Letting Go

All those beautiful memories struck her in the most vulnerable way possible.

Noelle pulled on her shorts, her skirt, and even her bra and top. Along with the tears that fall down her cheeks were the hushed breaths and whispers of guilt from Blake. He is still trying to talk it out like his narratives would change her mind completely. Noelle won't, and it wouldn't again.

She would never make herself a fool out of love again. Noelle would never be imprisoned in the same bars that Blake put her through. She's perfectly out of this toxicity that it can never be good in either way of putting a heartfelt way in his memory.

Blake adjusted the belt of his pants and conveyed, "You can't leave me, Noelle! Not after all of this!"

Noelle stuffed in her cell phone and wallet inside her purse and yelled, "I can! Before you even came, I am already at my lowest point! I just survived… well, thank you for your existence, but today, I no longer wanted you to be part of my life!"

She threw the bracelet Blake has given in their first anniversary. She let it fall on the bed, as a sign of decency and respect, and looked at Blake with disgust.

"If only I knew you're going to attack me from behind, I wouldn't even wear that. It's a disgrace for a woman like me. I deserve better than you, Blake!"

Noelle didn't even have plans on glancing back, but Blake ran, towards the door, and stopped her tracks. He pushed the light switch on, and the whole room got flooded. Noelle's fury isn't deescalating, and it just fuel her madness more. Sooner or later, she'll scream and be hysterical here if Blake didn't let her go.

"Noelle, please! You can't just leave me like this! What are you even playing at, huh?! We're not a kid anymore, please!" His face masked the greatest worry of losing a beautiful and kind-hearted woman who can love him for who he was. Monica Ellis can never beat a good woman like her.

"Yeah, I am not a pushover anymore, Blake. I'm not a kid anymore. Do you think I have the guts to be in love with you if I reached this age? No. I'm not willing to be with you after this day, Blake. I'm sorry, but you're too childish to deal at," Noelle stated.

She pushed him out of the way, but Blake grabbed her waist, and dragged her to the middle of the room. Noelle thrashed and shrieked, screaming words like 'harassment' and 'maniac'. Blake didn't let go of her legs and held her arms gently. He couldn't do this… he couldn't let her go.

He knelt down. Blake held her hands tightly. There's no sign of tears in his eyes, but…

He leaned his forehead to her knuckles, and just stay there silently.

"Noelle, please, I don't want to let you go…" he whispered desperately.

In that minute, it struck Noelle. That she's the one leaving, that she's the one who wanted the separation, that she's the only one who wanted to end what was happening for them. Noelle looked at the ceiling, and even though she tried to be harsher than usual, Blake's plead captured her pity.

"We have a lot of dreams together, and that Monica wouldn't ruin that for us."

Blake looked up at Noelle. She stared down, and there, the beads of tears appeared. As if she's waiting for them to show up, she also cried, too. Blake sobbed, asking, "What do I need to tell you for you to come back to me? What…"

Blake intertwined his fingers to her, but Noelle felt his palms were filthy. It's not worthy of her touch anymore. She tried to push away, but his fists were like iron. It grasped her slender fingers, and wouldn't even let go like a leech.

"What do I need to tell you? What do I need to do? What do I need to say, Noelle, please?"

He stood up fast and leaned his forehead to hers. He held the back of her neck, desperately searching for an answer in her eyes, but Noelle can't give her anything. She shook her head repeatedly, whispering, "Nothing, Blake. Nothing you can do will make my trust come back. Please, I'm tired and I want to rest from you. Please, do it for me."

Blake didn't let her face go and caressed it. Noelle shook her head, but she wanted that moment. That letting go phase will be etched in her mind forever. The sound of their cries was the only companion they had for a whole minute.

"I can't do this again, Blake, please. I am so suffocated."

Noelle reached out for their locked hands and removed her fingers. She gently put it back to his sides while Blake was breathing quickly. Noelle looked up at him closely, and pursed her lips. Tears were still there, but he's not moving at all.

Noelle didn't plan on touching him again. Oh well, she does. She grabbed her things from the floor, checked if everything was in there, and held the doorknob…

Then, she remembered…

"I'll retrieve my things after a week. Take us both time to move on and be with ourselves. Don't call, text, or even show up in each other's workplaces. Let's stop everything that connects us together, can we?"

Noelle was gladly reminding him that what they were doing was not for their own sake, but for their own peace. Noelle was glad she would never be worried of him every single day if he hadn't texted, or if he hadn't called, or what he was doing if not talking to her.

"Let's do that, Blake." It was the last words that came out from her lips. She walked out from the hotel room faster than what she planned. Noelle pressed the ground floor, waited for the doors to close, and when they did, tears kept brimming up.

As soon as she came out of the hotel, the rain started to patter. Noelle shielded her eyes and look at the clouds. It was showering, and even though she liked the rain, Noelle found it a bit disturbing. She was in the middle of breaking free from her current boyfriend, and now, she's just labeling him as an ex.

Now the rain comes.

Noelle's tears turned into frustration. She doesn't have an umbrella. Turning to the entrance, Noelle though that Blake would follow and be worried of her. The rain was her weakness, but it's the greatest thing she ever liked in this world.

"He doesn't even fret if I have an umbrella or not."

Noelle wanted to escape the place, so she doesn't care if she's going to get wet or not. As long as she can come to a motel near the place, she'd do it. Noelle walked out of the entrance and towards the parking lot to call a cab.

But as soon as she was running towards there, a man appeared in front of her.

Noelle didn't recognize him first, but he literally stopped her tracks.

"Noelle." The man holding the umbrella… is Cole Rodriguez.