Stay a little longer

I'm Tadashi Yamaguchi, this is my first year in high school. --------

I'm very thrilled to meet new people this year. Ever since I transferred to Karasuno Highschool, I've been feeling very confident about myself. No one here knew about my past and know one will know that I'm a transgender male. I used to be a girl, but I felt like I was trapped inside a body that wasn't mine. I felt like I could never accept myself as being a female. It never sat right with me. I would never be satisfied with my own body.

I used to have a friend, in the second year of middle school. He told me something about "Gender transitioning". At the time, I never knew that you could change gender identities. I told my mom what my friend told me, she didn't accept me. She yelled at me and told me it was just a phase and not to listen to the bullshit other people put into your heads. She grounded me from all social contact with friends. Whenever I walked to school, I used to get bullied by others. They used to tell me---- "You can't be a boy, you were born a girl." - "You're psychotic, God will never accept you. Go to hell." I used to get abused mentally, and physically. No one would stand by me, besides that one friend. Then, out of nowhere, he moved. He never told me goodbye. That was it. He was the only person I had, who I could have a connection with. Without him, I was nothing. I could never be who I wanted to be. I was worthless, a waste of space. I'm scared. All I ever wanted was to feel love and to be accepted. I'm ashamed of humanity. They can't accept people for who they want to be. It truly hurts. "please, please, please,,," I pray "Can this school be accepting to me? All I want is to live a normal life as a boy. Just please, let this be the place where I can feel happiness." After that, I'd lay on my bed, staring out my window at the glowing, night sky. Then, I'd slowly drift off to sleep.

----Present time----

As I made my way to the gym, I see a couple of first years chasing after each other. One of them has bright orange, fluffy hair. He's a very scrawny and short kid. The other one is tall, and he has black, straight hair. He also has a very scary face. I make my way into the gym, and see all the people on the team talking and laughing. I set my bag down, and made my way towards the group. The orange haired kid jumped really high, and screamed; "KAGEYAMA-KUN, LOOK THERES A NEWCOMER." I really didn't want the attention drawn towards me. I gave a little smile and waved. This very pretty guy with silver hair, and a mole by his eye greeted me. "You must be Tadashi Yamaguchi. Welcome to the volleyball club, I'm Koushi Sugawara." He gave a smile. As Sugawara traced his finger to the other people on the court he stated "That's Daichi, our captain." then brought his finger over to the orange and black haired kids. "That is Kageyama, and Hinata." He brought his finger over to a very tall man, with a beard and a manbun. "That's Asahi. Then there's Kinoshita, Ennoshita, and Narita. That's Nishinoya, and Tanaka." Sugawara then brought his finger to a very gorgeous man. He had a tall, slender body. He wore glasses, and he had a tint of gold in his hair. I slightly blushed a crimson red. "That's Tsukishima." My heart dropped. He was the most flattering man I have ever seen. Tsukishima made eye contact with me for a second, then looked away. He turned back to the spot that he was at before, and started practicing his blocking. The small boy with orange hair moved across the court, while the black haired boy set the ball perfectly to his hand. Hinata closed his eyes and spiked the ball. Tsukishima blocked the ball, as he got used to Hinatas spikes. The time at practice passed by quickly. As we were cleaning up the gym, the boy with messy, blonde hair approached me. "You're Yamaguchi, right?" My face was flushed. I couldn't think. My mind went blank. I then realized the question that he had asked, and responded very quietly. "Y-yeah. You're Tsukishima, right?" Of course I had to stutter. It's not he would like me, after all, I was transgender. He probably wouldn't accept me. The only person that knew was the coach. He has to know this information in order for me to play. My train of thoughts were interrupted when I heard him speak up. "I don't really have any friends here. You don't seem like a bratty person to be around. Do you want to be friends?" I looked into his golden colored eyes and then blushed a light pink shade. "Oh, yeah, sure." He asked me "Do you have a phone number?" "Uh, yeah, I do." "Here, give me your phone." I gave him my phone. Tsukishima started typing his number in my phone. Watching his long fingers tap the screen gently was arousing... "Here" He returned my phone back to me. "T-thank you.." Tsukishima grabbed his things, and said "See you around." Everyone else went to go get some meat buns at a place near by. I started walking home when I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. I turned it on, to see a message.

T: Hey, what's up?"

Y: Oh! Hello, Tsukishima! Nothing much. I'm on my way home from practice.

T: Oh, that's nice. You didn't get meat buns with the others?

Y: Oh, no I didn't, haha. It seems like you didn't go get any either.

T: Yeah, my mom needed me home early to help her cook dinner. Well, I have to go help clean the kitchen. Talk to you later, Yams. Get home safe.

Y: Okay! Thank you, bye,,,

I turned off my phone, and started blushing. Y-yams? The more I started thinking about how he had given me a nickname, the more I blushed.

Once I arrived at my house, I unlocked the door to see my mother with a man I wasn't familiar with. I just rushed up stairs, with burning hot tears streaming down my face. This happens every night. I always come home to my mom being drunk, or with another man. I opened my door and locked it. I fell onto my bed, and stared at the ceiling. I slowly drifted off to sleep.

When I woke up, there was a knock on the door. I hurried downstairs, and opened the door. Tsukishima was standing before me. My eyes widened. I hadn't put on my binder on yet, and I was only wearing a tank top. Tsukishima looked at me, and greeted me a good morning. I said good morning back. I then asked; "How did you even find my house anyways?" He responded; "Oh, I looked up your last name and found it on google maps. How come you aren't ready for school, it starts in 20 minutes." "Oh, I kind of just woke up. If you need anything, there's pancakes on the counter, and orange juice in the fridge." I hurried upstairs to my room, then realized my binder wasn't on. My eyes widened. Did he notice? Would he hate me and say transphobic slurs to me? Ah, no time to be thinking, I have to get ready for school before he gets suspicious. I made my way back to the downstairs and Tsukishima asked "Hey Yams, what took you so long?" He stared at me as he started chuckling. I could feel my face heat up, as I heard him say my nickname. "Sorry about that Tsukki." I realized what I had said, and instantly apologized to him. "I'm very sorry. It just slippe-" "Hey, no worries." I looked up at him, and he had a slight blush across his face. "I gave you a nickname too, so it's not a problem. We are friends, right?" My heart shattered when I heard those words. I kept replaying what he said back and forth in my head. My eyes started to water, then I realized what had happened. I tried to shake it off. "Yeah, we're friends!" I gave a fake smile. Tsukishima told me to hurry up, and we started walking to school. How could I be so selfish? Of course he doesn't have feelings for me. Get realistic, we just met. You're being too clingy that's why. Apparently, Tsukishima noticed that I had a lot on my mind. "Hey Yams, are you okay. You seem to be out of it." I gave him another fake smile and said that I was fine. We made it to school, and we didn't have any classes together. This fact made me sad. "Bye, Tsukki!" Tsukishima ignored me, and made his way to his class. This made my heart ache a little. Well, it's to be expected, given his personality. Once it was lunch time, I found Tsukishima sitting on the roof top with his lunch bag. He only had a couple of things in there. Chips, and a sandwich. I had forgotten to pack a lunch since I woke up late, plus Tsukishima came over this morning. "Do you have a lunch?" This took me by surprise. Honestly, I didn't think he would notice. "U-uh no, I don't. I forgot to pack one this morning haha." He handed me his sandwich. "Hey are you sure you don't want it? I mean you barley have anything to eat." "Yeah, its fine. I don't don't eat much anyways." "T-thanks."

---

Months has passed since that day. My feelings only grew stronger for Kei. The one thing he didn't know about me is that I was transgender. I hid it pretty well. We had a bunch of sleepovers, and I figured out that his favorite food was strawberry cake. I really want to tell him how I feel, but he's the closest person that I have. I don't want to ruin things.

-------

T: Hey Yams, Wanna go to the mall with me today?

Y: Sure! What time?

T: I'll come pick you up around 5 pm. Sound good?

Y: Yeah, no problem. See you then :)

T: See you

I was very excited, even though we hung out everyday. I hurried up and got dressed. As I was getting dressed, I saw my door knob turn. It was my mom. She was as drunk as ever. In between slurs, she told me this; "You're a worthless piece of shit. You're not a boy, so stop thinking like that. You do nothing to help the family out. Maybe I should get rid of you. Stop acting like a lunatic ." She threw a beer can at me. It hit my head pretty hard. Blood starting getting into my eye. My mom left the room, and slammed the door shut. On her way out, I heard her stumble down the stairs mumbling about how useless I was. She went outside and slammed the door shut. At this time, it was 5 pm. I started sobbing. My eyes becoming red and puffy. Tear stains on my face. I didn't hear the sound of my phone go off, or the knocks on the door. I kept thinking over and over; She's right. You're a burden. Why not kill yourself. End it all. You can't do anything right. No one will ever love you. My thoughts got cut off when I saw my doorknob opening. I quickly covered my head and curled up in a ball. "YAMS! ARE YOU OKAY?" I looked up, just to see Tsukishima. He was dressed nice, and he had his hair done. "YAMS, ANSWER ME! PLEASE!" These words made me feel sad. I don't know why, but I started sobbing harder. I was crying so hard, that I started getting a headache. I felt a pair of arms wrap around me. The feeling I haven't felt in a long time. Tsukishima started running his slender fingers through my hair. He tried to calm me down and tell me that everything was going to be okay. I placed my head in the crook of his neck, and started sobbing even harder. I wrapped my arms around his stomach, and cried. We stayed like this for about 30 minutes. Tsukishima picked me up and placed me onto my bed. I covered my face with my hands. He was standing by my bed, and stared at me, feeling empathy. He looked so hurt to see me in his state. I spoke up and said "I'm so sorry Tsukki." He stared at me with wide eyes. "Yamaguchi, why are you even apologizing. If you don't tell me anything, I'll never know." I felt like I was going to cry again. "Tsukki.." My voice started cracking. "Cry Yamaguchi, its okay now. I'm here." He leaned in for another hug. My face heated up, and I hugged him back, with a tight grasp. I tried to tell him what happened in between sobs. We stopped embracing each other. Tsukishima sat beside me on my bed, and leaned up against the wall. "Yams.." He cupped his hand around my cheek. "Tell me everything that has happened." He wiped the blood off my forehead. While I was crying, I explained everything that has happened up to this point. He looked at me, in grief. I felt horrible. I was burdening him with all of my problems. "Tsukishima, I'm sor-" Tsukishima leaned in for a deep hug. "Please, stop apologizing Tadashi. It's not your fault." "But I'm bombarding yo-" Tsukishima leaned in for a kiss, and pecked my lips. My eyes widened. Tsukishima then broke the kiss, and gave me another hug. I started crying, instantly. I didn't hug him back I just sat there with my arms by my side. He hugged me tightly. I haven't felt this much love in a long time. I kept repeating "Tsukishima... Tsukishima...Tsukishima." In between sobs. "Shh, It's okay Yams. I won't leave your side, I promise." "Stay here Yams. I'm going to get a first-aid kit and bandage up your head." Tsukishima left the room. I got up from my bed, and looked in the mirror. There were tear stains on my face, eyebags, and my face was all red. As the memories flash back from Tsukishima kissing me, I got all flustered. Tsukishima opened the door, with a first-aid kit. "Yams,,," he patted a spot down by the bed. "Yams, come here. Let me fix you up." I sat next to Tsukishima, and stared into his eyes. They were very gorgeous. They had a gold color to them, and a shine. After Tsukishima bandaged up my head, he gave me a kiss on the forehead. "I'm sorry if I'm crossing my boundr-" I leaned in for a kiss. Tsukishima then responded to the kiss, and started kissing me back. I broke the kiss, and stared into his eyes. He looked at me with lust. I said; "Thank you, for everything, Tsukishima." He stared at me "You're welcome." He helped me off the bed, and chose out some clothes for me. It was now 6:30 pm. I put the clothes on that he had chosen out for me. "Are you ready to go, Yams?" "Yeah, yeah I'm coming!" I said as I washed the tear stains off my face.

---- Once we arrived at the mall, we walked to a store called 'Hot Topic'. I thought I had seen someone there that I knew. I was correct. Someone from my old middle school was there. His name is 'Miya Atsumu'. "Hey Tsukishima.." -- "Yeah?" "Can we go to a different store, please?" Tsukishima told me that he had to return something here, and that it wouldn't take too long. I tried not to get seen my Atsumu. I didn't want him to reveal that I was actually a girl. I heard a scream across the room, my heart dropped at the sound of it. "HEY, ISN'T THAT MIYOKO?!" Atsumu and his friends rushed over to me. I tried to hide behind Tsukishima. Tsukishima looked up at me, then back at Atsumu. "What the hell are you talking about? Who the hell is "Miyoko"?" Atsumu said in a sarcastic voice "Oh, you don't know yet? That 'boy' hiding behind you is actually a girl. Never thought you would transfer schools, just to hide your actual gender. How pathetic." My eyes started watering, and I ran out of the store. I was getting a bunch of stares directed towards me, but I didn't care. I just wanted to get out of there as soon as possible. I started sprinting as fast as I could on the sidewalk, then found a little store nearby and sat there for a bit, crying. 'I haven't cried this much in a long time' I laughed at myself, knowing how pathetic I was. I felt a vibration from my phone. I unlocked my phone and on my screen was a text from Tsukishima.

T: YAMS! YAMS, PLEASE TELL ME WHERE YOU ARE! I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU LIKE THIS. I love you the way you are. Girl or boy doesn't matter to me. Please come back to me.

Y: I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner... As I was typing this, tears fell onto my phone screen. I just don't want you to hate me. I know, it's disgusting. I never told you. I'm sorry,,, I'm at a nearby store not to far from here. The address is "xxx-xxx-xxx"

T: I'm on my way. We need to have a conversation when we get home, okay?

I just left him on read. I bet he was going to tell me that I was a disgusting freak, that didn't belong in this world. Another person who should die. The thought of this made me cry harder, and harder. I felt a presence upon me. I looked up to see Tsukishima with cuts and bruises on his face. He squatted down to where I was sitting. "Yams.." He grabbed my hands and helped me up. I started crying more. He hugged me. Once again, I put my head up to his chest and cried my eyes out. Tsukishima picked me up, bridal style and carried me home as I was crying. The whole walk, we didn't say a word. Once we reached his house, he took me upstairs and placed me onto his bed. He started kissing me, passionately. He got on top of me and broke the kiss. He layed on my stomach and whispered a bunch of sweet nothings into my ear. I love you, I love you, I love you. I tangled my hands into Tsukishima's hair, then sat up. He sat up with me, and we were now sitting across from each other. "Yams, I want you to know that I don't care about your gender identity. I love you. I love you a lot. These past few months make me happy that you're in my life. I don't ever want to see you hurt." That's the first time I heard so many 'I love yous'. I stared at him with disbelief. I started crying again, but not with sad tears this time. Happy ones. "P-please don't leave me." I cried in between sobs. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. Please stay here with me, Kei." He leaned in for a hug. I hugged him back, and gave him a kiss. He kissed me back, very passionately. After he broke the kiss, I stared at his bruised face. "I'm sorry." I said to him. "I'm so so so so sorry." He looked like he was in pain. I touched one of his bruises and he winced at the pain. "Tsukki, please come with me. I can clean out your cuts." Tsukishima stood up and followed me to the bathroom. As I was cleaning out his cuts, he lifted up my shirt. "I'm sorry,,," He said. I winced in pain as he touched the sides of my ribs. I was in pain. Since the binder that I had on didn't make my chest completely flat, I also used some wraps, in hopes that it would help. "Yams, please don't do this to yourself." I looked at him and broke down into tears. Tsukishima hugged me, once again. As Tsukishima took off the binder, along with the bandages, I winced in pain. Tsukishima stared at my body. He looked hurt. Once again, Tsukishima hugged me and I hugged back. "I can start saving up, to give you enough money for top surgery. I want you to feel comfortable in your own body." That was the best thing I have ever heard in my whole life. I felt a rush of joy and sadness. How could someone so kind come into my life, and help someone out like me. They even love me. These thoughts raced through my mind. After that, he gave me an over sized t-shirt and picked me up. He carried me to his bed and sat me up straight. Tsukishima lied down , and I layed down on his chest. He started playing with my hair, and it calmed me down. Slowly, we started drifting off to sleep.

The next morning, we have volleyball practice. I woke up with Tsukishima playing with my hair and telling me to wake up. I stared at him and blushed, thinking about the previous actions from last night. Tsukishima sat me up and kissed me passionately. "I love you, Yams. You're such a gorgeous person. I love you, I love you." After hearing him say those words, I responded back with another kiss. After I broke the kiss, I said "I love you, Kei." and smiled at him. "Hmm, is that so?" He said. I instantly blushed at the tone of his voice. Tsukishima helped me get dressed, and brought me downstairs. We ate some pancakes, then left for volleyball.

----

When we arrived to the gym, everyone had heard what happened. They knew that I was a girl. I was scared, and hid behind Tsukishima. They all ran up to me and gave me a heartfelt hug. A hug that made me feel accepted for once. Daichi and Sugawara were worried about me and asked me if I was okay. Everyone on the team asked if I needed anything. Tsukishima cut in "Hey guys, stop trying to steal my boyfriend." He said this as he grabbed my hand firmly. Everyone was in shock, and my face was flushed. Hinata said "Boy-BOYFRIEND?" Kageyama told Hinata to calm down, because those two were dating too. "Boke Hinata Boke, its nothing new. We're dating too." Kageyama pulled Hinata into a tight embrace. Hinata got all flustered and tried to escape from Kageyama, but Kageyama just kissed his forehead. I chuckled.. "Thank you all so much." They all gave me a knowing smile, and continued back to practice. Tsukishima told them that we were leaving early, as he didn't feel very good.

----

He carried me home, bridal style. Once we made it to Tsukishimas house, we started making out. He looked at me and reassured me that he would have the money for me soon, and that he would love me forever.

"Tadashi, I love you."

"I love you too, Kei"

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A/N

This story is also published on Wattpad! My user is - @arc271

The story link - https://www.wattpad.com/story/247869550-stay-a-little-longer