1 Facing Obstacles

"Qin Feng!" The short male slammed his locker shut and shouldered his bag as his name was bellowed. It didn't sound that close by but he still glanced down the hallway where many other students were conversing or rummaging through their own lockers, preparing for the next set of classes. Nonetheless Qin Feng knew who it was before they even broke around the corner.

"Qin Feng!" The deep, mellow shout of his name came again just as the persons figure finally burst into view, creating a beeline through the throngs of students and coming straight for him. Those nearby surveyed the loud disruption and most actively rolled their eyes when they saw Zhen Rong barreling down the hall with a wide grin on his face.

His messy, black hair blew against his forehead because of the speed he was running at, like a pack of wild wolves found him particularly appetizing and were right on heels. The bag he carried on one shoulder was already close to falling off and his open sweater flapped at his sides--- but the universe wasn't always kind and as it were, Zhen Rong all of a sudden tripped and fell just a few feet in front of Qin Feng; instant laughter and snickers rung out from bystanders.

Qin Feng quickly hurried over to his friend and grabbed a hold of his arm to try and help him up. Zhen Rong's backpack now hung off his forearm and one side of his open sweater slipped off a slender shoulder.

"Oh my gosh, Xiao Rong, are you okay?" Qin Feng voiced his surprise and worry although he shouldn't be. His best friend tripping over air was sadly something that occurred regularly and between their group of friends, it was almost a routine.

"Ouch" Zhen Rong whined softly and rubbed his forehead, readjusting his bag strap to once again rest on his shoulder. He looked up at Qin Feng with a small pout forming from his soft pink lips before giving a sheepish smile filled with embarrassment; averting his gaze. Qin Feng felt warm at the endearing gestures coming from the male in front of him. He sighed before flashing Zhen Rong a smile, lifting a finger to playfully poke the same spot he had been rubbing.

"You're so clumsy" he said simply.

Zhen Rong then laughed and a wider smile broke out on Qin Feng's face witnessing his tall friend's gleaming demeanor. Even after his laughter died down the smile never removed itself from Zhen Rong's features and as if suddenly remembering something his face switched into that of realization and then of excitement; already forgetting about the embarrassing mishap he had not seconds before. That was his best friend's best trait, the ability to swallow his mistakes and pick himself back up and Qin Feng envied that part of Zhen Rong--- to just be himself.

Qin Feng's chest warmed familiarly at the sight of Zhen Rong's pearly white smile and sparkling eyes. It was a sensation that had grown stronger and stronger since the moment he could comprehend the reasons why just seeing this male brought him inexplicable joy.

"What is it?" Qin Feng asked thoughtfully. Whenever Zhen Rong was happy it always puts him in a good mood as well.

The taller male wordlessly brought his bag to his front, unzipping the top part and then searching through it before letting the bag swing back to his side while he held up a white envelope in front of his face. In that moment Qin Feng's smile gradually fell at the sight of the crisp white paper, a familiar dread filling up from his stomach to his chest.

"What's this?" He asked but in truth Qin Feng already knew what is was, he's seen the same thing multiple times before and it always ended badly resulting in his friend locking himself in his room with mountains of tissues on the floor, barely eating and drowning in tears.

"A confession letter, silly" Zhen Rong was still looking at him happily, lowering the envelope.

"I thought I told you a few weeks ago that I had a serious crush on one of our seniors?" his smile fell to a shy one and his big brown eyes moved to the floor then back to Qin Feng's now expressionless ones.

"Oh? I must not have remembered" Qin Feng commented in a neutral tone bordering on bitter before he started walking down the hall towards his class that was about to start soon. He heard Zhen Rong laugh, not taking note of his friends change in behaviour.

Zhen Rong draped an arm over Qin Feng's shoulder and pulled him closer while leaning down a bit in order to send a sweet smile his way that quickly had Qin Feng's heart stuttering in his chest. He turned away so that the taller male wouldn't be able to witness his flushed appearance. This was not healthy; the slightest smile, the slightest look and the slightest touch sent him into a frenzy; their own friends could see Qin Feng's feelings despite his attempt at subtlety and even poked fun at him about it but the one person he wanted to notice them most was painfully unaware.

"You have such bad memory, Xiao Feng. Even since we were kids" Zhen Rong stated with his arm still comfortably around Qin Feng while they turned a corner.

"Anyway, the senior I'm talking about is Cai Hong" Zhen Rong informed and with that Qin Feng visibly stiffened.

He wasn't sure if he had heard right---he hoped he hadn't heard it right. Cai Hong was the captain of the schools drama club, the same one that their friend Tang Li happened to be in. He was handsome and very popular amongst the student body and within his circle of friends but rumor served that Cai Hong wasn't as nice as everyone thought, Tang Li himself described him as curt, obnoxious and strict; entitled at worse.

"Cai Hong?" Qin Feng questioned and Zhen Rong nodded giving him a confused look when seeing the others reaction. Maybe something in his features or voice gave away his skepticism or even hurt because his friend then asked, "Xiao Feng, is something wrong?" Zhen Rong's pretty eyes roamed over his face but the shorter male just shook his head.

"Are you sure about this?" Qin Feng asked with a nervous laughter. The rumors of Cai Hong have been circling since they entered the school as freshmen but no one outside of those that were close to him knew if they were real or not but Qin Feng trusted Tang Li and another part of him, the part that ached for the male beside him, wished he would change his mind and say no; that this was all just a joke and that he wasn't going to go back to doing these confessions only to get hurt and inadvertently drive knives into Qin Feng's chest.

"Of course!" Zhen Rong exclaimed, unhinging from Qin Feng's side and leaving a cool breeze to blow where his warmth had been. "He helped me pick up all those printed papers I dropped when I tripped over my feet once, it was the first time I met him face to face. We've talked a couple times after that and he even brought me out for coffee more than once as well" Zhen Rong explained.

Qin Feng watched his long time friend--- the person he has overwhelming feelings for, smile dreamily as he talked about the guy he liked and his chest tightened uncomfortably. Why couldn't it be him who he talked about like that?

"But the rumors say he isn't as nice as he makes you believe. Even Tang Li sa--" Qin Feng tried to dissuade his friend but Zhen Rong just waved him off, finally arriving in front of Qin Feng's classroom.

"Rumors are almost always wrong plus I really like him, Feng" Zhen Rong placed a big hand on the short males shoulder. "I've been going to the drama room a lot to watch him practice, also I think he likes me too. Cai Hong always smiles when he sees me and makes time for me; he even laughs at my jokes".

I do all that, Qin Feng couldn't help but think. Coming down from his daydream, Zhen Rong met Qin Feng's eyes fully and his big brown ones glistened. "So I'm going to place this letter in his locker and confess to him after school" he looked so sure of himself but Qin Feng couldn't bring himself to smile with him, he never could. Each time he only ended up wishing that one day he could receive one of those letters.

Just then the bell rang loudly, piercing through his melancholy and the many hallways, bringing in last minute stragglers who rushed past Qin Feng to get into the classroom. Zhen Rong backed up and shot two thumbs up at his best friend who unwillingly did the same. Qin Feng watched his tall friend turn around and run back in the opposite direction and out of sight before sighing heavily and entering his own class.

He had a really bad feeling settling over him. He remembered the first time Zhen Rong did something like this, Qin Feng and the others supported him but that was before he got way too deep into his feelings for his best friend and was still confused.

Zhen Rong had written one of his letters to a classmate he had befriended and really liked. He had confessed only for that boy to cut all ties with him completely and avoid him like the plague. Zhen Rong had acted as if he were fine but never showed up to school for a week after that until Qin Feng went to find him at home wallowing in sadness and his parents trying their best to console him. Qin Feng had wanted to ruin the kid but his sorrow filled friend didn't let him; said he'd much rather forget about it.

After that, every so often Zhen Rong developed a crush it always ended with avoidance or name calling. Once he confessed to another boy who spread around a rumor that Zhen Rong was an 'STD carrying faggot', for months people all around school kept their distance and whispered behind his back. Qin Feng knew his friend had a hard time back then and had honestly thought his impulsive confessions were over after so long of not ever seeing another letter--- until today.

Qin Feng just didn't want him to hurt anymore, he's been through enough especially when most students already saw him as a weird specimen. Qin Feng sighed and let his teacher's words wash over him, not absorbing anything while he worried about his friend and that stupid envelope.