1 Chapter One

August 3rd, 9:56 am

I was at home, the summer before my senior year. I wasn't sure whether to be excited or nervous, but I was pretty sure it was both. My best friend, Tayler, should be here soon. 10 am, everyday, unless one of us said otherwise. I hadn't seen him for a week, though, he was on holiday with his mom. The front door swung open and I ran to greet him. As he stepped into the house, I practically tackled him with my massive bear hug. He picked me up by my waist and my arms wrapped around his neck. 

"Hey, Rob!" He laughed into my shoulder as I clung to him like a koala bear.

"Why did you have to go for so long? I missed you!" 

He placed me down and we walked through to the kitchen where my mom was sitting. 

"I was only gone a week, Robin." 

"Still!" I spoke through my massive smile, I was so glad to finally see him. 

Me, Tay and my mom all sat round the dining table laughing as Tay told us stories about what his mom was like on holiday. She'd always been funny and like family to me. Growing up, she was basically like a second mom to me. She was always here with Tayler or I was at their house and she treats me like one of her own. I guess it's because she's always wanted a daughter but ended up only having Tayler. I laughed at Tayler's story before noticing he looked a little sad. 

"Just gonna go to the bathroom." He spoke suddenly and got up and left. 

My mom looked at me confused but I just shrugged, I didn't know what was wrong with him but I knew there was something. A few minutes later he came back downstairs seeming stressed and told us he had to go. He left and my mom and I were left sitting there confused. 

I got up and followed him out of the house.

"Tayler! What's wrong?" I yelled after him. 

"Go inside, Rob. It's cold." There was a bit of a chill but I was fine. 

"Don't worry, I'm fine. What's up? Why did you leave so suddenly?" 

"Just leave it, Robin." He spoke harshly and I was taken aback. 

He finally turned around to look at me and I could tell he'd been crying but I still had no idea why. We were all happy, talking about his holiday so I couldn't think of why he'd be this upset. 

"I can't do this anymore, Robin. I need some space."

"Can't do what? I don't understand." I was confused, I didn't know what he meant. 

"Just- Just leave me alone, Robin. I'm done."

He turned around and walked away and I was left there stunned. Somehow, it felt like a break up, but much worse. 

September 2nd, 7:02 am

I finally decided to roll on out of bed and get ready for school. My alarm had woken me up at 6:30 but I stayed in bed, just staring at the ceiling and thinking. I hadn't seen Tayler in nearly a month and I was broken. Since that day, I've spent most of my time in my room. I've barely eaten, barely slept and I'm ninety-nine percent sure that I look like death warmed over. I dragged myself into the bathroom to wash my face and stuff and I winced as I caught sight of myself in the mirror. I looked like I hadn't slept in a thousand years and my hair was like a bird's nest on the back of my head. It took me a while but I finally managed to make myself look semi-presentable. I grabbed my bag and car keys and left the house. 

The morning was uneventful, I barely spoke to anyone, couldn't focus in classes and as it got to lunchtime I sat alone and didn't eat. My depression rut hasn't been great for my self confidence at all, my skin's terrible and I've lost way more weight than I'd like to admit. I never had to worry about how I looked when Tay and I were friends, he'd seen me at my best and my worst and boosted my confidence throughout all of it. He was the best friend anyone could have and it hurts so much that I don't have him anymore. I basically have no one now. After grabbing a bottle of water, I made my way to my locker to get stuff for my next lesson. Just as I unlocked and opened the door, I felt someone shove me into it and my head slammed into the edge of the door and my books fell to the floor. I winced and reached my hand up to my forehead where I hit it. There was definitely blood but I couldn't register that before I heard someone else slam against the lockers behind me. I turned around, quicker than I probably should have, to see Tayler holding the captain of the football team by his collar. Guy was his name. Tay was taller but slim, Guy certainly had the lead in strength but that didn't seem to matter. 

"What the hell did you do that to her for, Stone?" Tayler snapped, getting right up into Guy's face. 

Guy chuckled as he spoke, just angering Tayler more, "The bitch was in my way."

Before I realised what was happening or what he said, Tay's fist slammed right into Guy's face. He groaned and Tayler didn't even give him a chance to breathe before he punched him again. I didn't know what to do, this was because of me but there was no way I could stop it. A few more seconds passed and Tayler's fist rose again but I didn't let it happen this time. I walked over and put my hand on his arm, mustering up the courage to speak to him. His arm felt tense and hot under my hand. 

"Tay. Please," was all I could croak out, I was suddenly struggling to speak because of my nerves.

His arm lowered and he turned around to look at the floor in front of me, not even glancing at my face. I looked down at his hand and his knuckles were red and looked painful. Without thinking, I slightly brushed my fingers against the back of his hand and he took a deep breath in and finally lifted his head to look at me. I was about to speak again but the principal's voice boomed from a few meters down the corridor. Our eye contact broke and Tay turned to look at the principal. 

"All three of you, my office. Now." His voice was harsh. 

We walked to his office and he asked me to sit outside while he spoke to Tayler and Guy. I sat on the chair outside of the office and just waited.