1 Prologue

My favorite place in the entire world is the garden. Of ever blooming flowers, of the ever green plants, of the ever beautiful serenity.

I carried my book of botany with me and though I am still small, I still follow my sensei, Mr. Ferns as he lovingly inspects a dark red carnation.

"Do you know the symbolism of this flower, kid?"

I looked intently at the beautiful flower. Its petals soft and delicate that curved slightly outward and its beautiful stem so green and shiny. Bathed in light sunlight they seemed so ethereal.

"No, sir..." I asked and looked expectantly at his old weathered face. "What does it symbolise?"

He smirked and held one. "Kid, you give this thing to the person you love."

"Oh?" I titled my head. "Why?"

He placed his hand on my head and quickly messed up my hair.

"It symbolises love and affection. A worthy flower to give the person you love. "

As I made my way back to the small room where I live, holding a single dark red carnation I saw a small child looking at me from the big house. He sat on the stone steps and had his chubby arms crossed.

"Hey you! " he shouted.

The boy looked at me so I stopped. "What?"

"What's that in you hand?" he pointed at the carnation.

"Oh, this is a red carnation,"I told him excited to share a gained knowledge." It symbolises love and affection."

The boy nodded as if considering my explanation.

He walked to my slowly and looked at me seriously." Kid, give me one of that, " he demanded as if a boss even though he was but a small child.

.

For me, life has been nothing but cruel. An endless roll of film that I vividly resonate with at first but numbly now as time passes.

For me, love is a luxury that I'm not sure I want because everytime I try I always end up burning and being reduced into ashes. For me, love is falling in a deep abyss with no way out.

Why?

Maybe because it's me, maybe it's my fate to be weary of life as time goes by. Maybe because its my destiny, to experience life in its truest reality without anyone to fall back on.

Maybe that's why I silently stare at the wilted leaves falling and then find them similar to me.

Maybe... Maybe... Maybe...

A brown leaf swirls towards my palm and I silently stare at it.

I am Salem Tiberious Carson, a man that has weathered and survived a life so heavy with cruelties, and this is my story.