Conversations

Mikey had always loved the stars. The ray of sunshine raining down on him had always warmed his heart. The feeling that maybe, even as a small part of the universe, he could do mighty things. Because the stars believed in him, encouraged him, and that's why he often enjoyed escaping his chaotic life and taking a long look at the stars.

But it wasn't just him. All his life, he had tried to convince his brothers to take a small look, the tiniest look, but his brothers always told him that they were to old to enjoy those simple pleasures. So that left his father, who hadn't spent much time with him as if.

Though it wasn't by a long shot.

Mikey, who had been about ten years at the time, left his bedroom for some midnight snacks. And if he could manage it, leave the sewers and go look at the stars. If even for a small moment.

But once he saw his wise father sitting at the table, drinking his own conception of tea, Mikey knew that his shot was out of the window. There wasn't really a point to eating at that moment anymore, it was only an excuse that young child had managed to think of.

Turning around, the young child heaved a small sigh and begun to walk with slumped shoulders. If only his family understood, then maybe he wouldn't have to come up with small excuses to escape his gloomy life. But Mikey only knew so much, and his family was trying really hard to figure it out as well. The world wasn't something they had even considered to be somewhat safe. But it was a curios thing.

And as a small child, Mikey had has much hope as a young turtle could contain. But it was still somewhat small.

"Michelangelo?"

Mikey turned around at his father's voice, his father looked at him. Deeply.

"Yes Master?" The young child said quietly. There wasn't much he could say, his father had caught his emotions in one swipe. He could sense it, and Mikey hated him for it.

"Are you deeply saddened by something my son?"

"No," Mikey scoffed, "Of course not, I'm perfectly fine."

But his lie only seeped through, his father knew better.

"My son, I would appreciate it if you were honest. We honor honesty in our family, do we not?"

"Why of course Master, I'm just tired."

Master Splinter sighed. "Well then, head up now. I shall not keep you waiting any longer."

But truthfully, Mikey didn't want to go back up to his dark room. Though he just couldn't walk away into the sewers. So, he just stayed there, in the small spot, silently wishing that his father would beckon him to come sit back down.

"I sense something Michelangelo. Come sit with me," His father invited. Mikey nodded and willed his feet to move forward. Taking a seat, he looked up at his father and gave a heartfelt sigh.

His father leaned forward with thoughtful eyes. "What is it my son?"

"Father….do you think there's more out there?"

"That's a curious question indeed, but I rather say, there's a whole universe out there for us to discover. One day, maybe it will be you."

"Yet we only stay down here in the sewers...every day."

"That is true," Master Splinter took a sip of his tea, "But perhaps we are meant to discover it in a different way."

"A different way?" The young child questioned, tipping his head to the side. Of course, he'd always assumed that his father would not allow him and his brothers to go off exploring, but right now, his father was contradicting it both ways.

Master Splinter sighed. "One day my son, you will all grow up, I can't keep you trapped here. But may you discover the world in a different point of view. Unlike no other."

"Like the stars?"

His father smiled with delight. "Yes Michelangelo, chart the stars, explore forests, oceans, and much more. Because that's what important."

That was a first. His father prized certain possessions, and without a doubt, he would fight for some of them.

"But what about…I don't know…stuff?"

His father paused for a second and then got up, beckoning his son to follow him. Mikey did just that. Following his father into the sewers, and out of the manhole cover, the young child jumped unto a rooftop with his sensei in tote.

They both sat down on the rooftop concrete floor and laid back. Staring at the stars.

"I've seen you fascination my son, the stars are a beautiful thing, your right to love them." His sensei said very calmly. He looked over and saw Mikey with his beautiful blue eyes. His son was in heaven, he could see it in his eyes.

"It just seems that when I look at the stars, everything turns simple. And that maybe I could do anything I want."

"You can my son. You can do anything you set your mind to."

His young son pointed towards the stars. "I want to chart all of these."

"Michealangelo," His father said, "You've got the heart, and the mind. With a little help, you can chart every last star there is.

"I would love that father. You know what I just realized?"

Sensei gave a small smile. "What is that my son?"

"One day, I'm going to be a star. High up in the sky, where no one can hurt me. Life's simple up there, and I can't wait to join them," The young child said softly, "And when my brothers miss me, all they will have to do is look up, and I'll be there."

"A star….that's a creative thought. Well then, I'll be a star to."

Mikey giggled and snuggled into his father's embrace. At least he now had something he could share with his dear father.

Master Splinter rubbed his son's head affectionally. "My son, may your light shine so bright." He said softly. Although he had a feeling that he didn't need, his son's light would've shined anyways.

Michelangelo was special in that way.

"Hey daddy?"

"Yes, my son?"

"Do you think my older brothers will ever see the stars with me?"

Master Splinter looked up and smiled. "My son, I bet that they will share this bond with you some day. They watch after you overall."

"I can't wait," Mikey yawned, "That will be the best day ever."

His father smiled and cradled his child as he got up. It was time to go home.

TMNT

Mikey looked at his wall with tearful eyes, cradling a pillow in his chest as his legs were bent against the pillow. He just stared, and stared, and stared even more. There wasn't anything to do anyways, his only source of hope had died on the rooftop, and with that knife that had impaled his poor father through his stomach.

'Must have hurt' Mikey told himself. If anything, the young teen tried to not think about the night's events. They only saddened him, if not for his brothers, Mikey would've already had jumped and joined his father in the stars.

The stars

Mikey hadn't seen them in a long time. With all the current chaos and wars, the younger turtle hadn't had time to go look at something so simple. For his life was far from simple. And dangerous. No stars were worth death.

Still observing the tan wall, Mikey gave a small sigh and cried into the pillow. It wasn't fair, his father's death, the anxiety and depression that came with it. Not to mention how his other brothers were probably handling it.

Mikey didn't want to know

All he wanted to do was focus on himself and not the people around him. His emotional reserves were gone, there wasn't anything that the young turtle could've dealt with at the time. The only feeling left was anger.

'He's not gone,' Mikey told himself, sobbing into the pillow. Stifling his cries.

'But he is' another voice whispered back in his mind.

"NO, HE'S NOT!" Mikey yelled; he threw the pillow across the room. Of course, it hit the wall he had been overseeing for the past hour. The young turtle wrapped his arms around himself, lifting his head towards the ceiling, Mikey gave a strangled cry.

There wasn't anything else he could do

But the sad thing was that he wasn't crying from just his own pain, but rather his family's as well. Their father's death wasn't going to effect just him, but it would affect Leo, Raph, and Donnie. His family…torn apart. It was just to much to bear.

Mikey got up to retrieve his emotional-support pillow but stopped halfway when he heard a small knock on his door. He walked over and grabbed his pillow, but highly debated on answering his door.

Frankly, Mikey didn't want to talk to anyone at that moment. But his family was worried, and adding more worry to their plates wasn't fair. And nobody said that he had to be happy.

The young turtle set his pillow on his bed and walked over to the door. Hesitating, Mikey looked down at the yellow shiny door handle. He didn't have to open the door, nobody told him he had to. It would be easier if he just didn't answer the door.

But something deep down told him to take a chance.

Taking a deep breath, Mikey opened the door to find Donnie standing there with fresh tears streaming down his cheeks.

"Hey Don," Mikey croaked out, his voice still raw from crying.

"Hey Mike," Donnie said softly, "How are you?"

"Clearly not well bro, I'm not hiding that fact."

Donnie walked closer. "You don't need to, Mikey… our father just died. Nobody is fine right now."

"Then why are you here?"

Mikey leaned against the door frame. He really wanted his pillow right now. Maybe that could become his new father.

"I just wanted to…" Donnie scratched the back of his head nervously, "Never mind, it's stupid."

He turned to leave but Mikey grabbed his shoulder. "Please don't leave Donnie. And nothing you ever say is stupid."

"Fine, I was curious if you wanted to go look at the stars with me?"

Something in Mikey's eyes changed, his heart ached to do that. He really wanted to, but something just didn't feel right about leaving.

"And risk waking up the mother hen…I don't know Donnie."

"Mikey please, I need this," Donnie said quietly, he shuddered as another set of tears came crashing down his face.

"Please," He pleaded one more time for emphasis.

Mikey looked at his brother and saw the suffering in his eyes. He sighed, there wasn't a way that he could please everyone, but his family always came first.

"Of course, Donnie," Mikey softly smiled. "Let's go see those stars."

Donnie gave a relieved sigh and grabbed his younger brothers' arms. Usually, he wasn't very touchy with people, but he relinquished that fact. He needed his brother's touch.

The duo of brothers walked through the dank sewers and out into the open. Picking an ideal rooftop, Donnie and Mikey jumped unto it and laid down. Looking at the stars. The perfect stars.

"Thank you Outoto for bringing me here."

Mikey looked over at his brother, who was next to him with his arm laid protectively over his genius brother.

"No, thank you Ani. I needed this."

"I guess," Donnie continued on, "I never really loved to watch the stars, but when you and dad…." Donnie had a slight hesitation and started to cry once again.

"I get it," patting his older brothers' arms affectionately, Mikey gave a slight wheeze. "I will miss this."

There was a moment of silence, and for once, both brothers appreciated it. Hearing the insects chirp, children laughing from the streets below, was quite refreshing. If only they could laugh without a worry in a world.

But they were mutants, for the same reason, got their father killed. But staring at the bright luminating stars above, Mikey found a moment of peace. And hoped his brother had found the same.

His father was up there, dancing and singing with the simplicities of life. It was simple up there. At least his father was happy.

"You know…" Mikey said softly, glancing at his older brother, "Me and dad used to have conversations up here all the time."

"About what?"

"I used to say that someday I would be a star and chart every single one of them. It was a silly dream. But I still believe that someday, we will all become stars."

"Just like dad," Donnie smiled warmly. Truthfully, he hadn't thought about it like that. It was funny how his younger brother seemed to be smarter than the rest of them combined sometimes. Guess that shows that no one should underestimate Mikey.

He was a small little dude

Donnie snuggled into Mikey's chest. "Is it ok if we stay up here a little longer?"

"If you can deal with the mother hen at home, then of course," Mikey chuckled.

But Donnie didn't care if he got lectured or yelled at. At least he could drag his brother with him, jokingly of course.

"We'll deal with Leo later," he said softly. Mikey gave a small reassuring squeeze.

There wasn't a star that wasn't shining down on them that night, their father's star shining the brightest.