123 Chapter 4 Sad Reunion

(A/N. Sorry I didn't upload last week, I'm currently dealing with some emotional family shit that I would rather not get into. So yeah, hope you enjoy the chapter and sorry for the late update)

"Now go tell everyone"

"Are you sure you don't want us to help my lad-?" Rai tried to say but I cut him off without any hesitation at all.

"Just go!" I growled, I wasn't in the mood to debate this with him.

"Yes...I understand my lady"

It hadn't been all that long since I got back and had a complete emotional breakdown, I had basically found out what had happened from dad and the others before then leaving everyone to just find a secluded area where I could be alone with my thoughts. I hadn't even told anyone about my adventures or what I had been up to like I had originally planned to, this was very obviously because I was just way too overwhelmed with everything that had happened and I couldn't give a single shit about anything like that at the moment.

I just got done explaining to Rai what had happened, I had called him from the abyss so that he could explain to everyone what had happened without me having to call every single person to come over so that I could explain it to them all myself. Rai had tried to ask if he and my other followers could help in anyway but I had shot that idea down instantly, firstly because I didn't want to drive them into another battle that had nothing to do with them and secondly, this was frankly not any of their business so I had no reason to get them involved.

"FUCK!" The moment Rai left through an abyss gate I punched the tree I was standing next to, easily shattering it in half.

"D-damn it..." I whispered as I slumped to the ground.

Dad had already somewhat filled me in on what had happened, I now knew who had attacked us and I was pissed, no, pissed doesn't even come close to how I was feeling right now. Falmuth, that was the name of the kingdom that had attacked us for some stupid fucking reasons. They had hidden behind the power of that damn barrier that weakens monsters, in fact if it wasn't for that bloody thing they would have been massacred, god, I am getting real sick of barriers at this point.

Anyway, they had also used other worlders to attack us...or summons, it doesn't really matter what they are called. Honestly though, I couldn't care less where they had come from, after all I was going to kill them all either way. In fact when dad had told me that I just straight up laughed, an unhinged and crazed kind of laugh that would probably creep most people out, I had then simply responded by saying this. "I don't give a shit! They could be fucking god himself and I wouldn't give a damn, in the end it will end the same for them all. I'm going to make them watch as I gut their companions alive in front of them." 

There were four of them all together, the summons that is, one was the bastard that killed Zeref, so to put it simply, he was at the top of my shit list. Though for right now I was currently dealing with some more...personal problems, said problems being my current and very unstable emotional state.

(I can barely keep myself together as it is...) even now my emotions were going completely crazy and I was barely able to keep them under control. Actually, the only thing that was allowing me to continue to keep my sanity together was the very small spark of hope that this could be fixed and everyone could be saved.

(It's a long shot but...becoming a demon lord to revive the dead...) I had already been told about the legend, I knew about the very small chance of this actually working the way we wanted it too instead of just transforming the dead into mindless abominations. Still though, even with that possibility I still had hope, there wasn't much but it was there...and even if I was an idiot for thinking that it might be possible I had to at least try.

"If only my soul sight skill was working I might be able to confirm it but noooo! All I get every fucking time I try to use it is an eye full of fuzzy distortions that make any investigation into the subject near impossible" this barrier seemed to be interfering with it somehow making my job a whole lot more annoying. I couldn't make out anything really and even if we destroyed the barrier so that I could use the skill properly I didn't trust myself to be able to grab them all in time if they were actually there.

"And this skill isn't helping, in fact it is just making it even harder for me to focus on literally anything..." I muttered in annoyance as I pulled up the information on my newest skill.

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Miseria, Lord Of Sorrow. Listings sub skills:

Domain of horrors. (The user can create a large area that is within their almost absolute control. The user cannot only control time and space within this domain but can also create incredibly accurate and large scale tangible illusions)

Emotional catastrophe. (The user can manipulate  the emotions of all living things that are within a massive radius around them. If the user does this too much the person's mind that is affected may begin to the great at a rapid rate causing them to go mad)

Mental dominion. (The user can control the minds of anyone they come into physical contact with, this however can be resisted if the opposing party has a stronger will then the users)

Emotional amplifier. (The user can devour the emotions of those around them and use that to increase their own strength. However, if the user is in a state of extreme emotional distress there own emotions will be amplified and they will passively begin to absorb their own emotions to increase their own strength, this effect will end only after the user has dealt with the thing or things that have been distressing them)

Void. (The user can absorb almost anything, even light and matter, the user can literally turn themselves into a black void of nothingness that devours anything around it. The user can also take the skills and abilities of anything they end up absorbing)

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(It's an amazing skill but...sigh, the fact that it increases my emotions is not helping me right now) I thought as I rolled on to my back and looked up at the sky.

(Sure it increases my strength as I passively absorb my own feelings but I'm going to end up completely losing my mind at this rate. I mean seriously, I've already got a mountain of shit that I'm dealing with right now, I do not need even more crap added to it)

"My head is killing me..." I groaned while rubbing my forehead and muttering about how I just wanted to kill something right now.

"Maybe...maybe I shoul-"

"L-lady Suu..." 

The sudden familiar voice took me a little by surprise but when I sat up and turned to see who it was that had called out to me, I recognised them immediately. Yin and Yang were standing not far from me and if I'm being honest, they looked like a complete mess, not that I could blame them. Their eyes were red and puffy looking, their normally nice looking hair was now a complete mess and their clothes looked tattered. Kuro was here too, he honestly looked like he had no idea what to say and seemed to not want to make eye contact with me.

(I really am in a bad state if I didn't even notice them walking up on me) I wasn't angry at them for coming here even though I had said that I wanted to be alone. In fact for a second all the shit I was feeling softened a little bit and my head felt slightly more clear.

"Come here" I said, causing Yin and Yang to immediately run up and tackle me into a hug.

"It's...it's okay" I said, trying my best to comfort them as they cried in my arms.

"I am sorry my lady...I...I have failed you" Kuro said after several seconds of silence, I could tell he was blaming himself for not being able to help Zeref in time.

"No, no you didn't" this made him look at me with sadness and regret clear in his eyes.

"You did not fail me, none of you did" 

"W-w-what ar-are we...what are we gonna d-do now?" Yang asked as she tried and failed to wipe away the tears that were constantly falling down her cheeks.

"I'm going to fix this, I'm going to find a way to bring them back, Zeref, Shion, all of them" I said, already knowing what I had to do.

"H-how?" Yin asked.

"I think we all know the answer to that" the murderous shimmer in my eyes mabe my intention very clear.

"What about Falmuth, the whole kingdom I mean?" Kuro asked through gritted teeth, rage now clear on his face at the simple mention of the name.

"I'm not gonna massacre hundreds of thousands of people just because a few of them decided to attack us...no matter how much I may want to right now" I whispered the last bit but they probably heard it anyway.

"After all, if I did something like that I'd be no better then those fuckers that attacked us" I let out a long sharp breath before continuing.

"However, to all those that have chosen to come here, to those that ordered and orchestrated this attack, to those bastards that came and killed Zeref, Shion and the others..." The aura that surrounded me as I continued was cold, empty, violent and yet also focused at the same time.

"Well...let's just say that I'm going to show them what it is like to drown in your own sorrow"