58 (NOT A CHAPTER) The Mystic Tea of Kamar Taj

So, it is the next day afternoon and as I read through this monstrosity that I wrote in the early hours of the morning, I am filled with pity for you all as you now have to read through it. It is not even complete but the one good thing that came out of this is I got the idea of creating another snippet thread where I can post my ideas and you guys can tell me if you want a longer format of that same idea.

So, without any delay, read ahead. At you own risk though, Be warned.

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Good day, ladies and gentlemen and whoever else it may be, this is the first of a new series I have just made up. It is called one-shots or snippets.

In this collection, I will be writing anything that comes to my fancy(as if anything I have ever written before had any sort of structure at all). There will be no word count expectations adhered to here. No canonical accuracy, nothing.

Total Anarchy!

So, this is the first installment in the series.

Bear in mind, it is 5.05 AM where I live, as I have started typing this.

And NO! I have not woken up early and started writing this. I have not slept at all and will probably stay up till sunrise.

The idea for this is courtesy of [OMN1CR0N_GAMING] from Web Novel.

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Disclaimer - I don't stake claim to even any of my OCs in this chapter as I don't think it'll be good for my writing career let alone the authentic intellectual property that Disney owns and earns billions off of.

Snippet 1

Technomancer in MCU

Title - The Mystic Tea of Kamar Taj

In the high up mountainous areas of the Himalayas, lay the vaunted Kamar Taj. Its location seemed ever changing and the only reliable way of getting to it seemed to be through the liberal use of sling rings. 

There was a treacherous path with multiple twists and turns reserved as a test for the uninitiated apprentices that wished to visit and learn in the vaunted halls of Kamar Taj.

One such apprentice was trudging through knee length snow towards the mountain peak that he could see but could not reach.

As if he was delirious, he climbed and climbed but did not seem to get any closer to the peak.

He was starting to think that the old man had swindled him.

He chuckled sardonically as he surveyed the state of his clothes. It was not as if he could have fallen any lower.

Unseen to him though, there was a whole cadre of Sorcerers tasked with watching him by the Ancient One.

The old man had fucked off who knows where but he had assigned multiple mid-level sorceres to just observe what this person was doing. "It would help you learn," he had told them.

Sometimes, they wished they could strangle that sorry excuse of a Sorcerer Supreme.

Sure, the man was supremely strong but doing anything beyond being strong was impossible for him. He barely taught three initiates who turned into Masters and then dumped all the responsibility he possibly could on those poor Masters.

And then, he went ahead and gave this person, Mr.Strange, the hardest possible test he could for the initiate.

They had to admit though, he was doing better than most.

Up above them, the Ancient One was doing his best to hide his laughter from the associates below. A suspicious cloud of weed was hovering around him. "Oh, I have got to show this to him later," he said while referring to the struggling form of Strange below. "He dared to call me an old man in the future, he deserves this."

Throughout history, there have been multiple sorcerer supremes but few have come close to attaining the sheer strength that Agamoto wielded and through a combination of luck and hard work, the current Sorcerer Supreme, Yao had come the closest to Agamotto. He had become stronger than all his predecessors.

Let's just say that this allowed him a certain level of leeway when it came to dealing with dimensional entities that possess the strength to swallow the entirety of Earth in a single gulp.

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–Master Wong–

Maintaining the meticulous catalogue of the Library was always a bittersweet chore for him.

On one hand, he loved books and all they represented in Kamar Taj but on the other hand, someone from the long line of Sorcerer Supremes had enchanted the library to be confusing and hard to guide through on purpose and his luck was such that he was blessed with the Ancient One as his Sorcerer Supreme.

The man was supremely talented and could fend off most demon invasions all by himself with both hands tied behind his back but helping him with administrative tasks? He would have better luck asking a Dog to help him glue together the book the Dog had just ripped apart.

Actually, getting a Dog might be good for him. Add some wholesomeness to the monotonous life that was being the Librarian of Kamar Taj.

A Magical Doggy would be even better. If he could find one, though. He had heard from the Ancient One that the fae markets had them but they fetched a pretty penny of the soul. Then again, this was the same man who thought it was funny to visit one of the hell princes and force feed him weed and note down their reactions. "For SCIENCE!" he shouted when asked.

Honestly, the number of people who actually graduated to reach the Masters level had been declining year by year, not because the quality was declining but because there was no need to. 

The Ancient One was so overwhelmingly strong that he had connected himself to the Three Sanctums and subsequently, to the Mystic Shield that covered the entirety of the planet. 

He was but a wee initiate when that happened but he was sure that the man was going to blow himself up from all the magical feedback from the ley lines but somehow, he took control and now? They barely had to work.

The most action he had seen was when some Werewolf got naked in Central Park and they had to scrub everything off the internet.

Nowadays, even the thought of starting a family was passing through his mind. Something that was unthinkable for someone who held the position of a librarian since the position was historically cursed to die alone.

He completed the tasks for the day and noted that it was still time till his lunch break so he decided to visit the one place that the Ancient One could take credit for, the Mystic Tea plantation.

Using his sling ring, he opened a portal to the London Sanctum where the scent of weed was the strongest.

"Wong! Nice to see you, my friend. Come-come-come, my friend. We were just about to begin a new joint. Join us!" came the rough gravelly voice of Master Daniel.

He smiled and was about to deny when he also smelled the tea and not just any tea, the tea that the Ancient One kept in his personal collection.

His refusal turned into delighted acceptance in an instant, "Well, if you insist."

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Kaecillius

Watching their Lord and Saviour, Lord Dormammu rage at the unfairness of the situation was equally heartbreaking and amusing.

Especially, since he could see three copies of his Lord pacing around his altar, leaving burn marks in it. But that could just be the mystic weed talking.

If he was asked to name the best thing that happened to him ever since his family died, it would be selling his soul to Lord Dormammu.

Not only did it stave off Death completely and even enhanced his mystical prowess, the access he gained to the weed garden alone was worth it to be branded like a cattle.

After being gatekept from the Mystic Tea Plantation of Kamar Taj, he was down on his last knees when his Lord came to his rescue and offered to give him the original version of the weed and not the watered down version that the Ancient One gave to the visitors to calm down their nerves.

Just as he was about to take another puff from the sacred roll, a tearing sound heralded the opening of a tear in the very dimension of the Dark One.

With a furious roar, "Who Dares?", his Lord roared and swiped his hands towards the tear, sending an energy wave that would eviscerate the unfortunate soul that was on the other side of the tear.

"Hey, man. Why the hate?" came a laid back husky voice and then he watched with transfixed awed eyes as a burning bike came into view with none other than Snoop Dogg riding on it, with a cigar in his mouth and another joint in his hand.

Somehow, he was sleeping on the bike as he smoked and the bike rode a path of fire that it laid for itself and after making a few downhill turns, landed in front of his Lord.

Though, objectively speaking, his Lord looked much less cooler than Snoop Dogg.

"Why have you come here, Ghost Smoker?" his Lord growled out.

Snoop raised his hands in mock surrender and said, "just chill, man. I ran out of my supplies a while ago and couldn't find any on the market so thought of going wholesale this time, you know? Those retailers give me mixed bullshit half the time so getting some from the source seemed like a good idea. So, you selling or what?"

His Lord growled out in frustration at Snoop's fearlessness in front of the Dark Overlord but it was understandable as opening a portal in the Dark Realm without his Lord's permission would require immense power, power that would place both of them in the same echelon.

Huh, echelon. What a funny word!

"Begone, thief. I don't need to entertain another one of your kind. If you desire it so much, steal it from the thief who stole multiple seeds from me and has started his very own business, undercutting me by using his organisation's unpaid skilled labour that I just can't seem to get in this accursed place."

"Say no more. I get it. Here, this might help calm you down," Snoop said as he offered his Lord his joint that seemed to leave out starlight instead of smoke.

What he wouldn't give to smoke that joint?

His Lord took the offered joint with visible reluctance.

"Now, don't you worry. When I took this title, I thought I was supposed to do something about justice so I will do that now. I'll make sure they shut down their business so you can thrive yours. I just hope you'll offer me a discount when it matters."

With those words, he literally burst into starlight, blinding me briefly.

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–Ancient One–

He was tending to his babies in his personal tea or should he call it, weed garden. 

Ha, he still laughed when he thought about the face Dormmamu made when he offered his very soul for a few seeds of his choice.

That motherfucker didn't know what hit him. Now, he has both the powers and Dormammu's interdimensional business will soon be in his hands as well.

As he was using another one of his spells to maintain the watering ratio, he heard a voice behind him, "So, Yao. I've come to bargain."

His pupils contracted as his hairs stood on end. It had been centuries since someone had managed to sneak up on him.

With a spell ready, he plastered a fake smile on his face and turned around, only to see Snoop Dogg himself sniffing his precious plantation.

He held in the urge to blast him away from his personal garden.

This was a life or death scenario here. He couldn't afford to let his emotions get the better of him.

"What can I do for you, Avatar of the smoke?"

"Oh, nothing. I was wondering how much of a discount I would get on your merchandise if I could provide you evidence of your competitor employing unfair means to target your business? I mean, the interdimensional trade authority would be more than happy to register your case should you have evidence, right?"

His eyes literally had stars in them at that piece of news.

WIth a determined glint in his eyes, he asked Snoop about the evidence.

Oh, Dormammu was so busted.

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Man, I am so so sorry.

If you have read this far, I commend you for your patience and resilience and thank you for your sacrifice.

On a lighter note, I'll see you guys on Thursday.

Toodles!

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