8 Realizations
This chapter delay was brought to you by the following: Xcom, Xcom 2, Dragon's Dogma, the game that is called life cuz I had to go job hunting (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻
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Disclaimer: I don't own My Hero Academia and Dark Souls, both belongs to their respective owners, Kohei Horikoshi and FromSoftware respectively (Can't wait for Dragon's Dogma 2)
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"This tastes good." Izuku smiled as he shoveled spoonful after spoonful of the katsudon his mother promised to make him. As he did so, his mother watched with a relieved smile as she beheld the sight of her son once again making himself at home after an… unprecedented amount of time away…
'Stop thinking about it.' Inko chided herself as she shakily lifted up her own spoonful of katsudon into her mouth. 'He's here. He's back. He won't leave me again…'
As the doubts plagued her mind, Izuku continued on, feeding himself the natural goodness that was his mother's homemade dish, a luxury he never did appreciate that much back before the time he was brought to that accursed land.
"Thank you, mom." Izuku suddenly spoke his heart out, a far cry from his behavior in the past. It quietly stilled his mother from continuing with her meal, but it was enough to grab Inko out of her spiral downwards into self-doubt and self-loathing.
"Your welcome, Izuku." Inko managed a smile, one that sent Izuku into cloud nine.
'Such a beautiful smile.' Izuku quickly shoved his head behind his bowl as he continued shoveling the food down his throat. 'When was the last time I saw her like this…'
The memories came unbidden. Nothing too detailed, what with his spotty memory, but it was there. He remembered the fateful time in that damned office. The time when his life began to spiral out of control.
The time when everything began to fall.
His friends were the first to go. Next were the doubts that began to surround him. After that was the worry of his mother…
'Why did I keep on worrying her…?' Izuku stopped for a moment, but immediately resumed lest he worry his mother once more. 'What was wrong with me before I grew up…?'
And that was just the thing that changed ever since he returned. He grew up. Sure, he couldn't remember half of the things that happened in his life before Lordran. Hell, he couldn't remember even a fourth of his journey in Lordran except for the important parts.
But even he knew how different he was before and after his journey. He can seldomly recall the idiotic, optimistic kid he once used to be, but even associating himself with the persona was, quite frankly, disgusting on multiple levels.
He hated himself then and there. Hated himself for being a burden on his mother. Hated himself for being an idiot.
Hated himself for not changing no matter how many times the world told him to…
"Honey, are you alright?" Izuku perked up from the self-destructive thoughts encompassing his mind. He never noticed that he had already placed down his bowl and just stared at it as the time ticked on. "If you still want more, I can cook up another batch."
"It's fine… It's fine…" Izuku gave his mother a placating grin as he pushed the bowl away from himself. "The food was great! Delicious! I can remember why I like the food and your cooking now!"
"Oh, is that so?" Inko appreciated the thought of her son regaining his memories, but something told her that even now, her son was suffering deep inside. Still, no matter how much she wanted to broach the topic, she didn't know how to and pushed it to the side. "That's good then. Look forward to more of your mother's cooking in the future, Izuku."
Ending on a cheery note, Izuku smiled and helped his mother clean up. It was a quiet affair, with both of them content with the silence that hung around the air. Once all was said and done, Inko retired back to her room after giving Izuku her well-wishes and a sweet kiss on the forehead goodnight.
As he saw his mother go to bed, Izuku's lost his grin as the silence kept him company.
Humming a disharmonious tune, Izuku crept slowly to his bedroom, his mind playing the events that happened back in the precinct and the dining room table.
'A hero…' Izuku frowned. With the memories coming up ever so slowly, he found the reason why he had refused to change. 'Can I still be a hero…?'
A hero, the term that was the reason for him to refuse change, to refuse to mature and grow up. It was the term that kickstarted his descent into depression in the past, but it was also the beacon of light that guided him through trials thick and thin. It was the main reason why he remained steadfast, to object reality and rage against the confines of his own shortcomings.
It was both his blessing, and his curse. And with his experiences in Lordran, being a hero was now an attainable goal instead of an impossible one.
If he were to ask someone of questionable sanity if he could still be a hero, they would probably say yes, and that is if they were only a part of his tiny circle of friends.
Not Patches though, he would just troll the ever-living hell out of him.
But yes, they would probably go tell him to be a hero he wanted to be. Solaire might even give him another speech about jolly cooperation when times are hard.
"I wonder where he is right now." Izuku's frown deepened. That last time he saw him, Solaire was sitting in that giant hallway all depressed and all. Hopefully, he was able to find his sun after whatever happened there.
But nevertheless, it was time for him to rest. It was a long, long time since he was able to sleep peacefully. Hopefully, he would be able to without any problems.
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Izuku was not able to sleep.
Truth be told, he was aware of this. Rest just wouldn't come to him, no matter how hard he tried. It was an effect that happened to all of those who were cursed in Lordran, and he was no exception.
He just held out hope that now that he was back home, he could finally put all of the bad things behind him and move on, but nope, the mark that was branded on him refused to fade into obscurity.
"Fuck me, I guess." Izuku moaned as he got up from the chair and unplugged the desktop plug. "On the bright side, I can somewhat remember how society in Japan works… Maybe…"
Izuku exited his room and made a beeline for the bathroom. In all of his travels through Lordran, the one thing that he missed dearly, other than his mom and all other things associated with her, was bathing.
There was no clean water back in Lordran, and it was a trial and a half just to get his armor clean from all the gunk and muck when he took a trip to Blighttown, or if the blood of his enemies just got stuck between the armor joints.
Speaking of which, where was his gear anyway?
"Did I bring the bottomless box with me?" Izuku drenched himself in the water as the shower head continued spraying him with ice-cold goodness. "I'm pretty sure I left the bottomless box back in Firelink Shrine… Actually, I did give Patches the go ahead to help himself to my gear if I didn't return…"
And then Izuku went pale.
"Fuck, Patches has my gear."
