See

In 2014, I was 25 years old, a newcomer who had just entered the workforce for a few years.

He, I don't know.

Perhaps, already married.

Or maybe he's happy now, and he doesn't want me to bother him.

But I can't help it, I can only do this, I need to look forward and not stay in the past.

So, I decided to go through today with the last shred of hope.

If it goes well, you can see him. If it doesn't go well, it should be regarded as cutting off this thought for yourself, and it is not a loss.

...

I met Chen Yi when I was a sophomore in high school.

I remember very clearly that it was snowing very well, and there was a thick layer of snow on the ground.

The last time I came to school before the winter break was to pick up materials and winter vacation homework.

It just so happened that the head teacher said that the final exam results were out, and he left the report card in the classroom for us to take turns to read.

When the report card came in, I still had some hope in my heart, but from top to bottom, I was already halfway through the report card, and I still didn't see my name.

My heart was already half cold, and I had a sense of foreboding.

I opened my eyes and looked at it again, very carefully, even with my fingers, but my name was still missing from the first half.

I knew that I was going to be cool this time.

My heart was full of loss, and I didn't have the courage to continue looking, and I planned to pass the list to the person next to me.But the moment it was handed out, it was so coincidental that I saw my name at a very low position.

Lin Shu, class rank 26, grade rank 378.

For me, these words are like the five-finger mountain that presses on Sun Wukong, and it also makes me breathless.

Although my grades are not top-notch, I have always been in the top 10 in my class.

This exam is a big joint exam organized by our city school, which is very important.

So this result is a really big blow for me.

His eyes suddenly soured, and tears were already rolling in his eyes.

I wanted to cry, but I felt so ashamed.

When the tears were about to fall, I ran out with the documents in my arms.

I don't like to be seen as vulnerable, because then I will be called hypocritical and I may be hated.

I don't want to be hated...

After I got out of the classroom, I tried my best to restrain myself as I walked, and I couldn't cry.

It didn't take long for me to calm down.

Only then did I suddenly realize that there was heavy snow like goose feathers floating in the air.

I don't know when the snow started, but now there is a thin layer on the ground.

The whole campus has become a cold and glittering area, and it really looks a little different kind of beauty.

It was snowing, but I didn't have an umbrella with me.

It's just like that, and it's pretty good for me.

After leaving the school gate, I followedThat road goes all the way.

The snow was getting heavier and heavier, and the snow that fell overhead was denser than it had just been.

There were two people walking next to me, a father and daughter, and I was a little stunned.

They laughed as they walked, and the two of them played an umbrella, but the umbrella was obviously slanted, and the other shoulder of the father was already soaked.

Behold, she is so happy.

I don't know why, but the little girl's smile seems to be very contagious.

Watching her laugh, I laughed too.

Before I knew it, a warm liquid flowed through my cheeks, which was very different from the feeling of the snowflakes falling on my face.

In the cold weather, the skin is also quite sensitive, and this warm feeling is also extremely uncomfortable with this snowy day.

I wanted to wipe away my tears, but I couldn't free my hands when I was holding the book.

I couldn't believe I could still laugh in this situation.

It turns out that there is no deception in the book, and when you see others happy, you will really cry.

I turned around and prepared to go home, thinking that was the end of the day.

But when I was passing by the middle school, I saw the man, who had come to pick up his son and take him home.

This scene is quite similar to the father and daughter just now, but I am not happy to look at it.

Yes, he will always be so precious to his son, and he will always have only a cold reprimand for me.

Suddenly, the man's eyes suddenly turned to this side, and he saw me.

But he pretended to turn a blind eye.I hated and feared the look in his eyes the most, which was more indifferent than a stranger.

What's the matter, are you afraid that I'm in trouble?

Or is it that there is only one umbrella, so you can't give me a shot, and you don't want to talk to me even from afar.

He's still the same, and he hates the way I look.

I didn't go over and take the initiative to say hello to them, but it's enough to experience such a thing as a hot face and a cold ass.

I am not humble to that extent, and I still demand that he be good to me.

That kind of treatment will always be hard to come by.

Forget it, it doesn't matter, it's been like this for so many years, and it's not bad this time.

Eventually, I went home covered in snow.

It's not his home that I went back to, it's my own home.

In the past, I would still have hoped for him, thinking that if I became more sensible and my grades became better, he would find out that I was good and his attitude towards me would change.

But no, I told myself again and again that he just didn't find out what was good about me, but my expectations were shattered again and again.

He still hates me as much as ever, even more than ever.

I kept reflecting on myself, but I really didn't know what I was doing wrong...

Later, I figured it out, and I didn't get obsessed with it, I wanted to study hard, escape from him, and live on my own.

So when I was in high school, I thought I was already capable of living and doing it on my ownI just moved out and rented a house.

Since then, the guy has been giving me less and less pocket money, and I don't want to keep asking him for it.

He hated me in the first place, and when I went to him, I was scolded again, so I kept saving money.

When I couldn't even pay the rent, I went to him, but he said I was going to move out myself. It has nothing to do with him, I'll figure it out myself.

What could I do, so I chose to work part-time.

But I was only 17 years old at the time, and I wasn't even an adult, and there was almost no place for people like me, and they didn't dare to use them.

I had to work part-time in the school cafeteria, but they didn't pay me, they just ate my meals.

But you don't have to be too tired, and you can save money on food.

In the second semester of my freshman year of high school, my grandmother from the countryside heard about this and came to our school from the town to find me, saying that she was not at ease.

I tried to pretend that I was happy in front of her, to let her know that I was doing well and not to worry her.

But my grandmother can see my hard work, and only she understands me best.

I hugged her and cried for a long time that day.

Later, she stayed here, taking care of me to and from school, and making sure that I had food when I came home from school, so that I would not be so pitiful.