Two

Faride pushed the hard steel door with the remaining strength she had left. A large building with bright whitewashed walls filled with light blue counters lined up across the shop with different sections of medications greeted her. It was sparsely filled. Perfect, she thought. No hassling in between people and wondering whether they were watching your every move. Without haste, she ran up to the counter. "Hello. Please I need some Paracetamol."

The woman, a middle aged lady in a white shirt and blue knee length skirt looked at Faride up and down with a scowl on her face before turning back to the computer in front of her. "It is against the policy to give anyone medication without a doctor's note." She replied in a thick accent.

Faride bit her lips. Damn it. She wished they could go to the hospital behind their condominium but that was out of the question. "Please. Just one packet. I have to go home now and..."

She cut her, impatiently. "No. I'm sorry. We cannot."

And that was the end of the conversation. Faride nodded and gave a polite smile before walking out of the store. Mama was exactly where she had left her, except she looked more impatient that before. "Have you got it?"

Faride shook her head sadly. "No."

"I told you. Ai it's against their law. Come let's go home. I'll make her a hot chamomile tea. It'll make her feel better."

Faride couldn't imagine what her sister Hajara must be going through now. Paracetamol was the only medication that helped with her stomach cramps. The duo rushed down the crowded street and cutting through stalls as a short cut. Finally they reached the train station. Mama was impatiently wringing her hands. "I pray your dad doesn't get home soon."

Faride muttered an inaudible Ameen. A breeze swept her making her stumble before she regained her composure. She was dizzy already. The journey of going round and round looking for a medication did this to her. Right now, she didn't care whether he arrived before them or not. Even though she should. Papa was a fierce man who was so controlling that he never allowed them do anything on their own. On the train ride, her mind wandered back to her only friend back in Nigeria. Safiya. She was a bubbly personality full of jokes and very friendly. The girl had once told Faride that she shouldn't do anything she didn't want to. "Why don't you try sneaking out?" She had asked.

Faride's eyes widened. "Sneak to where?"

"Ha. Chills. I mean just to go out for some hours o."

"No. That's impossible. I could never do that."

"Of course you can. You just have to summon up the courage."

"It's not so easy."

"You have to stand up for yourself. If not there'll be no way out for you."

What she didn't realise was that Faride was so scared of people to the extent that she couldn't talk to anyone without blabbering or stammering or conjuring up bad things. She was that damaged. Safiya was the only person that Faride felt comfortable enough to talk to. She wished she knew her cousins, or even neighbours. But no. None of her cousins' were allowed to visit. Nor neighbours. Her only family that came to the house was her aunt who mostly came alone and her other uncle and his kids but they were so small. Faride was always happy to see them and played with them as much as possible. Who knew when they would visit again? She and her siblings were locked in the house like dogs. Home-schooled, with no friends. They all had got used to it and saw normal life as strange. Thank God for the internet. If not, they would have been worse than they already were.

So what Safiya was suggesting was simply out of this world. She could never have friends talk less of a boyfriend. It was impossible. These were things she conjured up in her dreams. But in reality, never. The impossibility was simply overwhelming.

A tear slipped across her eye to her nose as she expertly wiped them away. Thank God everyone was busy in the train. Her eyes roamed the families doting on their children when her mom's phone rang. They looked at each other, their hearts in their mouths. Slowly mama took out her small Samsung flip phone that Papa had bought for her and the kids when they arrived six months ago.

Flipping open the phone, Mama sighed heavily. "It's Mrs. Chow."

"Ohh" That meant oh, thank God it's not Papa.

"Hello Ma"

Faride turned back to the window as mama talked with Mrs. Chow. Mrs. Chow was the course coordinator for Faride at college. She called to notify her of any changes or outstanding payment issues. Normally she called Faride but since Faride never bothered to take her phone anywhere with her since an incident two weeks ago, Mrs Chow began calling Mama.

It was late afternoon and Papa had returned home quite early so the kids had forgotten to hide any private things away lest he sees. All of a sudden Faride's phone rang and Papa took it. It was from the school, thank God. But that didn't stop him from bombarding her with questions nonstop. "Why will they call you?"

Faride stammered, "they usually do call when there's an issue."

"Shut up." He stayed quiet for dramatic effect. He usually did this in order to heighten the tension in the room. "Why won't they call your mother? If they only call you then what is her use here? I ask you! You know what happened when we came to this country six months ago. Your mother was supposed to be in the same class as you but because of her bad grades in secondary school, they refused to give her admission. Now she's in a lower class. And now you're saying that they call you? The school? Who do you think you are? Be careful!"

That was the last time that Faride went out with her phone. She didn't want any more trouble from her father.

Faride sighed in deep pain as she jolted back to reality. Her eyes were misty again with unshed years. Mama was telling her what Mrs Chow told her but she wasn't listening. Her eyes were stuck on the happy family opposite to them. If only she could have a happy family like these. She turned towards the other side of the compartment, looking at the jovial people telling each other stories and laughing. They looked like tourists with their backpacks. Her gaze ran along the seats before it settled on a particular pair of light brown eyes looking directly at her.

She startled. Were they real? He was hidden among the compacted group of tourists, but there was no kidding it. He was looking at her. They looked at each other for a few seconds more before Faride quickly averted her gaze back to her hands which were resting on her laps. Had he been watching her for a long time? Did he see her cry? What did he see when he looked at her? A weird looking black girl with teary eyes? Oh God.

The train wheeled to a stop. It was their station. People began filing out through the various doors that opened at the same time. Mama walked out and Faride followed reluctantly. As she stepped out of the train, she felt a strong hand grip her arm. In fear she turned, but only saw the many faces behind her eager to leave. She shook her head and ran up to walk next to mama. Her dizziness had subsided but she wasn't eager to go home. She turned back one last time before she hopped on the slider going down. Those same brown eyes looked back at her. Now, she could see the person behind them clearly. He was tall, dressed in a black suit. Broad shoulders and a clean shaven face. Perhaps he was a gym trainer? She squinted as the slider went down and the man disappeared from sight.

She chided herself for looking at the man for far too long. What if he began thinking she liked him? Or worse, what if he was a dangerous man and went to their apartment? No, no. The condominium was safe. The problem was if she saw him on the street. Ya Allah.

She prayed not to see him again. He looked fierce though she couldn't see his face clearly. So what? There was very little chance she would see him again. Get a grip, Faride and get out of your fantasy world, she told herself. Back to boring life.