64 Chapter 60

If I had to describe the experience I would use two words, exciting and disgusting, due to my enchanted perception I felt everything, every breath, thrust, and orgasm, every single cell of my body felt the same amount of pleasure and the same amount of disgust, because let me be honest, sex is disgusting, the act, the motions, and the end, every part of it was disgusting, that was the good of it, somehow.

I was staring at Felicia, sleeping on my bare chest after our 5-hour long session, I could have done longer but if I did she would have died, I even had to shrink my dick in some moment to not kill her.

I also had become infertile to not get her pregnant, not a pleasant experience if I can't tell you, my sperm had so much vitality that I could make even an infertile woman pregnant.

I don't know how I should feel, happy? Disgusted? Annoyed? It was at these moments that I hated Gamer's mind, it stopped me from being normal, from feeling what a normal human should feel, and constantly being calm in moments like these was exhausting somehow.

I slowly continued petting her head, as if she was an animal, something so weak that I had to take care of, seeing someone like this is wrong on so many levels, but I can't force myself to think otherwise, she is... so weak, so unconscious of her surroundings, so ignorant of everything.

* And what is wrong with that?* Bastet asked after returning from its stroll.

' Everything is wrong with that, the mere thought of being unprepared makes me want to vomit.'

* That's because you see weakness as an illness, but you have to understand that not everyone is as lucky as you were.*

' Lucky? I went through hell to become what I am today.'

* Usually people don't return from hell, they stay there, constantly in pain and wishing for death every single second, you suffered, stating otherwise would be a lie, but unlike others, you were lucky enough to gain a power that made you able to break free from the shackles you had while you were in hell.*

I... I never saw it like that, I always placed myself in front of others, never caring about other people's lives, but compared to me, hadn't they also suffered?

Using Control to not Wake up Felicia I blink on the top of a nearby skyscraper just wearing my pants, I needed space to think.

* I am not saying you have to constantly put others in front of you, but you are not the only one who suffered your girl, became Black Cat because she was raped, and your chicken bodyguard would have become a planet-ending being who would have dyed in few years had she not discovered her powers before it was too late, don't let me even start about the kid with the spider symbol.*

'Peter? His uncle died, and?'

* His parents died, his uncle died, his aunt was almost killed several times, and he nearly died more than anyone on the face of the earth, but he still stands, his hope of the world never wavering, never dying, and constantly being a ray of hope for those who believe in him.*

I didn't say anything to that, I knew he was right, but my entire being refused to accept it, I had grown so used to being an asshole that I am not sure if I could stop being one.

* You don't need to save the world or anyone, but remember that not everyone will leave you to die in case you need help.*

At those words I finally started moving once again, returning to Felicia's room and getting back inside the bed, her warmth feeling comforting against my constantly cold body.

And I did something I stopped doing from the moment my End had reached the 500, I slept.

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I opened my eyes, exactly six hours later, at exactly 6 AM, I received the healing notification I hadn't seen in quite a while and felt better than usual.

My mind felt sharper, had the effect of not sleeping built up enough to the point where it affected me?

* Nope, you just had so much load to realise that it even slowed down your thoughts.*

I rolled my eyes and got up from the bed, Felicia still sleeping in the weirdest position I had ever seen a woman sleeping in.

Walking towards her kitchen I looked inside the fridge and started making breakfast.

Only to stop, why am I doing this? I don't need to eat.

*She does.*

' Right, she needs to eat, and to sleep, and to do everything else a human needs to work properly.'

* That's not the point, she eats those sweat things because she likes the taste, and she takes naps because she likes the sensation it gives her when she wakes up, she does things not because she expects something in return, but because she feels happy when she does, them, when was last time you did something that would have given you nothing in return?*

'Never?'

*Exactly, now cook her breakfast and see how you will feel and she thanks you.*

Strangely, unlike usual, no quest appeared for making good food.

I was doing something and would gain nothing in return.

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A.N. Sorry for the short chapter but this is more of a character growth chapter than an actual growth in power one, so yeah, MC won't be as much of an asshole anymore, at least not to everyone, for once Jean won't get killed when she tries to help.