are usually R-15? Just kissing? And just told that they spent the night together? I'm curious, since I'm a former R+18 fanfic writer…

[author]

A bit late, since I write those author word...

Oh, shit... I forget GI is massive 100 gb... Damn... But I'm back to rabbit hole... I guess.... My gacha vacuum only stay three month... I want nilou....

-------------------------------------

You can support me in patr*ondotcom/Razack2Ch

You can read early access up to 5 chapter in my patr-eon for now.

----------------------------------------

This Fanfic Update, would be daily at 6 P.M +7GMT.

My fanfic will only 1000-1400 word per chapter and don't expect too much.

Beware with cliffhanger. You can binge it if you like too...

[/author]