Seeking Comfort

Noelle hailed a taxi cab by 6pm out front and let him take her to Bragia.

She's wearing a tiny dress, ending at the middle of her thighs, and some heels. Noelle cascaded her hair behind her back, too, and didn't mind putting on a heavy make-up. It's Blake. He'd understand she's being envious to girls who looks too cute passing through.

When she's on the ride, Noelle kept on getting distracted by swiping down on Cole Rodriguez's social media. She checked every photo, every achievement, every good-looking pictures. It makes Noelle wonder what kind of life she's been leading now if she said yes to Cole.

Will she be able to be a good partner and wife to him?

Does Noelle wouldn't suffer from surviving each day if she agreed to be in a relationship with him?

It started to rain. She perked up in the car seat to see the road being drizzled. Several thoughts ran in her head: from her mom, from her career, her dreams of becoming a college degree holder, of walking away from porn, and… Blake.

He fixed her. Noelle wouldn't be here if it weren't for Blake's repair.

"We're here, mademoiselle." Noelle woke up from reverie. She stuffed in the cell phone inside her purse and carried on with the date. After all, the Blake she's seeing now is a new one.

She walked in and gave the receipt of reservation made by Blake. Some eyes gawked in her direction, but it's not strange. It didn't give her the creeps anymore. They must have thought she was a living doll, but overall, Noelle didn't care.

Everyone can see her naked body up in the websites, and that's all there is, nothing more.

A man's wallet was present at the side, and Noelle knew he's already here.

Moments later, and they finally saw each other after weeks. Noelle didn't hesitate to stand up and give her a marvelous hug. Blake was delighted to see her girlfriend after being away from her. He plastered a huge smile.

Blake and Noelle hugged each other for a moment with whispers of 'I miss you'.

Noelle was the first one to separate and say, "It's so long. I want to eat you right now."

Blake cackled and rubbed the top of her head, whispering, "We have to fill our stomachs first."

Then, they decided to eat. Appetizer, main course, dessert. They talked endlessly, and like the usual routine, they didn't run out of topics to explore. It was probably one of the best nights she ever had. Not to mention how it is getting to be ruined.

From the way he looked and avoided Monica in their conversation, Noelle smelled her instincts going wayward. It doesn't go the direction she used to know. Before, Blake talked badly about girls lurking around him, but he doesn't entertain them well because he already had a girlfriend.

Noelle felt like goofing around that time. All happy and romantic in between the lines, but she never saw the intention of Blake doing it a hundred percent. Right now, her hunch with Blake and Monica's relationship may be right. But she had to confirm it.

At the right time, the evidence would find its way to her hands.

"How's the filming there? Was it fun? I mean… you and Monica."

Noelle tried again. She was watching his body language, and it fits in her curiosity.

"Yeah, it is. How about you and Cole? Looks like the two of you are having a really great time." He retrieved one of the glasses and drank the soda. Noelle licked her lips and tasted the dessert served. She smiled sweetly, inducing jealousy towards Blake.

His jaw went rigid and slowly put down the dessert spoon.

Blake asked sharply, "So, how does he look like when he's naked?"

Noelle found a good question to strike back. She looked at his boyfriend with a sarcastic smile and stated, "He's good. He's like any other porn stars. Big, brusque, his body filled with muscles."

Blake's stares became a stone. Her descriptions become a fuel to his anger.

"Plus, what I said to you on the phone call. He offered me a big amount to star in just a short script with him as the male lead. I'm accepting it today after our date. I came to think that I can buy a car and at least attain an apartment for myself."

Noelle has dreams, too, and not a single fix of Blake can mend it.

He didn't comment for a while. The silence stretched on for minutes.

Blake was the one who spoke first, "You already decided, so I don't have a say for it."

Noelle furrowed her eyebrows and looked at him straight. Does he think that she would consult every decision she was going to make just because it boosts his ego somehow?

Noelle's annoyance became a habit, and she suddenly burst, "When you accepted that position in the new headquarters, did you consult me or even said it beforehand?"

It surprised Blake. Moreover, he expected Noelle to be a pushover.

She pursed her lips. Well, it's not the same girl anymore. She's changing, and yeah, the change was something Blake doesn't like.

Noelle stated, "You said it to me while you're feeling down, and I was hopeless with my response because you already made a decision. I can't take it back from you because it was your dream to expand. I didn't hold that against you and let you leave."

Blake didn't finish his dessert and stared blankly at Noelle.

"Now, I have my offer, too. It's my chance to expand, Blake. And I don't like you saying that I decided without you. After all, we're alone in this industry. We don't do conjoined decisions in porn," Noelle pointed out. She pushed the dessert plate at the center of the table.

She knew it was a bad decision to see him. Noelle can sense he was having a good time with Monica. Blake did the same thing and unbutton one of his coats. She crossed her arms over her chest and said, "Do you think I don't sense that you're having a good time with Monica? You don't frequently call now due to your busy schedule. I've been waiting for your calls, for your texts, everything that you do to me before."

Noelle shook her head. "I know you're being attached to her. She has liked you since day one. Me? I turned you down a couple of times before saying yes. Oh, it must be quite a good job to handle two different ladies swooning over…"

Blake answered back in a deep voice, "You have no right to accuse me."

"Oh, I'm accusing you now?" Noelle asked, horrified by the reaction he had.

"Are you saying that I had been such a terrible boyfriend for not doing the things I had been doing to you all this time?"

"Well, of course, you are soon becoming one! I don't feel like I even have a boyfriend at all!"

Blake widened his eyes. It was such an astonishing word that shook the hell out of him and to Noelle, too. Both of them were dead-beaten in their stares. As quiet as the table become, Noelle gritted her teeth and calmed down.

"I accepted that we are changing. That we are growing old, and we are becoming independent to what we do. I know all of that, Blake, and you don't have to lecture me for that. I had been in a lot of hardest times before I even met you and before I can even afford a steak in a restaurant."

Blake just stared at him. Noelle can't read his emotions.

"But please, please. Tell me if it's gone. Tell me if we have to stop, so I don't wake up in the morning expecting your update. Tell me if you fell out of love or if you really love me at all, because I'm sick of waiting for you to do the things you do before."

Noelle grabbed the bag and with her annoyance, she breathed deeply.

"Tell me an answer, but in a couple of days. Not today, please. I still have filming tomorrow."

Noelle placed her share money by the top of the table. She slid out and walked away.

Only then did Blake grabbed her hand and called out her name.

It sent tickles all over her body. Noelle couldn't turn around fast and stood there like a statue.

"Please, don't walk out this fast."