3 Breakup on the Beach

It was another excruciating graveyard shift for Detective Clive Rand. Yawning as he sat back in his outdated police cruiser, he eyed the dashboard clock while popping open a flask to take a swig of his favorite green apple liqueur. 3:49 AM. Smacking his lips at the tart taste, the 53-year-old police veteran gave his stubbly reflection in the side mirror a passing glance. His greying, yet thick wavy hair matched the grizzled grey hair that formed a thin goatee around his mouth, and his sunken, hazel eyes reflected years of experience in the Graveport police department. 

Once an energetic rookie, the disgruntled cop was a shell of his former self. Spending his nights searching for missing persons, often cold cases specifically, the detective owed his slow days to the superheroes that now fought crime on behalf of law enforcement. While many police officers celebrated these heroes, Clive was especially distrusting of vigilantism. He was wary of them, and only cooperated with superheroes if it involved his job.

Fighting alcoholism after the death of his wife, the detective continued his drinking on the job while parked along a polluted, litter-ridden beach behind the grey-brown waters of the Atlantic Ocean. The defunct "Port-World" amusement park nearby, Clive reminisced over childhood spent there. Graveport used to be such a vibrant city full of life, but like himself, the years hadn't been kind, and the industrial city looked as though it was falling apart. 

Downing the last sip of sour liqueur, the detective looked up to spot something floating in the water towards the beach. It resembled a small boat, and as it got closer, Clive could make out someone clinging to the top of it. As it neared, he realized that it was chunks of log of varying sizes crudely stitched together by grass or twine, where it was on the verge of falling apart. Landing on the beach against the waves, a young man with brown hair stumbled off and exhaustively began to drag himself up the sand. It was a cool November night, and his wet boxers shorts and T-shirt clung to his body.

"What the hell?" Clive muttered to himself as he clasped the door handle, preparing to walk up to the man and see if he was alright.

Just then, a blur rocketed towards the sand and impacted the beach hard. The ground shaking slightly, a figure stood up from her squatted posture a few feet behind the man, her long blonde hair blowing in the dim light as her eyes began to grow a bright blue. Sighing as he let go of the car door, Clive remarked to himself that a superhero had beaten him to the job yet again.

"VINCENT!!" Power Princess yelled in a loud, booming voice, frightening the young man and causing him to fall onto his back.

"J-Jan!" he stammered as he fell against the sand in fear. "I-I can explain!"

"You were trying to run away!" the superheroine growled, her muscular, voluptuous figure looming over the man like some kind of monster. "Oh my gosh…you were trying to return to your family! To that WHORE who doesn't deserve you!!"

Clasping her gloved hands over her mouth, the super-powered woman trembled in anger.

"Heheh…lover's quarrel?" Clive chuckled as she shook his head. "Who knows what weird sex games these supers do."

What happened next, however, made the detective realize that something was horribly wrong with the situation. Looking as though her costume had been hastily thrown on, the trembling Passion Princess reared her leg back and kicked the groveling man in the side. Following a loud, crackling sound, the young man went flying, landing several hundred feet away in a heap. Leaning forward, Clive watched as the man yelled in pain, before spitting out what looked like dark blood.

"D-damn you!! I LOVE you so much, and you do this to me!?" the trembling heroine shrieked as she flew over to where her victim had landed in the blink of an eye, before reaching down and hauling his wincing body into the air by his shirt. "What's wrong with me, huh?! Why are you trying to get back to that bitch!? Am I not attractive to you? My fans say that I have the best body, and that my ass is perfect! Is this not a perfect ASS!?"

"Y-yes! Please, I love—

The whimpering man was cut off as Passion Princess grabbed his head by his hair and repeatedly began to slam his face against her large, rotund bubble butt over and over again. Jiggling each time the man's face impacted it, the hero lifted his head up again to reveal that his nose was now bleeding profusely. 

"What the frig…" Clive muttered to himself, unable to believe what he was witnessing. He'd distrusted superheroes for a now while for a number of reasons, but what he was seeing being done by the world's most powerful hero was blatant physical abuse. Reaching for his car door again, the cop wanted to intervene…but his instincts screamed at him to remain hidden in his darkened vehicle.

"J-Jan, Power Princess," the young man whimpered as he was dropped to the wet sand below, where he immediately bowed and began to reach for her boots. "I love you and only you, please believe me! Okay, I screwed up, but this is what happens in relationships, right? Fights happen. Come, please let's just go home."

Her fist clenched, the heroine held her arm above the pleading, trembling man as he began to desperately kiss at her feet, seemingly uncaring of all the mud and sand that now lined the bottoms. This seemed to calm her down somewhat, where she crouched down so that she was at eye level with him again.

"I'd like that…but you literally built a homemade raft to escape my island," Power Princess said calmly as she put a hand to his shoulder. "If you go back with me, know that I'm going to amputate your limbs so that you can never, ever escape me again."

"W-what?!" he stammered 

"It won't be so bad, I'll just freeze them off, and you won't feel a thing," the heroine said as her excitement began to build while her smile twisted into a rather disturbing grin. "You'll be like my teddy bear, I'll cuddle you all day, and we can have lots of beautiful babies, and we never need to be apart for even a second! Pledge yourself as my forever-boyfriend, and I'll forgive you and we can go home!"

"Jesus, Mary, and Joseph," Clive hissed under his breath as he reached for his radio. "Attention all available units, this is Rand. We have a code 136 in progress. Anyone nearby, get your ass over to the Port-World beach now!"

"N-NO! I won't do that!" the fearful man cried. "Please, Jan, that's going too far, have a heart. You're supposed to be a hero, what is this shit? This is what villains do! I'm begging you, just let me go, find another boyfriend. This isn't right, I can't let myself be turned into some kind of gimp for—

"If you don't agree to my terms, then we're through!" Passion Princess yelled as tears seemed to well up in her eyes. "D-dammit, I actually friggin loved you, you know!"

With that, she reached down and grabbed the young man by the shirt before hauling him into the air with her. Squirming and kicking in panic, he looked down over the ocean as his assailant hovered them over the water some ways. Clive continued watching, now unable to hear anything they were saying over the crashing waves. In the dim moonlight, he watched in horror as in one swift movement, Passion Princess tore the poor man in half.