Chapter『62』 - Hello Darkness, my old friend!

7400 words. Another longest chapter. Woohoo!

It was dark. Really dark.

Within this void of impenetrable darkness, I found myself suspended, adrift amidst its harrowing obscurity. It was an abyss devoid of reflection—a blackness so absolute that I could not discern movement from stillness.

All that encompassed me was this void, devoid of sensory input—no sounds reverberating, no flavours lingering, no scents wafting, and no textures gracing my touch—a vacuum that swallowed everything—sights, sounds, scents, and touch—leaving me with nothing but a profound sense of isolation. I was enveloped in an eternal void, where silence was my sole companion.

Initially, there was a tranquillity to this boundless, obsidian expanse. I felt a peculiar sense of both insignificance and universality. I felt as though I occupied both the infinitesimal and the infinite simultaneously. I was a mere speck, insignificant in the grand cosmos, yet, paradoxically, I also sensed that no existence existed beyond my own—like the creator of a domain—like a God in his universe.

But as time elapsed, fragments of my identity returned. I recollected that I was human—a creature of flesh and bones, with appendages to manipulate the world. Nevertheless, I could not sense anything, no matter how hard I tried. My attempts to curl my fingers or wiggle my toes proved fruitless, as did my efforts to stimulate my senses by flaring my nostrils or parting my lips. There was an eerie absence of sensation, an inability to even perceive the rhythm of my own breath.

Uncertainty and coincidences were the scariest things I knew. And I had exactly started to feel the prior. It began to grip me, creeping through my consciousness without any physical manifestations that I had grown accustomed to. No racing heartbeat, no hastened breaths, no trembling limbs. Although I had learned to keep them steady most of the time, I had experienced them twice. And even now, certain things triggered them. The last time it happened was when I... died and was trapped into a familiar place. However, right now, what I was experiencing was much more... impactful, than before. I was not able to express , but right now, I couldn't even feel my sole emotion—curiosity.

In fact, I yearned to feel fear, to experience anything that would validate the existence of something beyond my own consciousness. Yet, I remained trapped, the passing of time slipping away unmarked. I grasped at every conceivable method to retain my sanity. I tried to scream, but the sound was swallowed by the unyielding darkness. I attempted to bite my own tongue, seeking some semblance of sensation, yet it was an exercise in futility.

The sensation was weird, and I couldn't really wrap my head around it. I had reached the Integration stage on my secondary core while my primary core was still on white stage, pumping mana into each and every mana vein and vessel—providing a 24/7 exposure of mana to my body, resulting in making it as sturdy as the asuras.

The basic disparity between asuras and human's body composition was because of this core reason. Because no human reached the integration stage on their own, they were never able to gain access to physiques like this—let alone their future generations—hence in extension; humans, elves and dwarves didn't have a specific mana type like Force-type mana for the Pantheons.

Within the vast expanse of my dormant mind, elusive memories danced tantalisingly close, yet forever eluding my grasp, akin to delicate mirages shimmering on the periphery of my consciousness—teetering at the precipice of my hypothetical tongue—only one person revolved in my mind—Ellie.

As the sluggish passage of time wove its intangible web, it started to feel like an enigmatic phantom when I tried to decipher its rhythm—whether it careened with the fleetness of a shooting star or meandered languidly like a sluggish river through the boundless void—it remained indifferent.

Then, a subtle tremor coursed through my arm, initiating a delicate prickle that shattered the shroud of indifference veiling my senses. The sensation, hitherto alien and forgotten, emerged like a whisper of life in the midst of desolation, electrifying my being. It felt foreign yet eerily familiar. I could feel... albeit pain, but I could still feel.

Then they morphed. The sensation that started as a mere prick morphed into a feeling akin to being stabbed by knives and daggers. It felt as if my whole body had been mutilated with projectiles and then pinned against a wall. Like how announcements are generally pinned to a board in a school—crucified.

Quite ironic.

The sensation didn't stop there as it felt like it had been lit on fire. Especially my sternum. If I existed on a material plane, it was safe to say that my core had broken. I wasn't sure as to what the reason for it was. The integration stage being unstable because of me having two cores or some other reason. Everything lies in obscurity for now.

With bated breath, I awaited the next crescendo of torment, yearning for the searing needles that would mercilessly invade every pore—not in a masochistic way of course for those having second thoughts. Kind of reminds me of Horikita stabbing me with her compass. They would've felt like this as well, if she was a male.

And so, I willingly succumbed to the macabre ballet of this suffering, embracing the twisted liberation that thrived amidst the crucible of torment. The symphony of pain was the sole thing affirming my tangible existence amidst the aeons of subjective nothingness.

Amidst all of this, my environment was getting more and more light. It might be because of the subjective lack of time that made me feel like I was in that void for centuries but I noticed it just now. All of this is just like what happened to me 17 years ago... minus all the Horikita-styled compass stabs.

Was I reincarnating again? No, the notion is absurd enough for me to not consider it again.

Was it Sylvia's doing? It was possible since she had tampered with my core.

A haze accompanied by a familiar fog infiltrated my vision. The same fog I had seen when I was reincarnating. The familiar lamp flickered as the thunder rumbled in my ears and I felt myself—my past self standing in the middle of the street, my boots stained in blood as I drove it into Yagami's solar plexus, slowly churning and twisting it. His face had a defeated look, a look I had seen before as well. A look of horror as he looked at me helplessly, unable to do anything. The rest of his collaborators were on the ground, some reeling in pain while others unconscious, lying in their own blood and dirt from the rain—faces caked in mud beyond recognition.

"Are you satisfied?" The past me asked as Yagami's face twisted in anger.

"Is this all a game to you?" He asked, his voice overcoming the booming thunder in the distance.

"I don't think of an activity like this as anything but a waste of time. You're nothing but a disappointment." I spoke.

My vision got hazy and the next thing I knew I was on the road... in the rain. Alone. There were no fifth generation White Room members' bodies. No Yagami. No one. Just me, blood pooling beneath me as my head punctured with a bullet in its centre lying in Ichika's lap.

I remember now. The meek interference in my memories had disappeared by now.

I died... because of Kei.

She had come back to help but ended up being in the way. Had I grown soft towards her? Logically, it was a bad decision, to put her ahead and myself in jeoprady. So why did I go to rescue her? Why did I even considered her as something that could be used as a bargaining chip? As soon as I entertained the thought of thinking about it, I let go of it. There was no use dwelling over it. She was a mistake in the past. A mistake I can't afford to make again.

The mist cleared and the scene changed. I felt a needle in my eye... my eyes! I could feel it again. While all I felt was a constant sting like someone had stitched my eye shut, I could still feel it. The feeling of subjective nothingness where I could only feel my consciousness was no more. I could feel it... my paralysed body. Or rather my body that my brain was trying to get accustomed to. I could feel my muscles twitch, trying to somehow get up.

I let out a deep breath and willed all of my force into prying my eyes open. My eyelids were heavy and they stung, but I opened them at last. At first I blinked them a few times, the static white in front of my eyes feeling like a lightning bolt had flashed in front of me—making my eyes see nothing but a plain, directionless white while my ears heard nothing else than slightly aggravated beats of my heart.

I moved my face—only marginally—the cramp in my neck making it feel like it would snap with the slightest of motion. Like a meek autumn leaf. However, I moved my face, still, rubbing my eye against the fabric in my shoulder. I could hear the squelch as I rubbed it, as if fresh liquid was being wiped and absorbed into the fabric, making the skin below wet.

Slowly, but surely, my vision started to return to me, one painful wave at a time. It had been a while since something had hurt this much. My breath came out a little ragged, blowing a few strands of hair away.

Strange. They weren't supposed to be this long.

When I finally, truly, opened my eyes, I shut them again. The subsiding brightness of light in contrast with the cold and dark ambiance of the place I was lying in helplessly sent a tremor of migraine, forcing me to close my eyes. After a deliberate little while, I opened them fully.

The first thing my eyes saw after opening for the first time in what felt like aeons was the corner juncture where the weathered cobblestone wall seamlessly melded with the cool, sleek surface of the grey marble below. The air around me remained static with an unsettling silence, disrupted only by my shallow breaths.

And there, in that macabre convergence, my gaze met a rather peculiar sight—a gruesome tableau etched in the dried, rust-hued stains of blood—the splatter shaped blood stains had turned brown, evident I had been here for some while now, convulsing and spasming that resulted in the irregular amoeba shaped blood stains.

The amount of blood dried there was concerning. I wasn't feeling drained hence all of that blood can't be mine. I moved my neck again—ignoring the creaking sound like that of a rusted hinge of a door. It seemed like an altar, where beasts were slaughtered. Once again, a harrowing sensation invaded me, my hair standing on their edge. There was uncertainty in my condition that made me feel this way, the uncertainty of some mana beast standing behind me, drooling as it waits for me to wake up.

The only assurance in this situation was that I was alive... and breathing.

I looked at my outstretched arm. It was quite different than before. Pale and much more muscular.

The veins inside my arms felt subtly more visible—like my skin had turned translucent. The veins shimmered in and out of life, everytime I tried to move my body, forming a small, subtle glow beneath my skin.

And upon the deathly pale, cold skin were rune marks, the marks that appear only when I activated Realmheart. They were not shimmering or pulsating with life, like they usually do. They lay on my skin like an extension of my body. I could feel a connection to them, a permanent one. Like they had etched on my skin for good and had gone into a hibernating state.

My attention suddenly went towards my cores...

It was a little baffling at first sight. My primary core had shattered completely, the little fragments suspended in the little confined place just beside my heart. But since my internal organs received the most exposure, it was safe to say that my heart was safe from any kind of problems this could entail. I had expected this to happen. I had no way of knowing what would happen after White Core. The amount of information Sylvia and my own research gave me was restricted until White Core.

'Even we do not know of the intricacies of the Integration stage in detail. But you can find it out yourself. I believe in you.' Those were Sylvia's words when we talked about it. Calmly, I reached out for my secondary core. Rather than finding a fragmented core, I didn't find anything. It was as if the core never existed in the first place.

I sighed and took in a deep breath, brimming my lungs with air.

Looking at my arm, I curled my fingers. I was slowly regaining control. Gingerly, I reached for mana. I could feel it. The ambient mana. It was all around me. The mana amount was meagre but I could syphon it. The so-called "legacy of mana" was powerful because she could use ambient mana to weave and conjure spells without pulling them inside her core. In addition to her own mana pools which were beyond abnormal and defied the norms, her mana was surely never supposed to run out.

While I can't do exactly what she does, I could replicate it. However, a replica can't be like the original. I reached out for the ambient mana. As soon as I tried to do it, motes of mana started to become visible. It was just like realmheart—grey, monotone world with only motes that one could see was of mana and aether. But there was something different about this place.

Low amounts of mana and an absurdly high amount of aether.

It almost seems like... Relictombs.

"Oi, how long are you just going to sleep there and talk to yourself? Don't you want to greet your companion who's got a bigger schlong than you?" A foreign voice spoke. However, I remained stationary and continued to move multiple regions of my body. My fingers curled and uncurled repeatedly, so did my toes. My arms were regaining their strength and the motor control that I had momentarily lost due to the time spent in that void came back to me.

Pushing the ground with both of my hands, I stood up. The ground was hard yet slippery, cold yet warm as I pushed more and more. The ground felt much below as I looked down. If I had to describe it, I'd say I had gained a few inches overnight. I felt a bit off-balance, feeling like a heavy-metallic knight-armour had been placed on me, making every movement more uncomfortable than the last. As I stood up and looked at my fingertip, I could see the ambient mana burn into flames, turn into a ball of water, a chunk of dirt and a little gust of wind.

It wasn't my own mana. It was ambient mana. Turning ambient mana into spells was something I couldn't do before, yet, now it felt as easy as breathing. As soon as I stopped my influence over mana, my vision returned back to normal.

"Hmm, mana triggers it automatically," I thought out-loud before another grumble resonated from behind me.

"Ignoring a perfect existence like me? How rude."

I looked over my shoulder, from the corner of my eye, "You finally manifested, huh?"

"You bet! Guess who's crawled out of the depths of your metaphorical ass? Oh heavens, it was actually deep, muahahaha. Nontheless, It's none other than yours truly, the asuran weapon extraordinaire, designed exclusively for your 24/7 self-deprecating self. I've transcended perfection itself, and I'm here to rock your and your enemies' world—if they're women, I can rock them in bed as well," the little boy introduced himself as he continued on with his banter, "Brace yourself for an explosion of awesomeness as I strut my stuff by your side. Consider yourself lucky to have me, the ultimate embodiment of coolness, at your beck and call. Even the gods would crush their balls in envy and the goddesses would spill their boobas out in the presence of my true divinity. Call me Sexy Regis." He finished his introductions by poiting his index fingers in a gun like shape towards me.

To say I was disappointed would be an understatement. I was expecting some kind of "Excalibur" when Wren mentioned an ultimate weapon, not a little boy who seemed just older than Sylvie. A bit taller than her, he had bright amethyst hair and void eyes. His eyes colour was pure black and spirals went all through them. Looking in his eyes for a prolonged period of time made me a little dizzy as they resembled a never ending void.

"Don't make that face. How dare you be disappointed in a creation like me? Don't you dare pout! How can you be anything but over-the-moon ecstatic to have someone as incredible as me on your team? Your disappointment is downright criminal!"

"I didn't say anything though." I replied with a straight face. My facial muscles seemed more lax than before, the stiffness I had in my expressions before barely perceptible now.

"I am literally you. I am made up of you, Sylvie, Sylvia and Uto. I know everything you've done until now." He explained as he jerked his head, his short, neatly-combed amethyst hair fluttered.

It was quite new for me. Although I knew the acclorite was constantly sucking my mana, making me only at 75% of usual power, I didn't know he could read everything.

"Let me guess. You're still trying to tell yourself nothing that's happening here was in your plans, right?"

"I mean, I don't." I replied with a shrug of my shoulder—they felt heavy.

"Well, you might make yourself believe that. But I know how you've set the two princesses on the lance route. Pushing lances to their brink. Leaving hints to momm- Arisu about the dwarven rat. The little gift at the wall and in the Elshire forest. I know everything. So stop convincing me otherwise. You can lie to anyone but me." He explained as I let out a tired sigh.

"Well, Sylvia did say something about a transmission once I reached the Integration stage. Let's see what that is about." I said in a resigned way and sat down, trying to think about the Integration stage.

"Well, at least you know what happened to your body, yes?" Regis asked as he sat beside me. He was a sentient weapon bonded to me. I didn't know how to call him a weapon since I wasn't aware of his powers as of now. I guess I just have to figure them out on the way out of here.

"Yeah." I replied.

"Your body has now fully integrated with Sylvia's will. She gave you her essence which in extension makes you her copy. When I went inside you when you were humping the floor with your convulsions, I found out that your body is almost draconic now." He started his explanations.

"I don't think I talk this much, nor is my language this crass." I interjected as he looked at me with a deadpan face, "Dude, I literally told you a while ago that I am made using your mana, Sylvie's scale, Sylvia's feather and Uto's mana. Most dominant traits come from direct mana absorption. Hence I have you and Uto both in me... well, that sounded suggestive but who's noticing that." He started a string of rambles before coughing and returning to his explanation again.

*cough*

"Well, as I was saying, your body is pretty much draconic now. You have the Realmheart runes as a permanent part of your body. Everytime you use mana, your hair and eye colour changes along with the glowing of your runes. However, the runes require a threshold so you don't have to worry about lighting the room up because you used a little help."

I had expected the draconic will to integrate completely but to think, I'd get her physique as well.

"Now, going to the main topic," Regis said as his expressions stiffened and he started to float in the air, his form inverted as he looked at me while being upside down, "the reason why you can use mana but can't feel your mana core is because your core exploded."

The urge to mentally facepalm myself rose in my gut as he snickered. "Ehmm, ok, this time for real. Your core is still there. It just expanded." He spoke and pointed towards my chest, "the natural response is to look at your sternum or chest when you think of the core right? Well, the prior concept of core being a sphere doesn't apply on the Integration stage. On the broader spectrum, your whole body has become a mana core."

I looked down and clenched my fist, calling every element to myself.

Lightning popped, Ice flakes fell, gravity turned and sound waves formed.

Conjuring every deviant—even which I had difficulty with started to feel as natural as breathing.

"Well, as for your primary core... it's gone for good." Regis said with a nonchalant shrug, mirroring mine. "A mana core is storage of mana and to filter impurities. Since your whole body is a mana core now, it saw the primary core which is at White stage as an impurity and removed it. While removing it physically was impossible, it just shattered under the brute force." He explained.

There must be something more to the Integration stage than just the body becoming a vessel for containing mana. If this is all there was to the Integration stage, what were the dragons trying to understand in such a simple phenomenon.

"Now, I have bad news and good news."

"Let's hear the bad one first."

"Since I am such a perfect weapon, I am fueled by aether. I sucked just a little aether from you which helped me to sustain this form using the insight you gained from relics that you received while adventuring." He explained as I started to comprehend the nature of the weird keystone.

"Your weapon, Dawn, she can awaken too although she needs a predetermined mix of aether and mana. If you're able to calibrate the amounts accurately, she can acquire a human form as well since she is sentient as well."

I continued to silently absorb everything he was saying, "So the bad news in all of this is that I'd need more aether to stay in this form, lest I return to a form that is downright criminal for someone like me."

"I'll think something about it." I assured him, trying to get him off me.

"Ehem, ehem." A familiar voice echoed in the walls of my ears.

Sylvia. It was her message.

"And the good news is... Sylvia is still alive. I can feel her."

I turned my head to him, "I know."

Regis smirked, his lips curling into a vile grin, "I know that as well. Just wanted to hear you say that."

He replied as I turned my attention to Sylvia's recorded message.

Well, the war would be reaching a critical phase now. I hope my plan works. Yeah, I hope. Nothing is ever so certain. My plan can fail as well.

(Tessia Eralith)

The crisp aroma of burning dry leaves mingled with the gentle crackling of twigs that seeped into the fabric of my campsite and nudged me awake. Groggily, I released a yawn, stretching my arms above my head, trying to shake off the remnants of sleep and the lingering fatigue from the patrol shifts at night.

"Hehe, you're like a cat," a playful voice spoke, causing me to startle and turn towards the source. There sat Caria, an infectious grin on her face, perched right beside my sleeping gear. "You were calling out someone's name." She whispered suddenly.

Caught off guard, I jerked to the side, my gaze locking with Caria's. A sudden heat flushed my cheeks as her words registered in my mind. In a flurry of denials and flustered stammers, I attempted to explain away the unconscious murmurs that had slipped through my dreams. "I-It-It's not what you think. It must be an accident. No... you must've heard someone e-else." I managed to stutter, my hands waving in frantic denial.

Caria's laughter burst forth like a bubbling brook. Clutching her abdomen, she wiped away a tear of mirth, her eyes sparkling with affectionate amusement. "Hahaha! I was just teasing you, Tessia," she reassured, her voice laced with genuine warmth. She leaned in closer, clasping my shoulders with a comforting touch. "I thought you had changed, but you're still the kind-hearted girl I've always known."

Wrapping me in a tender embrace she whispered subtly, "I am sure he will be back. Don't lose hope."

"Thanks, Caria." I muttered silently, under my breath, unsure of her words and unsure in myself. Even if it was true, I didn't want to believe it. Sometimes, I really envied Arisu, how she could not bat an eye to all that was happening. I tried hard to be like her, but it ended up making me more hollow and sadder than before.

"Make sure to give him one hell of a time when he returns." She winked.

I felt a shiver run down my spine as I remembered his face, his eyes that always made me tingle.

J-Just because he looked scary...

I shook my head and got rid of my useless thoughts. I have been in denial of my feelings, waving these off and not considering them since he never showed a single shred of love towards me. But I've had enough. He was the one who taught me many things. And one of them was to do anything to achieve my goals... no matter what happens.

Once these battles are over in our favour... I will find him!

(Arisu Watsken)

I feel something.

It feels... strange?

It's not comparable to what people would generally refer to as "heartbreak", but I couldn't help but feel something pressing against my chest. It wasn't anything that was hindering me in any way, but I just couldn't sit straight. I had to somehow distract myself with something.

Everytime. It happens everytime I sit still. There is just one thought on my mind...every time.

Really strange. I can't really wrap my head around it.

Sitting on a chair nestled in the high confines of one of the watchtowers inside "The Wall", my gaze swept over the forest that extended for hundreds of miles in front of my eyes. Nothing but high trees and birds flying over them. One could even perceive this situation, no, this scene as a soothing one, providing comfort to both eyes and the soul. Even if one were to ignore the battalion upon battalions of Alacryans' mutated beasts and foot soldiers in the mix, it could still be classed as something that would provide a momentary escape from the mind-numbing reality.

But despite this, all I felt was an endless emptiness muddled by the uncanny heaviness on my chest, like a whole truck had been placed on it.

I heaved, taking in a laboured breath. It trembled with a foreign pace, something I wasn't used to.

Grief? Genuine sadness? Disappointment?

I wasn't sure what I was feeling right now. There was a torrent of emotions in me... so much that the only thing I could perceive from it was that I wasn't feeling anything at all.

Sounds confusing, right?

Definitely not something I would expect from myself. But then, again, lately, nothing I do is something I would've ever expected from myself.

I took in another quavering breath; the humid air vitiated by the smell of sweat, grime and stench of mutated beasts—their body rotting from the inside in exchange for the frenzied power they gained by whatever medicine was fed to them by the Alacryans. The stench loomed over the whole place like mephitis, making an unpleasant feeling bubble in the back of my throat.

"Ah, you're here," A voice interrupted my thoughts as I looked back from the chair I was sitting on.

"Kathyln," I greeted her and motioned for her to sit beside me. She nodded and walked over to the spare chair beside me, a hand-reach away from me due to the small table between the two chairs. There were two cups neatly placed on either side of a kettle—a small container of sugar beside it. "Fancy some tea?"

She looked at me with a blank look and nodded meekly. Her upper lip overlapped the lower lip on the right side as she nibbled on it, the look in her eyes distant and unsure—full of doubt that veiled the usual confidence in her straight gait. "Yes, please."

I kept my eyes on her as I poured in the tea from the kettle that had red spider lily carved on it. "Sugar?"

"4, please." She replied, this time her voice timid and trailing off and then completely disappearing away as the wind whisked her loose hair away.

Well, that's a lot of sugar. Never mind.

Handing the cup to her, I shifted in my seat and looked down as Dicathians got ready for the battle. "There isn't much time. If there is something on your mind, you should just say it." I initiated the conversation. Looking at her I saw her hands around the hot cup tighten, her fingers turning white on the outside and red on the inside due to how hard she was gripping on the cup full of boiling hot tea.

"You won't hinder me from fighting in the war, would you?" She asked with her eyes peering into mine, the usual cold look replaced by a burning passion. There was a subtle harshness in her gaze, wild but tamed.

"Why do you want to participate in the war so much?" I asked. "I brought you here to help but I do not get why you would so eagerly want to participate in a losing battle."

She stayed silent for a while and took a sip from the tea. Clicking her lips that were now sticky due to the amount of sugar in it, she looked up and smiled. She looked different than usual. "Maybe to feel normal?" She replied with rhetoric as I kept looking at her. She extended her hand in front of her eyes and the sun, blocking it and spoke again, "you can understand it too, right Arisu?"

"..."

"People might die for special treatment... like you got, like I grew up with, but..." she paused and looked down, placing one hand below the cup and curling her index around the handle, "sometimes you just wish you could be normal."

Ah, so that is what she meant. Can I relate? Can...

...HE relate? Is this how he feels as well?

"It's suffocating at times." She continued to talk, "knowing your abilities would one day hurt someone unknowingly. Becoming someone's subject of admiration, hate or envy. I don't want others to get close to me because of stature as a princess or as a strong mage." She looked at me with a glint in her eyes, "You think Arthur felt the same?"

I was suddenly taken aback as she took his name.

There it was again.

The subtle, barely perceptible yet crushing weight on my chest. Was it my conscience? Or in the process of teasing him I actually...

"I do not think he cares much," I replied with a shrug.

Kathyln let out a giggle, placing a hand on her mouth, "Well, you're right on that one," she replied and got up, "Thanks for your time... and the tea, of course."

"You're welcome." I replied and stood up as well. As I was about to pass by her, I stopped, "As long as you keep your distance from the front lines, you can participate."

Her eyes widened, "Do you mean..."

"Well, that is what your dad, Council-member Blaine Glayder said. You're free to interpret it the way you want." I replied and she nodded ferociously.

"If that is what he wants, I'd do that." She replied and ran off. I stayed back and picked up my bright red coat from the chair and slipped into it.

"Ethan?" I reached out for my bond as I placed my hands on the walls of the watchtower.

"Yes, mama?"

"How's Sylvie?" I asked. I had left Ethan with her since they seemed to be around the same age. Although, normally, they'd just start fighting but due to the loss of her bond, Sylvie has been in isolation ever since and hasn't spoken a word, absolutely oblivious to her surroundings.

"Well, she..." Ethan paused, "she's the same as before. She hasn't spoken much. I was able to push some bread down her throat but that's it."

Talk about being violently considerate.

"And what about the Leywins?"

"Well, they are pretty miserable as well. The mother cries all day and the father is barely holding on to his sanity as well. The sister seems to have broken out of it. But that seems like a facade. Every day she trains until she suffers from mana depletion and then cries in her sleep."

I looked down at my feet...

Somehow... I could tell how they felt.

"Do you want me to help you, mama?" Ethan's voice reached my ears like he was just beside me, his emotions trickling like a drizzle in a summer morning.

"Thanks for the offer but I want you to stay with the Leywins and Sylvie. I'd be fine."

"Mama! I miss you. Can't you take me with you? I can fight you know." Ethan countered, trying to persuade me into letting him come along with me.

"I know. And this is why I need someone strong enough with the Leywins." I replied, a meek attempt in order to not let him come here.

A moment of silence lingered like winter's mist between us, "Mama? Do you miss him?"

I would be lying if I said I was not taken aback by the sudden question. I wanted him around so I could see for myself how great the revered false genius was. But somehow, along the way, without me knowing I had grown attached to him. What was the thing about him that made me this way?

Certainly wasn't his face that was more rigid than a rock. Yep, definitely not.

And neither did he show any response to my many teasings... much to my own disappointment. I wish I could've elicited a response. But, did I actually miss him or was I disappointed in him for falling that easily.

Or even more disappointed in myself for failing in the only real task he had given me?

I had no way to tell. It's just like how our conversation went one time. When I asked him did anything actually scared him.

'I am a human. So yes, I do feel fear. Although the disparity comes in the nature and source of fear. For me, there's only a handful.' Was his reply. I can somewhat understand what he meant now.

Uncertainty.

That was the sole thing that scared him.

And I could feel it in my own bones as well. Like freezing blades, digging into my skin and scratching against my bones. Uncertain about whether I actually failed in saving him or was all of this a part of what he had always planned.

If this is all in his plans... doesn't this mean I have been dancing right in the palm of his hands all this time? Hasn't he already proved that he is the one true genius among both of us.

I was uncertain.

I was unsure.

And that's why I can't let him end everything just like this.

"Arisu Watsken," a voice interrupted my thoughts, much to my displeasure. Unbeknownst to me, I rolled my eyes unconsciously and turned to face the person standing behind me.

"Trodius Flamesworth," I greeted the man with his full name, looking at a parchment that had his details on it. While I won't do anything to use my resources to look into a man like him, his position since the war started has increased, thanks to the fact that he was basically the Head of The Wall, granting an astronomical boost in power to him.

"As much as I dislike little commoners, especially a little kid like you to call me—the head of a noble house such as House Flamesworth itself, by my full name, I think I have to put up with you for a while." He replied and I could feel a burning sensation inside me to push him into the depth of my new spell.

"It seems like your 'expertise' in warfare was deemed inferior enough in the eyes of higher-ups. Otherwise there would be no way Commander Virion would give me authority that overrides yours. To a "little kid" in this case." I replied, keeping my composure while letting out a small grin.

The vein popped on his temple, throbbing in sync with his awfully visible emotions—anger, and his voice raised subtly. "I will not be talked down to by a Little girl. Of commoner blood at that." He replied and got closer to me, his form looming over me. Despite trying to act menacingly intimidating, I couldn't help but see him like an infirm arrogant man—akin to a scarecrow but in an eagle's zone. His chosen methodology to coerce or intimidate me by acting high and mighty was debile—lacking any sort of real substance.

"Oh yeah?" I raised a brow at him and got close to him. "But you HAVE to listen to what I say, yes?"

He raised his head, pointing his nose up towards the sky and looked down at me—another pity-inducing attempt at establishing superiority over me, "I will not listen to whatever folly you've planned. A brat as young and especially as mud-blooded as you should know their place and have the true entitled ones do the job in the best interests of the continent."

"Fufu~ Best interests?" I asked with a sneer and looked at him, taking another step forward. "At least lie properly. Your greed is almost palpable. It's making me shiver." I replied with a smile while faking a shiver.

Suddenly I felt mana condense around his fingertips of the left hand while he grabbed me by the collar of my turtleneck. "Do not forget your place."

"Seems like I hit a nerve, fufu." I stayed calm, my own mana actively gathering behind him. He could've been a decent mage because of the noble lineage and the resources provided to him, but his creativity seemed to be extremely bland, not knowing what was happening around him.

"I will advise you one last time, brat. Stop messing with me."

Now he looked genuinely mad. Was he really Jasmine's father? Well, since a compromising daughter like Jasmine left the house and is unwilling to be called Flamesworth, it's natural he is like this. But is he really leading the Flamesworth house? Letting provocations of someone more than half his age. Fufu, maybe I should mess around with him.

"And if I don't?" I pushed a little further and this time orange flames manifested around his left hand.

"Hmm. Orange flames? Not bad. You'd need more than that to burn me." I replied and his flames flickered out of life. Surprised, his hold over my collar receded and my feet touched the ground. Correcting my coat, I started to leave the place, "This would be the last time I'd be looking away from something between you and me. Do this again and it won't just be your magical flames to extinguish, I might quell your life's flickering flame," his eyes widened, "after all, it's not unnatural to die suddenly at your age."

(3rd person POV)

Arisu's slim figure hovered above the Alacryans' actively marching army of mana beasts and humans alike like a grim reaper, her eyes glinting with bloodlust. The palpable dread leaked out of her like a fluid mist in the winters; slowly, horrifyingly creeping up as it sent shivers down the Alacryans' spine. Some of the few, weaker corrupted mana beasts almost got out of control before getting under control due to some chant by their Alacryan controllers.

"Hmm, they have strikers, shields, sentries, casters and instillers. Instillers and Sentries are pretty much a useless choice in this battle that involves mana beasts as their main line of attack. Strikers would be more focused in the forest." Arisu mused while tapping her chin with her index finger, "so a bunch of casters and shields. Interesting."

She raised her arm up, her hand wide open. A huge ball made of pure flames manifested in the epicentre of her hand as she smirked and looked down, "Block this for me, would you." With a sneer she launched the gigantic fireball into the air.

'Utility of spells is crucial. A person with low mana levels can easily beat someone with higher levels of mana. In the end it all depends on the utility and individual creativity of the caster.'

A distant memory popped into Arisu's mind as she remembered Arthur standing alongside her and throwing a stone into the river. The stone touched the water's surface multiple times and reached the other side without sinking. 'See? You know I did something with mana but you can't pinpoint it. This is the unique utility of every spell.'

Arisu smiled bitterly, clutching the left side of her chest as she raised her hand in the air once again. "Give me a break, will you. Don't tell me you anticipated this." She spoke with a quavering voice. As she said that the ball of flames increased in size and then like fireworks exploded in midair.

"Well, if not fireball. How about this then?"

[PyroStorm Rupture]

The fragments of flames started to rain down on the beasts and Alacryans' alike like hell fire. Several shields compounded upon one another.

"As expected." Arisu spoke to herself as she added wind mana to it. The hundreds of fire balls swelled in size and intensity before exploding like a systematic series of timed mines, making the shields crumble one after another. Layer by layer, the shields fragmented to dust. Left utterly defenceless, the following hundred other fireballs, augmented to their maximum potential by wind magic, landed on the ground and started to explode.

The high temperatures caused their skins to melt and the close proximity caused the lush green trees with fruits to be replaced in a gruesome tapestry of blood and chunks of flesh everywhere. A huge crater formed beneath the first wave of beasts, foot soldiers and riders alike and then turned into a hellhole where more and more mindless beasts along with their riders continued to fall into it while flames continued to rain inside the hole, making it seem like a scene straight from hell.

The following battalion stopped and watched in fear as a single figure hovered above them while the remaining Dicathians started to march forward—high spirits but a bit fearful of their own ally.

"Well, well, maybe I should visit the forest as well?" Arisu mused as she looked at the army of mutated beasts. "Well, after this." She said with a sneer.

TEASER FOR NEXT CHAPTER

*agh* So mana doesn't work on these things. That's an issue.

What else have I been barking for the last few minutes?

Regis, use aether.

Nope. Nah. Nada. I don't want my pathetic previous form. No way in White Room I am doing that.

(A/n) Hello everyone. As I said before, I would be releasing a bit in depth and varying POV's now, making the chapters around 6k-7k words. And I had another discovery.

I can't abide by a schedule. My fingers itch to to publish but I will try to abide by it the update after this one. I update Masterpiece on Saturday anyways and it's saturday now. Well it just turned saturday. Anyways, here is the second last Arisu art I have.

If any of you useless wankers have stable diffusion, lemme know. I want you to make some art using some "loras" I have that will help generate the same model in different poses.

P.S; It's not the urdu word lora. mfs.