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Soul Shard Captor [BL] [QT]

After Noah's much-awaited ascension, what greeted him was an AI system calling itself Black, offering him a job working for the World and Soul Management Bureau.  He has to transmigrate into different worlds, using an identity of some unfortunate soon-to-be-dead dude, and live out the remainder of his new life there however he wanted. Oh, and hopefully in the process of living happily ever after, he'd also get to accidentally complete some secret mission they refused to tell him about. Easy-peasy! ...Right? ...Ok, sure, there are a few small kinks here and there... like terrorist attacks, murder plots, zombie apocalypses, hostile alien invasions, and the like... but one should always look at the bright side! Noah: "...Blackie, is it just me, or is this good brother-in-law of mine looking at me like a hungry wolf seeing a juicy piece of meat?" (°△°|||) Black: "How would you know how a hungry wolf looks like? Have you ever seen one?" Noah: "What? No! But…!" ( ꒪Д꒪) Black: "Exactly. Don't worry, host. He is just a bit excited due to nearly losing his life back there. You know, adrenaline." (¬‿¬) Noah: "…are you sure that's what's really going on here?" Black: "Absolutely!" (≖‿≖) … Noah: "Blackie! Blackie! His-his-his little brother is poking me in the ass!!" QAQ Black: "What are you making such a big fuss about? It's just morning wood." Noah: "Why am I making such a big fuss?!? He just took it out of his pants!!!" щ(゚Д゚щ) Black: "So? How is he supposed to take care of it if he doesn't take it out?" Noah: "I don't know, but definitely not like this!!!" QAQ Black: "Relax! Bros often help each other out with these kinds of things." Noah: "…" … Noah: "What do you have to say now?!? It's normal for good bros to want to shove their thing up your ass?!?" (ꐦ °Д°) Black: "Yes… if they are bent… and in love with you… like this one…" Noah: "…" ಠ_ಠ Noah: "Oh god, he is putting it in!!!! Blackie! Help!!!" QAQ Black: "Don't panic. Relax and follow my instructions." (︶^︶)ノ Noah: "Ok, ok, speak! Hurry!" Black: "You've got this. Breath in, breath out. Relax your muscles…" Noah: "How is this helping??" ( ꒪Д꒪) Black: "It'll hurt less that way." ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Noah: "…Whose system are you, mine or his?!?" (ノ꒪Д꒪)ノ︵ ┻━┻ -- Many, many missions later -- Noah: "This secret mission that you can't tell me about… it can't possibly be to get fucked by the the least appropriate target?!" ಠ_ಠ Black: "Of-of course not! Ho-how could that possibly be, eh?" (; ゚ 3゚ )~ ML: Right, right, that's just a very (not so) coincidental bonus. Ψ(╹ڡ╹ )Ψ Author Note: * SSC has long arcs. Each world is a fully-fledged novel on its own, which means that technically transmigrations aren't "quick". * Don't let the summary (or the cover) fool you! While SSC does have an occasional explicit smut, it is primarily a fluffy and hilarious romance! * Pairings are one-on-one and taboo-ish. (E.g. hired assassin and his target, monster tamer and his tamed beast, master and disciple, siblings, brothers-in-law, etc.) * More info in the info chapter Author website: lucypandora.com Support the author on ko-fi: ko-fi.com/lucypandora Discord: lucypandora.com/discord

LucyPanDora · LGBT+
Not enough ratings
208 Chs

Definitely working for the other side!!

Cordia daddy's face shriveled up so much it looked like a prune. Then he forced a smile on, that looked so ugly it would have been better to just cry instead, "That's… that's great… that you two…" Cordia daddy swallowed hard, "…get along so well …but since that's the case… I think it would be better if the two of you slept separately until the wedding."

Noah's eyebrows shot up. His dad seemed to have misunderstood the relationship between Levi and him?

Ai, but that wasn't the main issue here! (っ °Д °;)っ

"Dad, without my soothing–" Noah hurried to explain, but his objection was interrupted by Cordia daddy's firm declaration, "You are not the only Soother in Concordia. If he needs soothing, then I'll just hire another Soother for him."

Noah's protest abruptly died in his throat, and he suddenly felt enlightened. Oh! So there was this solution too! Why didn't he think of it before?!

Blackie, 'Gee, I, too, wonder why… (¬‿¬) Ai, it's almost like your thinking was compromised due to something incredibly implausible like falling in love…'

Seeing his days of eating big mouthfuls of tofu about to fly away into the distance, it now became Levi's turn to feel like he had swallowed a fly. His face that had been wearing a scowl all along turned especially dark.

"Their soothing won't be as effective…" The valiant warrior, Astar Levi, put up one final, dying struggle.

With the backing of his own son, Cordia daddy felt as if he suddenly grew wings. His hunched back straightened valiantly, and he plunged into the fray without any fear, "True, but do you really need an SS-ranked soothing just to sleep peacefully?"

Cordia daddy had only just managed to finish voicing out this rhetorical question when his shameless son-in-law deadpanned with 100% assurance, "Need." (≖ ‸ ≖)

'You think you are the only one that can act shamelessly?!' Cordia daddy internally ground his teeth but outwardly retained his genial smile, pretending not to have heard him, "We will only know if we try it out first. And even if their soothing is no good, so what? Are you saying we can't afford to rebuild or renovate a wing or two of the manor? Hmph. If you have a nightmare, then you have a nightmare. No big deal."

That's right, if things get broken, they will just fix them! Baby Noah was convinced. With his pure heart clear of worries, he turned to reassuringly pat Levi's shoulder, "Dad has a point. It is too late now to move beds. You'll be more comfortable sleeping in one of those nice, large beds in the guest rooms." And he even added, "My soothing is not yet fully recovered anyway, so I can only passively soothe you right now. Even if I am an SS-ranked Soother, passive soothing doesn't have the same efficacy as active soothing. You are better off getting soothed by another Soother tonight."

His baby had already spoken; what else could Levi say? No matter how dark his face was, all he could do was to grit his teeth and swallow down his indignation and bitterness. And so, while dragging his legs towards the guest room, Astar Levi kept internally cursing his father-in-law and throwing wistful glances towards his baby all the way until he turned the corner.

'This is not over!' Levi silently promised to himself. 'I'll remember this, father-in-law!'

***

That day, after the wedding change announcement, the netizens went mad. The internet was set on fire, proving without the shadow of a doubt that homo sapiens loved watching the world burn.

Servers of social media sites crashed several times, making their tech support personnel nearly cough out blood. The media had a field day, their creative juices flowing quicker than the saliva dripping from a famished dog smelling the scent of meat. As if injected with top-grade stimulants, one click-bait title after another kept popping out without stop.

Nay-sayers cried it was all a conspiracy. Empathizers cried that they knew it all along – no way Maery and Levi had anything between them! Yet those who cried the loudest of all were the outraged "girlfriend" fans of Cordia Aris. Their wonderful dream of one day snatching themselves one Cordia Aris was slaughtered in cold blood just like that! ‎(ノಥAಥ)ノ ┻━┻

If he had been snatched by some otherworldly beauty, they could understand, but their darling had been kidnapped by a big and fierce man known far and wide for his shitty personality! This accursed Astar Levi will definitely not treat their precious prince well!

Overnight, voodoo dolls of Astar Levi (bundled with a lovely set of needless 👍), became popular and started selling like hotcakes.

It wasn't just Aris' fans that were outraged – that day, many boys and girls cried tears of blood because the two most eligible bachelors took each other off the market! How would their little hearts not bleed?! What a waste of resources!! QAQ 'Bros, can't you leave something good for the rest of us?!?'

Of course, besides voodoo dolls, some other merchandise saw a booming rise in sales, too… ahem, ahem… Certain artists and writers of refined taste felt just as inspired as their journalist comrades and started to pump out some questionable drawings and writings that brought endless joy to fujo–ahem, a special part of the female population…

***

In the dead of night, after all of the bedroom lights had been extinguished, deep within the Cordia manor, a dark figure emerged from the cover of shadows.

Its steps made no sound as it floated down the hall of the deathly still manor like a ghost.

With steely determination, an unwavering heart, and a clear goal in mind, it slowly honed in on its target. Creeping upon a certain bedroom door like a predator cornering its prey.

Yet, as the very door it had been searching for laid right in front of it, the silence of the night was shattered by a polite voice, "Mr. Levi, is there something you need from my young master this late at night?"

The flower thief, Astar Levi, dressed in black from head to toe and floating with his Enforcer power, wordlessly stared at the two bodyguards stationed in front of Noah's door by the astute Cordia daddy, "…" (ꐦಠAಠ) '…I underestimated your shrewdness, father-in-law! But I assure you, it shall not happen again! Next time, I shall… I shall…'

"Mr. Levi? Is there an issue?" Levi's inspiring internal monologue of grudges and vengeance was interrupted by the same guard who had previously spoken.

"No…" Levi swallowed down his resentment, "Just looking for the toilet." (¬_¬;)

The bodyguard in question responded with a knowing smile, "There is one directly connected to your guest room."

Levi, "…" ಠ_ಠ 'Who hired this tactless buffoon?! You…! You must be one of Trey's, right?! Definitely working for the other side!!' (ꐦ °Д°)

Astar Levi's floating form slumped back to the ground, and he grouchily trotted back to his own bedroom. He had waited so long to sneak into his baby's bed too! All the way until that blasted Soother left! Yet in the end…

'No! This is not a defeat! Just a tactical retreat!' Levi comforted his broken heart, 'I shall be the final victor! In the end, your resistance is simply futile, father-in-law! (ꐦ ≖ ‸ ≖) Mark my words! Two days! Your cabbage will be dug up by me in two days!'

"Mr. Levi, the light switch is to your right," The faithful guard helpfully reminded, "You might hit something if you continue walking in the dark."

As if on cue, Levi tripped.

Not due to actually running into something, but due to the sheer nerve of this person!! As if he couldn't tell that he had intentionally sneaked over in the dark!!!

'I'll remember you, nameless guard!!' (ꐦ ≖ ‸ ≖)

***

The next morning, Noah woke up fully refreshed, completely unaware that he had almost been visited by a rogue in the dead of night. Such a good night's rest! Oh, how nice it was to NOT be woken up by something hard and stiff poking your behind! ╰(*°▽°*)╯

Noah merrily exited his room only to run into Levi, who, judging by his slightly bloodshot eyes and gloomy aura, definitely did not have a good rest.

'Sure enough!' Noah sighed a bit wryly, and yet, a bit coyly, 'My soothing is still the best.'

Blackie, '…of course it is. Other people's soothing services don't include jerking the other off or hugging them to sleep.' (¬‿¬)

I know many of you are dying for the wedding to come already. Patience, comrades, we are nearly there. There are two days left now before the wedding, and this pair of husbands will do a lot of misc things during these days like picking rings, changing honeymoon plans, etc. which I don’t intend to go into detail about. 

There will be a couple of scenes with Levi x Noah sugar and a bunch of words about the terrorist investigation results, but after this, the case will be nearly solved. The only thing left will be just apprehending the masterminds.

So these two days will pass quickly, and we will reach that wedding in no time.

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