the potential

At first, everything was black, then red, then purple then white.

The colors changed and changed without anything noticeable in sight.

I just stood there, unable to move even a muscle.

"integration complete, starting the foundation trial."

The same robotic voice as before talked in my head, making my heart skip a beat.

As soon as it finished talking, the changing colors in front of me stopped in black and the voice talked again.

"Difficulty has been set to black."

"Good luck."

After the voice disappeared, I felt like I could move my body again but as soon as tried to take a step I felt my body fly upward like had just jumped into the heavens.

It was a strange feeling; I could feel my body going up but after a few seconds it stopped but I didn't feel like I was falling.

I just stood there, afraid to even move my feet.

After a few minutes of nothing happening, I took another step, this time with less power, but again, as soon as I put my feet back on the ground, I felt my body flying upward.

'it kinda feels good," I thought and took another step as soon as my body stopped, this time with all the force I could muster.

"woooohooooo," I shouted as I felt my body flying at incredible speed.

I repeated the prosses a few times and was getting used to the feeling when suddenly the blackness around me disappeared and everything became light blue.

I still felt like I was flying but this time was different.

Instead of flying upward, I was… "Aaaaaaah, I'm falllliiiingggggg,"

I screamed so much that my throat started to hurt.

As I was falling, I saw the ground getting closer and closer and started to panic, I put my hands in front of my face and was getting ready for the impact but even after more than twenty seconds, nothing happened.

When I opened my eyes, I saw the ground about a few centimeters away from me.

"am I…. floating?" I asked myself but as soon as I talked out loud, the force that was holding me afloat vanished and I fell headfirst to the ground.

"augh," I stood up and started dusting my cloth….

"what?? why am I naked???"

I felt like a nightmare…

When I looked down, there was nothing…. There.

It was like I was genderless.

I was naked, but I couldn't see…. Well….. anything.

"Now it makes sense, I'm dreaming," I mumbled while looking around to see if I could find anything to do until I woke up.

It was very rare to feel conscious during sleep, so I didn't try to wake myself up by force.

I walked for a few minutes, finding nothing but a green field in all directions.

"What a boring dream….."

As if waiting for my big mouth to open, I saw a small black dot on the horizon, getting closer and closer at a fast speed.

"What is that?" I squinted my eyes, trying to see the object a little better.

As soon as I saw the thing, I started panicking and pinching myself to wake up but nothing seemed to help, "this is not how dreams are supposed to work. I should wake up when I pinch myself."

Then in the midst of pinching and slapping, I noticed something. "Why can I feel pain?? SHIT, this isn't a dream…" I screamed and started running in the opposite direction, trying to put as much distance as possible between myself and the monstrosity that was headed toward me.

But no matter which direction I turned, the "thing" was always in front of me.

It was like the ground was turning under my feet, preventing me from changing directions.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck….. what do I do now?"

I looked around seeing nothing but the damn green field so I closed my eyes waiting for a miracle to happen but the agitation I felt made me open my eyes and when I opened them, I still could see the monster getting closer and closer.

It was like a dinosaur with wings. Not a dragon for sure, but something like that.

It was more like a Terex with wings but without feet or hands. And it was flying at incredible speed towards me.

When the monster was clearly in sight, and I thought I was done for, another dot appeared on the horizon.

This one jumped up for a few seconds before diving back into the ground like it was water, and then repeated the process over and over again, getting close to the Terex at a fast speed.

When it got to the Terex, the dinosaur-like fish monster opened its mouth and swallowed it whole.

Then it started swimming towards me without even stopping for a second.

But before it got closer, another, bigger monster appeared just like before, eating this one, then another, and another, and another.

"If you don't stop this cycle, it will only get harder for you to kill one of them you know?" A voice sounded from beside me but when I looked around I found nobody.

"They will only get bigger and stronger until you make it stop," the voice said again.

"How am I supposed to kill those things? I'm just a kid." I asked but the voice didn't answer for a few seconds.

"You just have to want it hard enough..." It said.

"Want what?" I asked back.

"Power, you just have to want it and you shall have it."

After saying that, the voice disappeared and no matter what I said or did, it didn't answer me again. 

On the other hand, the monsters in front of me got bigger and bigger and it looked like I became smaller and smaller at the same time.

'How am I supposed to kill those things?' I asked myself and then convinced myself to take a step forward.

As soon as I took a step forward, I felt an overwhelming fear take over my body, making me take a step back again.

"What was that???" I said while panting.

I retook a few seconds, looking at the appearing and disappearing monsters in front of me, and then without thinking, I started running towards them.

I hadn't even taken three steps when my body froze from the fear that intensified with every step.

"I

Just

Have

To

Want

It."

I repeated and took another step, and another, and another…

And soon, the fear was replaced by anger.

So much anger that I didn't know what to do with them, so I just imagined Jack's face in front of me and ran with more speed.

As I ran, the monsters got bigger and bigger, making me doubt myself but then Jack's ugly face appeared in front of me again and the anger replaced the doubt.

As I ran towards the monster and got closer to it, I felt something within me changing. It was like a broken piece of glass was transforming into an unbreakable diamond.

I could feel my body, my thoughts, and even my personality changing.

I felt… invisible.

My body started to grow with every step I took and when I finally reached the monster, it was like a bug in my eyes.

I felt like I was at the top of the world, looking down on all my problems that previously seemed invincible in my eyes.

I lifted my left foot and squished those problems with such ease that it made me wonder…. 'Why haven't I tried to get rid of them before?'

As I asked myself that question, the voice came back, "You have done good son."

Just as I turned to see the owner of the voice, I opened my eyes and saw pure white space all around me.

There was no trace of the voice left.

No trace of the fear, anger…. And no trace of the courage left.

I was back to being myself.

A skinny little scared boy who didn't know how to face his fears and problems.

But there was something different. Something was inside me that wasn't there before.

I just had to want it.

But did I want it?

What if I ruined it like everything I touched in my life?

What if I didn't deserve it?

What if I….

"Fuck this life, I want it and I will have it," I said out loud and reached my mind toward the dormant piece inside me.

As soon as I looked at it, I saw a tiny white glowing diamond floating inside a black space.

It felt like there was a very small piece of me that wasn't mine.

It felt strange. It felt good and bad at the same time.

It felt…. Dormant.

It was like I had to want it and it would be mine.

It was mine to grab and it was mine to command.

It was all the things I lacked and all the things I had.

It was just dormant.

It was waiting for me to wake it up.

It was potential.