Fourteen

It was two days and I refused to see Skye. Although he came to pick me up that day I left his home but I didn't allow it. He even called and texted my phone but I didn't want to pick it up. I wasn't ignoring, I just needed a little time.

For Those two days, I stayed with Sam in our apartment. He was actually shocked after I had told him what really transpired between Skye and I and why I was here in our apartment. I needed answers.

" Why are you thinking about it that much?. It's not bad" Sam was always his Sassy self.

" But, I am not…" I stammered

" Gay?. Who cares." He hissed. " I actually suspected this. I mean.You guys were so close."

I also made time for Juliet like I had never before. I felt guilty being with her because she was nice and I was just a selfish asshole. She was enough but was it a crime if I felt a missing void?. Sometimes when I'm with her or generally for these two days, a feeling of emptiness and a choking feeling overwhelms me.

" Let's have sex" Juliet brought it up on the second day. We were in her room.

We were both sitting on the bed and I held her face. " Are you sure we are ready for this?"

" I have been ready waiting for you to initiate it but you didn't"

I apologized and drew her close to me. Maybe this was a chance to prove that I love women I thought to myself.

She kissed softly and passionately. She was beautiful and gentle. She took my hand and slid to her as she was moaning and kissing me. Her breasts were soft and her nipples were hard. Flashes of Skye sucking on my breasts intruded on my mind. I also did my best to forget but it keeps running in my mind.

I had to stop not only because of my invading memory of my night with Skye but because I wasn't feeling a spark, l was mentally drained. Maybe I will try again next time.

" Why did you stop?" Juliet didn't Let it go.

" Am sorry. Let's do it next time. I have a lot on my mind, I can't concentrate"

I felt so bad that I was hurting her

" What is this about?. Do you have someone alone that you are fucking?"

"No," I said quickly. " There's no one. Am having some hard time that isn't allowing me think straight"

" Okay?. I want to know about it"

" I don't think you need to know"

" Of course I need to know. I am your girlfriend" she threatened.

" My Mom is sick and she's in the hospital" I had to think of what to say.

Her anger disappeared and she looked really worried for me. " I'm so sorry. I was being unreasonable"

" No offense taken."

" I really hope she gets better".

Juliet doesn't deserve all these lies that I was bold enough to tell her. She would never forgive me when she gets to find out the truth about all the lies I ever said to her. She deserves more and that's obviously not me. I still wonder why she was still there.